There are a large number of people who like to deal with their internal problems, to be aware of them. The request “I want to understand myself”, “I want to understand why this happens to me in my life” is one of the most popular requests for psychological counseling. He is also one of the most unconstructive. This question combines several typical desires: the desire to be in the spotlight, the desire to feel sorry for myself, the desire to find something that explains my failures — and, ultimately, the desire to solve my problems without really doing anything for it.
It is a mistake to believe that awareness of a problem automatically leads to its elimination. No, it’s not. This myth has been exploited by psychoanalysis for many years, but this is not confirmed by practice. If a reasonable and strong-willed person, realizing the problem, sets goals and takes the necessary actions, these actions can eliminate the problem. By itself, awareness of the problem rarely changes anything.
On the other hand, awareness of the problem is a thing of exceptional importance. In intelligent and strong-willed people, awareness of the problem leads to the setting of a goal and then to rational activity that can eliminate the problem.
In order for the problem to start moving and motivating, you need its awareness, understanding that something is not just a feature, not just some circumstance, of which there are many — but a problem, that is, something serious and threatening. You need at least a little, even with your head — but be scared. This is creating problems, this is problematization, but this is sometimes justified.
If a girl smokes and doesn’t consider it her problem, it’s in vain. It’s better to call it a problem.
Awareness of the problem is the first step in translating problems into tasks.