We are constantly changing, although we do not always notice it. Life changes can make us happier or sadder, give us wisdom or make us disappointed in ourselves. It all depends on whether we are ready for change.
1. The appearance of a pet
The number of likes under pictures with cats in social networks speaks eloquently about the love for four-legged animals. This is not news: pets create an atmosphere of comfort, help to cope with stress and anxiety. In homes where a cat or dog lives, people are less likely to suffer from heart disease. Many people choose a pet for themselves, take care of it like a family member.
But even an ordinary yard dog or cat from a shelter can be a source of joy for a long time. Those who play with pets for 15 to 20 minutes a day increase levels of serotonin and oxytocin, neurotransmitters traditionally associated with joy and happiness. The reverse is also true: in dogs, oxytocin levels also increase during interaction with the owner.
2. Getting married
The stress that we experience when planning a wedding is overridden by the joy of the prospect of linking life with a loved one. In addition to the obvious gain, married people receive psychological immunity — they suffer less depression, are less likely to become addicted to drugs, and are more satisfied with themselves and their lives than single people. True, these benefits are available only to those who are happily married.
Women’s style of conflict resolution involves more empathy and attunement to the partner’s feelings.
In dysfunctional families, the psychological climate is rather oppressive, the listed threats become even more dangerous. Stress, anxiety and emotional abuse affect women the most. And it’s not that they tend to take everything to heart.
The reason is in the mechanisms of conflict resolution: women’s style involves more empathy and attunement to the feelings of a partner, while husbands are usually less responsive and in a conflict situation they rather prefer to avoid an unpleasant conversation.
3. Divorce
Parting with someone who was once deeply loved can be even more serious test than his death. Indeed, in this case, we experience bitter disappointment — in our choice, our hopes and dreams. We can lose our bearings and fall into deep depression.
4. Having children
With the advent of children, life becomes brighter and richer. That’s what common sense says. But statistics show that things are not so clear cut. A 2015 study showed that parents-to-be tended to experience the news of a new addition to their family with excitement and excitement. But later on, two-thirds of them experienced a drop in happiness levels in the second year of raising a child, when the initial euphoria passed and life returned to a stable course.
Pregnancy should be desired, and we should feel support from loved ones, especially in the early years.
True, an earlier study does add optimism: today, parents in general are no happier than 20 years ago, but they are still happier than those who have no children at all. As for the conditions that determine whether the birth of a child will be a positive experience for us, psychologists are almost unanimous: pregnancy should be desired, and we should feel support from loved ones, especially in the early years.
5. Death of parents
Although we all go through this and may try to prepare ourselves in advance, the loss of a loved one is still a tragedy. How strong the feeling of grief will be depends on the connection with the parent. Usually, men grieve more about the loss of their father, while girls find it difficult to come to terms with the loss of their mother.
The younger we are, the more it hurts. Children who lost their parents when they were young have weaker immune systems and are more at risk of depression and suicide. The risk increases if the parents were unhappy and passed away by committing suicide.