Why do we sometimes no longer want to have sex during pregnancy?

What holds back the libido?

Hormonal change can influence desire, but it is more conditioned by education, beliefs, prohibitions, knowledge of one’s body, fear of miscarriage or prematurely giving birth… It all depends also of the understanding of the couple before, and of what was the driving force of their sexual activity. If it was the desire for a child, once pregnant, it may decrease.

Is the decrease in desire during pregnancy systematic?

No. Studies often show a decrease in the 1st and 3rd trimester, and an increase in desire in the 2nd trimester of pregnancy, but some women may also have less desire or, conversely, more.

Why does libido fluctuate during pregnancy?

The 1st trimester, the decrease is often due to the evils of pregnancy (nausea, vomiting, fatigue, irritability…), but also to the fear of miscarriage. In the second trimester, the physical discomfort disappears. The vulva is more lubricated due to better blood supply and the woman finds pleasant sensations, underlines Véronique Simonnot. And in the 2rd trimester, the big belly can interfere with lovemaking. There is also the fear of hurting the baby, inducing labor, and the feeling of being “watched” by the unborn child.

How long can this drop last?

If the sexual understanding was good before pregnancy, the desire can quickly return. It also depends on the partner. Some men develop madonna syndrome. They perceive their partner more as the future mother of their child and less as a lover.

How can we revive the libido?

The specialist suggests taking the time to seduce yourself again, as at the beginning. It also means taking care of yourself to seduce yourself, make a date, be tender, caress yourself … You can keep “a living distance” to keep the flame alive, miss each other without going too far away . We vary the drivers of this desire: the desire to unload our impulses, to have fun …

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