Many are those who, one day or another, have encountered, on their way, a seducer, the champion of fleeting history. Seduction is a driving force in human relationships, but beware of destruction.

From the Latin “ducere”, “lead”, the seducer will lead you but by boat… Because this man is irresistible. Sure of himself, he speaks, he speaks… he is a virtuoso of orality. Shining in society is his art. He loves to take any opportunity to remind you of his skills. Whether it’s his last particularly luxurious purchase, his sporting victories, or his physical attributes, he believes he can woo you by flaunting his abilities. He manages to monopolize the word while making his interlocutors believe that they are very brilliant and worthy of his interest. And we find it amazing. He looks at you and you are the chosen one… Of one evening, most certainly, only of one evening.

Very quickly, the seducer will set out to conquer other territories, the conqueror will fascinate other preys or subjugate other audiences. Because there is no affectation in the matter, but the quest for novelty for a well-filled hunting scene. Making numbers is the goal of the seducer. And for that, he trains constantly. He follows very precise rules, he spends hours in the evenings or on dating sites. He “calibrates” his actions, not too cash, not too soft. There is no place for feelings, what interests him is conquest, to go from a disinterested girl to a girl who becomes consenting, there is success. Its primary weapon is intuition, which is based on two principles: knowing the secret desires of others and putting yourself in your own skin. From there, any way is good, you just have to try. Knowing that he succeeds while others row makes him happy. One way to feel a certain power. Seduction is a practice the mastery of which brings great pleasure to this never satiated hunter.

Listen to him, he easily takes control of the conversation, don’t you feel that his sentences have been repeated, that they belong to a pre-recorded text? Doesn’t he seem like he wants to change the topic of conversation and fill in the blanks with the same kind of sexually-oriented jokes?

As he likes to spend his time browsing, he often tends to reuse the same type of sentences: he is on autopilot. Smile in the corner, laughing eyes, he seduced you but does not seem excited by your proposal for an outing or weekend. His interest in you will be very quick before moving on. As he seeks fleeting carnal relationships, he will tend to compliment you on your physique and tell you that life is too short not to enjoy it. Now is the time to ask yourself the right questions: is it giving you a good time? Is this man consistent between what he says and what he does? Does he care for you, is he really interested in you? Are they sending you messages that really show they like you? Remember, it’s in deeds that a man shows he cares about you. If you are looking for a stable relationship, you have spotted this seducer, put him out of “you” state. It’s up to you to give the rules of the game and the limits, take it or leave it.

With a confident air, a sense of repartee, easy laughter, seducers need the eyes of others to reassure themselves. Needing to please at all costs, to be seen, to be noticed, is a way of asking the other to take an interest in oneself. In adolescence, to please is important even if it means transforming a little, adapting to what the other expects, this is normal behavior.

After adolescence, when they become a young adult, people who have a fairly solid build no longer need to wear this mask of seduction, they accept not to please everyone. For compulsive seducers, this is not the case. The fear of not being loved for who they really are persists, hence the masks. “And those who wear a mask are doomed to wear it” (Oscar Wilde). This behavior shows a lack of self-confidence, a lack to be filled. This happens especially in people who have not been given enough prominence by their parents. Not being sure of his value, the seducer needs to be constantly reassured by raising the bar higher and higher. Very often, he makes his new partner think that she will be the last, the one who will finally know how to satisfy him. However, he cannot be faithful, for each conquest is a new achievement and to give up conquering would be a bit like giving up living.

His actions also reveal his difficulty in accepting his desire and, in particular, his desire vis-à-vis a woman. In the eyes of the seducer, pierces the inconsistency of a fleeting desire. His desire to seduce is based on a narcissistic flaw, an insatiable dependence on others.