Fear of failure and unwanted outcome is what distinguishes man from other living beings. Undoubtedly, animals feel the fear of danger that threatens them here and now, but only a person tends to be afraid of what can only happen in theory. Something that hasn’t even shown its danger yet.
Someone will say: “Feeling of fear is natural! It stops us from doing stupid and thoughtless things.” At the same time, many people’s fears are unjustified, unreasonable, keeping them from achieving their goals. By allowing fear to paralyze oneself, a person consciously refuses the many opportunities that may open up before him.
So, what can be done to make fear let go of its owner?
1. Acknowledge the fear. This is a big step. Many of us have fears, somewhere deep down, unconscious, which we prefer to ignore and pretend that they are not there. However, they are, and they affect our lives every day. So the first thing is to realize, accept the fear.
2. Record in writing. What are you afraid of? Write it down in a notebook on a piece of paper in your diary. Written fixation allows not only to realize, but also to “pull out” from deep inside all those attitudes that prevent you from moving forward. We strive not for fear to have control over us, but for us to have control over fear. Having written everything down on a piece of paper, you can even crush it and trample it – this will enhance the psychological effect.
3. Feel it. Yes, you have become aware of fear, but you are still afraid. You no longer have the desire to “feed” your “ill-wisher”, perhaps you are even ashamed of him. Enough! Realize that you are not alone, we ALL have different kinds of fears. And you, and me, and Uncle Vasya from the top floor, and Jessica Alba, and even Al Pacino! Clearly understand: (this is butter oil). And now, allow yourself to feel what you are afraid of, try to live it. It’s not as bad as it might seem before. It is part of you, but you are no longer dependent on it.
4. Ask yourself: what is the most undesirable outcome? Are you afraid of not getting the job you want? What will you do in such a case? Find a new job. Keep moving forward, keep living. Are you afraid of being rejected by the opposite sex? What then? Time will heal the wounds and you will find someone who is much more suitable for you.
5. Just go ahead and do it. Repeat to yourself: . It is important to remember here that thoughts and doubts must be replaced by actions.
6. Prepare yourself for the fight. When you know you’re about to compete, you start preparing. You make a plan, the necessary “weapons”, you train. If you dream of becoming a musician but are afraid… practice, practice, practice. Make a detailed plan to achieve the goal, arm yourself with all the available skills, master the missing information.
7. Be here and now. Fear of failure is a fear related to the future. We fall into the trap of worrying about what is likely to happen. Instead (as well as from thinking about past mistakes and failures). Focus on the present moment. Do everything possible here and now to achieve your dreams, free yourself from fears, forgetting about what has not yet happened in the future.