PSYchology

In a strange house and in an unfamiliar country it is uncomfortable. Every now and then you’re afraid to make a mistake. What comes to the fore is what is called customs, but I’m just not familiar with them …

During his still small years, Kostya changed several jobs. Not because he was a person of conflict — the situation on the market was changing rapidly. First, a classmate seduced him by editing at a publishing house, which he himself led. It seemed like an unheard of luck — the relationship is good, a favorable reception is guaranteed. At first, that’s how it worked out. Family feasts, common weekends.

But the matter imperceptibly began to deteriorate. They did not even notice how they moved from publishing books to making brochures, then to badges for festivals and conferences.

There was no more family familiarity at the next job, although the style is democratic. With the boss, a man under fifty, everyone was on «you». He worked, and upset, and dismissed in a low voice, as if inviting for tea. Then there was a more serious company, and relations in it were more severe, hierarchical. This regulation, however, was paid higher.

And everything would be fine. But then fate elevated Kostya to the position of head of a department of a large company. People came with their experience, including the style of communication adopted at their previous work. All three familiar business manners were here. However, now he himself became the legislator. Whatever format you choose, secret ridicule by some, embarrassment by others, misunderstanding by others cannot be avoided. How to be?

You need to be able to adapt to everyone, while not forgetting about the benefits of the case

The style is flexible, individual and ritual at the same time.

It is necessary to respond to the expectation of another, not to lose yourself and achieve your goal. Being a free man, by the way, Pushkin did an excellent job with this.

In letters, he artistically got used to the manner of the interlocutor, kept in mind the circle of his interests, remembered his tastes and predilections. And if necessary, about his social position. He addresses his close friend Nashchokin: «Hello, dear Pavel Voinovich …»

To his wife: «You, my wife, are very careless (I wrote the word by force).» He signs the letter to Benckendorff, observing all the figures of speech, but imitating sincerity: “With a feeling of deepest reverence and heartfelt devotion, I have the honor to be, gracious sovereign, Your Excellency, the most humble servant …” and so on. Each time, he observes tact and measure, does not fall into familiarity or servility, is light, serious and friendly. At the same time, everywhere — he, Pushkin.

This is required by any relationship, including business. It is not necessary to focus on stereotypes (although paint or a detail can be useful from each model), but proceed from yourself, from your attitude towards people. Keeping in mind the benefit of the cause.

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