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1,5% stay-at-home fathers in France
Seven out of ten fathers take their paternity leave in France. On the other hand, few are those who decide to stop working for more than 11 days to take care of their children all week. Thus, only 4% of men extend their paternity leave to take a parental education leave. And according to INSEE, the number of stay-at-home fathers (commonly called PAF) falls to 1,5%! And yet, according to a survey carried out by Sarenza in 2015 (1), 65% of men would be ready to become men at home. Too bad they are so few to dare. Especially when you know how hard it is for mothers to find a satisfactory work-life balance, given the lack of nursery places, companies’ reluctance to make their hours more flexible or to grant teleworking. What is holding back dads from choosing the kids over the office? The fear of not thriving. According to the survey conducted by Sarenza, 40% of them fear being bored at home or do not feel capable of being inactive …
The right way to get the most out of your kids
An argument that stay-at-home dads quickly dismiss. Rieg is 37 years old. He quit his job to take care of 100% of his second child for a year, and did not spend 12 months lazing around, far from it… He quipped: “I was really able to understand my wife’s daily life. ! »And complete« It’s a unique and strong moment, you have to live it to the fullest. Before, I ended up spending little time with my one-year-old daughter, and after a few days at home, we managed to recreate a real bond. But the choice of staying at home for the father also sometimes responds to a economic logic. Unemployment or a salary much lower than that of the mother may cause couples to organize themselves in this way and in the process save childcare costs and part of the taxes. In this case, beware of disappointments, because managing the daily life of children requires considerable energy and patience 24 hours a day. And breaks and RTT do not exist!
Tips for becoming a happy stay-at-home dad
Benjamin Buhot, aka Till the Cat, the web’s most famous PAF blogger, insists on the need to become a stay-at-home dad by choice and not by coercion. Otherwise, fathers may lack rsocial knowledge in the eyes of those around them. Especially if they still consider money as a marker of success … It can also jeopardize the balance of the couple. The mother who pursues her career at full speed and relies on her spouse for the education of the children and the management of the household, must agree to delegate tasks which are still unfortunately deemed “feminine”. In short, it takes a lot open-mindedness and mutual trust. Another pitfall to avoid: loneliness. Stay-at-home fathers, especially if they had a profession where human contact was very regular, had an interest in getting involved in parents’ associations and other groups of parents to discuss their questions and keep a link with the world around them. Some fathers make an intermediate choice and slow down in their professional life to take care of their children, but also to pursue other personal goals: business creation, retraining, creative project … In this case, the the job of a stay-at-home father is a transition and not a choice of life for the years to come. To meditate as a couple?
For further…
– Paternity leave in practice
– Damien Lorton’s book: “The father is a mother like the others”
(1) Study “Do the professions have a gender according to men?”, Carried out by Sarenza in partnership with Harris Interactive on the occasion of Women’s Day, among 500 men aged 18 and over.