Hello, dear readers of the site! Today we will talk about what constitutes a sensitive accentuation from the classification of character types according to Lichko. And we will also find out its resource sides and those that should be paid attention to in the development process.
Characteristics of character
Sensitive people are overly sensitive, so they often experience stress, which gradually destroys their health, both physical and sometimes mental. For example, it is among this type of accentuation that phobias, psychoses and depressions are most often observed.
The unpleasant situations that they live through are not digested as an experience on which to build on in the future. On the contrary, they serve as a kind of limiter of actions. Fearing repetition, they withdraw into themselves, refusing to take risks and try new things.
They are very demanding of themselves, for any slightest mistake they will indulge in self-criticism and self-abasement. Therefore, any failures are perceived as the end of the world, recovering after them is long and hard.
But success is attributed only to well-established circumstances, completely devaluing their efforts, which they invested in order to achieve it.
He does not like big companies, preferring intimacy, only then is he able to open up to the fullest.
If you communicate with him rudely, in a raised voice, he will definitely close in himself and will avoid further meetings with such a person.
Sensitives have a highly developed morality, you can certainly rely on them, they will fulfill their duty in spite of any circumstances, with the exception of moments when they are afraid of publicity and so on. Then they can give up, run away from the scene.
Usually they are not interested in alcohol and drugs, even smoking is extremely negative.
Perhaps because in an altered state they do not experience euphoria, but only begin to blame themselves even more for their wrong behavior, bad habits. And the level of self-deprecation is already quite high, in contrast to self-esteem.
In society, such people are considered the most decent, honest, with a developed sense of justice and morality.
Detstvo
Sensitive children are usually called «home», and all because they do not tend to spend their free time with noisy and active peers. Moreover, they do not play outdoor games, during which you can get hurt, tired.
They are obedient, as they are very impressionable and vulnerable, which is why it is hard for them to experience any criticism and disapproval from adults. Therefore, in order not to get into such unpleasant situations, they adapt to any rules and requirements of those with whom they have to interact.
It is not difficult to understand that a child belongs to this accentuation of character — he is afraid of everything in the world. Starting with darkness, loneliness and ending with the fear of various animals, insects. Some even develop cynophobia, that is, an irrational uncontrollable fear of dogs.
They are timid and shy, usually hiding behind their mom or dad when meeting other people. If they turn to them, they are silent and do not look into their eyes.
This happens not because they are not interested in communicating, it’s just that at this moment it is so difficult for them to cope with their feelings that they are not even able to squeeze out a couple of words.
Free time is spent reading, modeling, drawing. They love to mess with the kids, teach them something, change clothes, feed and so on.
At first glance, it seems that they are completely unsociable, but this is not so. People they are accustomed to and can trust have the opportunity to know the full depth of their inner world.
Training
They study diligently so that they do not have to feel shame for their poor performance in front of the whole class. If classmates offend, and it is not possible to establish contact with them, they still refuse to transfer to another school.
Adaptation is not easy, which makes it easier for them to endure bullying than to adapt again to new conditions, get used to other complete strangers.
When called to the board and asked something, they are ready to receive a low mark, despite the fact that they know the answer, so long as they do not have to squeeze it out of themselves in front of everyone. Therefore, written work is usually excellent for them, but oral work is not quite.
It seems to them that if they say at least one word in public, they will be laughed at by classmates and, in general, the whole school will subsequently tease.
Or they will tell everything they know, get a good grade, and others will consider this act an attempt to stand out and begin to persecute, mock.
Puberty
For parents, the teenage years of their child go by almost unnoticed. This refers to the absence of conflicts, escapes from home and riots, whims.
And all because it manifests itself completely differently from the rest. Sensitives simply become even more impressionable and self-critical, it seems to them that they are literally underdeveloped and do not reach the level of ordinary normal people.
Why are they completely immersed in the process of self-flagellation, reflections on their difficult fate. If an adult tries to encroach on freedom or lectures, instead of an explosion of emotions typical of teenagers due to hormonal changes, they will simply close themselves even more in themselves, spending the whole evening in tears and experiencing despair.
They are tormented by remorse in those matters that usually do not bother other children at that age. For example, onanism is considered a manifestation of the weakness of the spirit, and not a completely natural need for a growing and changing organism.
They are unable to stop attempts at self-satisfaction, which is why after each episode they suffer, blame themselves, and sometimes punish them, limiting them in some way. In general, all the troubles that then occur are considered retribution for a shameful hobby.
They are afraid of their peers because they seem cruel, aggressive, or too successful and ideal. To be near them, sometimes they try to fit in, playing the role of cheeky and arrogant personalities, sometimes out of place cheerful and carefree.
But when those around them, before whom they pretended to, become closer to them, they reveal their true character, which is incredibly surprising.
Suppose, if an unpleasant incident occurs, and someone takes pity on the sensitive, despite the fact that he tried to show that he was not at all upset because of such a trifle, then he will begin to sob at the top, instantly losing his pompous image and becoming “real”.
Recommendations
- To increase your self-esteem, you should do those things that give pleasure, arouse interest. Usually sensitives try to develop their weaknesses, which is why they go into aggressive sports, try to build a career, often speaking to the public, and so on. This is called hypercompensation, that is, a person seems to be trying to prove to himself that he is able to cope with his weaknesses, that he is not a coward. If you enjoy reading books, cross stitching, and playing the guitar, make time for these activities, instead of skydiving, boxing, wrestling, and so on.
- If your child has such a sensitive nature, handle him carefully, hardening and preparing for a harsh social life can turn into a crash, only increasing the development of phobic disorders.
- Work on your self-esteem, it must be increased. Then you can achieve a sense of inner harmony, torment and anxiety will go away. Excessive demands on oneself will not help to become better, but will only bring the appearance of neurosis and other mental disorders closer.
- Learn to rely on your feelings and desires, not adjusting to others. You can’t please everyone in the world, but you can spoil your life by pushing your own ambitions into the background.
- Dose the loads of such a child, otherwise, having made a mistake from fatigue, he will decide that he is a loser. Avoid excessive patronage towards him, leave the opportunity for him to gain experience, learn something. Because by doing his job, you will only confirm his ideas about insignificance and inability to cope with difficulties on his own.
Completion
Finally, we want to recommend that you familiarize yourself with all the existing types of character accentuations, both according to Lichko’s classification and according to Leonhard.
Thanks to this knowledge, it will be easier for you to understand the actions of other people, and this will reduce the number of conflict situations and, in general, will help to establish relationships with those with whom it was not possible before.
You can start, for example, with hyperthymia — this is an active, inquisitive and optimistic person.
Take care of yourself and be happy!
The material was prepared by a psychologist, Gestalt therapist, Zhuravina Alina