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The fear of seeing your body transform
Sophie, very thin before her pregnancy, feels deformed and slowed down by this five-month-old belly. She suffers from her weight gain, emerging stretch marks on her stomach, and fears her husband’s gaze on her body.
>> What’s going on? “It is true that it is difficult to immediately accept the transformations of the body, a body on which the eyes weigh, which changes the relationship with others and also transforms the sexuality of the couple”, notes Fabienne Sardas.
>> What you can do. Pamper yourself! This transformation is only temporary. To tame this new body, take care of it. Massage yourself with anti-stretch mark and moisturizing creams, go to a beauty salon where you will be taken care of, and ask the midwife for dietary advice if you gain too much weight.
Let yourself be seduced by your companion. It’s a safe bet that your spouse, despite your curves, does not reject you. He may be intimidated by your situation, but nothing prevents you from maintaining a fulfilling sexuality, even if it is necessary to adapt it according to the evolution of your pregnancy.
Fear of having a sick or disabled baby
Alice is entering her fifth month of pregnancy and, with each medical check-up, she is worried about her baby. She fears that he is suffering from a serious pathology or a malformation.
>> What’s going on? “This worry about giving birth to a baby with an anomaly is very common among future parents,” explains Fabienne Sardas. “Pregnancy is marked by the time of expectations, those of the next ultrasound, certain medical results, etc. For some women, what is also anxiety-provoking is not to feel the baby’s movements at the start of pregnancy, ”notes Zoé Piveteau.
>> What you can do. Respect prenatal consultations. Prenatal examinations (listening to the baby’s heart, ultrasounds, screening test for trisomy 21, etc.) are recommended throughout your pregnancy to ensure that it goes smoothly. Do not miss them because they allow you to follow the evolution of your baby. Hearing your heartbeat or seeing it move on an ultrasound are all ways to gain confidence and calm down.
Talk about your concern. If you are very anxious, you can contact the psychologists in your maternity hospital. You will be received as many times as you want for approximately 45 minutes. These professionals are trained to accompany and support you throughout your pregnancy.
Fear of childbirth
Claire, 7 months pregnant, begins to have anxieties about her childbirth. She is afraid of being in pain, that the epidural will not work, of being isolated during labor …
>> What’s going on? “It happens that the future mother is bathed in stories of difficult childbirth, explains Geraldine Mercat, midwife. It could be her mother who gave birth prematurely, a friend who told her about her difficult birth… ”
>> What you can do. Don’t neglect preparing for childbirth. You will learn a lot about your body, how to manage contractions and pain. This space also allows you to ask all your questions about the birth. For those who prefer small committees, it is possible to follow a preparation with a liberal midwife. The coverage by Social Security is the same, and it is sometimes easier to talk about your fears without feeling the gaze of others on you.
Write your birth plan. Recommended by the Haute Autorité de Santé, the Birth Plan consists of writing down or saying your wishes in relation to the birth: the presence or absence of the father, the epidural… The more you will feel like an actress, the less you will be afraid of the unknown. Putting down your apprehensions in writing also allows you to take a step back.
“The 4th month maintenance, optional, but important! ” Géraldine Mercat, midwife
“In addition to the seven antenatal medical consultations planned during your pregnancy, the public authorities have set up an optional 4th month interview. For 45 minutes, the future mother is received by a doctor or a midwife. She can ask all her questions and address, if necessary, her psychological, material and emotional difficulties. If necessary, she will be referred to a professional (tobacco specialist, dietician, psychologist, social worker, etc.) who can support her throughout this period. “
Auteur: Elisabeth de La Morandière