The biggest and most devastating loss is the death of your child. It is a pain that cannot be put into words, that cannot be shared or simply forgotten. To overcome this, appropriate measures must be taken, otherwise a person may not be able to withstand his grief. This material is for those who have had a misfortune or for those whose loved ones have experienced loss.
A person who has experienced a loss must remember that he has the right to all his feelings and emotions. For the first year after the incident, he will be as if in oblivion. These can include fluctuations in anger, guilt, denial and fear, all of which are normal after the loss of a loved one. As time passes, the oblivion will begin to fade, and he will return to reality. Many parents say that the second year is the hardest, but in fact the brain creates this numbness to protect the person from the crazy, complete removal from the memory of our loss. He is afraid that we will forget, so he keeps this state as much as possible.
Remember that grief lasts as long as necessary. Every person is just a person. There are many similarities in the processes that all parents go through, but everything happens differently for each. All a person can do is take care of himself.
To survive tragedy, you must realize that grief must be selfish. A person who is faced with a loss needs to think about himself and take care of himself, because at first he will not be morally able to take care of his relatives and friends.
A person does not go crazy, no matter what he does and no matter how he behaves. He mourns the loss of a loved one.
What to do and how to behave
– If possible, it is better to leave work either earlier or take a vacation. However, here, too, you should rely on yourself, since it is work that saves some parents and people who have experienced grief.
Sleep is very important because it helps fight stress.
– A person facing grief needs to eat and drink for energy.
– Alcohol and drugs should be avoided, no matter how tempting it may be. These substances negatively affect the nervous system and only exacerbate depression.
No one has the right to dictate to a person how he should react. Only he knows what sits deep inside him.
“It’s okay to take a break from grief, smile, laugh and enjoy life. This does not mean that a person forgets about his loss – it is simply impossible.
It has been scientifically proven that a loss of this magnitude is similar to a serious psychological trauma.
It is important to set healthy boundaries for yourself. A person should have a time and a place to grieve. It’s okay to isolate yourself from society and do it alone. The main thing is that he does not completely withdraw into himself.
Need to find support. Family and friends, online support groups or, best of all, a psychotherapist. Again, we repeat that a person who has experienced grief does not go crazy, going to a psychotherapist is a normal practice that can help him. Someone also helps religion, charity.
Remember that no one can truly understand the grief of someone who has experienced a loss. But loved ones should know how they can help. Relatives must understand that a person has changed forever, and they must accept this grief. It is important to let people know that they are not alone.
We will not write about specific examples, but it is important to understand that very often it is the media that can induce even more panic and detachment for people who are experiencing grief. It is important to remember that much of what is written by the press and filmed by television is inciting even more panic, confusion and other things. Unfortunately, people who are not involved in politics or the media will not be able to know for sure which information is true. Be reasonable.
We address absolutely everyone. All you can do is not go for provocations in the media. Please do not spread unverified information yourself and do not believe in what is not proven. Once again, we cannot know how things really happen.
Take care of yourself and your loved ones.