10 principles for a happy life in Danish

The Danes are the happiest people in the world, according to ratings and opinion polls. PR specialist Malin Rydal was born in Denmark, but only from a distance, having lived in another country, she was able to impartially look at the model that makes them happy. She described it in the book Happy Like Danes.

Among the values ​​that she discovered are the trust of citizens in each other and in the state, the availability of education, the lack of ambition and large material demands, and indifference to money. Personal independence and the ability to choose your own path from an early age: almost 70% of Danes leave their parental home at 18 to start living on their own.

The author shares the principles of life that help her to be happy.

1. My best friend is myself. It is damn important to come to terms with yourself, otherwise the journey through life can be too long and even painful. Listening to ourselves, learning to know ourselves, taking care of ourselves, we create a reliable foundation for a happy life.

2. I no longer compare myself to others. If you don’t want to feel miserable, don’t compare, stop the hellish race «more, more, never enough», don’t strive to get more than others have. Only one comparison is productive — with those who have less than you. Just do not perceive yourself as a being of a higher order and always remember how lucky you are!

3. I forget about norms and social pressures. The more freedom we have to do what we think is right and do it the way we want, the more likely it is to “enter the phase” with ourselves and live “our own” life, and not the one that was expected of us.

4. I always have a plan B. When a person thinks that he has only one path in life, he is afraid of losing what he has. Fear often makes us make bad decisions. As we consider alternative paths, we more easily find the courage to respond to the challenges of our Plan A.

5. I choose my own battles. We fight every day. Big and small. But we cannot accept every challenge. It is important to be able to choose a fight on the shoulder, one that can teach something. And in other cases, you should take the example of a goose, shaking off excess water from its wings.

6. I am honest with myself and accept the truth. Accurate diagnosis is followed by correct treatment: no correct decision can be based on a lie.

7. I cultivate idealism… realistic. It is vitally important to make plans that give meaning to our existence…while having realistic expectations. The same applies to our relationship: the less high expectations you have in relation to other people, the more likely you are to be pleasantly surprised.

8. I live in the present. Living in the present means choosing to travel inward, not fantasizing about the destination, and not regretting the starting point. I keep in mind a phrase said to me by a beautiful woman: «The goal is on the path, but this path has no goal.» We are on the road, the landscape flashes outside the window, we are moving forward, and, in fact, this is all we have. Happiness is a reward for the one who walks, and at the final point it rarely happens.

9. I have many different sources of prosperity. In other words, I don’t «put all my eggs in one basket.» Dependence on one source of happiness — a job or a loved one — is very risky, because it is fragile. If you are attached to many people, if you enjoy different activities, your every day is perfectly balanced. For me, laughter is an invaluable source of balance — it gives an instant feeling of happiness.

10. I love other people. I believe that the most wonderful sources of happiness are love, sharing, and generosity. By sharing and giving, a person multiplies moments of happiness and lays the foundations for long-term prosperity. Albert Schweitzer, who received the Nobel Peace Prize in 1952, was right when he said, “Happiness is the only thing in the world that doubles when divided.”

Source: M. Rydal Happy Like Danes (Phantom Press, 2016).