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Family happiness and good relationships between partners is the key to the strength of a marriage, which is under pressure from career plans, work stress, problems of relatives, the need to lead a life and think about material well-being. There are traditions that will help you overcome these reefs and find yourself in a safe harbor. 10 family traditions will help you enjoy even sunny joy and the azure sea of family life.
1. Give gifts for no reason.
Joy is hidden in the little things. In order to make a dear person pleasant, you should not wait for calendar occasions in the form of a birthday or March 8th. Moreover, forced gifts on significant dates, made on the basis of obligations, have long ceased to bring the expected happiness. All these forcedly presented sets of socks and shaving foams cause only a sad smile.
Any thing donated just like that, without coercion in the form of «holiday flower and smiles» or «all men’s day»can improve your mood for the whole day. A handy ballpoint pen, a diary, a pack of funny stickers, a flash drive, a lush rose, a game disc, a scarf or a pair of gloves, a soft comb — every little thing speaks of attention, which is always nice. The only problem is that when choosing a gift, you won’t be able to get off with a standard store solution. You have to think about what your spouse might like.
2. Complete a common mission.
It can be sports, hiking, repair or garden work — any joint physical activity is useful in maintaining family harmony. Such matters should be planned in advance together, after conferring, so that both spouses consider this process important and are ready to devote time to it. The situation in which the wife demands from her husband to go to serve his duty in the mother-in-law’s country garden, unacceptable.
Everything should be voluntary: if there is a garden, then by mutual desire, a trip only to where both want to go, repairs only when two people want it. Joint work for the benefit of the family, chosen at will and according to interests, will bring together and akin a man and a woman, teach them to cooperate, distribute tasks and agree in the process. You can live together all your life without ever learning how to work together.
3. At least once a day, eat together.
In the morning you have to jump up, hurriedly make your bed, put on a suit, grab the necessary things and, having swallowed a cup of coffee, run to start the car or wait for the bus in order to get to work on time. Lunch is most often held in a circle of colleagues near the workplace. And only dinner often leaves the couple time for leisurely communication.
Share at least one meal a day extremely important family tradition. Setting the table together, cutting and preparing food, sitting together at the same table, looking into each other’s eyes and having leisurely conversations — this is the embodiment of a family. Such a feast is suitable for sharing impressions and experiences, laughing together or mourning. No one will feel lonely in a family in which dinner is necessarily considered a common family affair.
4. The tradition of leaving personal space.
It can be weekly gatherings with girlfriends or friends for football, in a beauty salon or in a country house. Main condition — do not share these impressions with your spouse. Married couples need to rest from each other. In the life of a husband and wife there should be areas that are not connected with loved ones.
Let it be other people, new places or experiences that do not involve the participation of the second half in this process. You can share your impressions, but you need to get them yourself. This will give the necessary discharge from the tension, which necessarily accumulates in the process of interaction between husband and wife.
Kitchen gatherings on the couch at a mom’s or university friend’s, and for a man at a bar or at a friend’s apartment do more to maintain family harmony than books on psychology or self-improvement courses.
5. Building a common future.
It is not necessary to make a morocco album with an ornate gold inscription «Our plans». It is enough to be able to talk and share desires. It is sad to read stories about the fact that he dreamed of changing the car, and she was completely unprepared for this. Or, on the other hand, she wanted a new kitchen set, and he planned to invest all the savings in expanding the living space.
Global major purchases and projects, whether it be a car, a summer residence, furniture, repairs, education or a trip, can serve as a reason for a quarrel, as well as an all-powerful unifying principle. There is no need to wait for the partner to guess what is going on in the head of the spouse. Obvious things do not exist, everything should be agreed in advance. Only those options that suit both will please the result.
The world is changing, a new ethic and new criteria for family relationships are on the threshold. Duties that arise in the common area to meet the needs of the family must be divided equally. This applies to absolutely all routine matters: notorious dishwashing, food preparation, laundry, cleaning, child and pet care, transportation service and so on. Each family has an extensive list that meets its needs in terms of the level of comfort of life.
A fair division of unpleasant affairs contributes to mutual understanding and reduces the level of tension in the relationship. There will be no more resentment and resentment. Honest sincere participation in family life makes her happy.
7. Keep your word.
This tradition seems obvious, because everyone considers themselves honest people. In fact, the need to keep a promise often collides with a merciless reality in the form of fatigue, stress, problems at work, laziness and a simple unwillingness to do something. Within the family, you want to allow yourself more freedom. With other people, a person rarely allows himself such liberties, because he will immediately face the consequences in the form of distrust and hostility towards himself. The same goes for the family.
Broken word and broken promise share partners, putting a heavy burden in the treasury of troubles. Family members should be perceived as the most important partners in life, which in no case should be let down. Tiny disorders, like a drop of water, can undermine the huge and strong-looking stone of marital trust.
Husband promised to go to the theater with his wife? You have to leave fatigue aside and put on a jacket, even if you want to lie down in front of the TV. Did your wife say she’d like to visit her mother-in-law together this weekend? A visit to the salon can be rescheduled for another day.
8. Create a holiday.
A holiday is needed random, for no reason at all or for a completely far-fetched reason. Its meaning is to experience joy together. Let it be an unexpected trip to a restaurant, a nightclub, karting, bowling, cinema. An unexpected tourist trip to local attractions, last-minute tours or an unplanned walk through the snowy streets of the city. Ride in a taxi through iconic city places, get out to the lake to skate on flat ice, make a snowman in the park near the office, and then warm up at home with tea and cake. No matter what will be done — a casual holiday will give a feeling of miracle and ease of life.
9. Take care of each other.
The wife is lying on the bed, hiding her hands in the sleeves of a house sweater and pulling her legs up to her chest? She’s probably cold. Why not bring a warm blanket to cover your chilled shoulders? A mug of tea would be nice too. And how much warmth and gratitude will be expressed by the warmed wife!
Unobtrusive care, attentive attitude to each other, the desire to please the partner — that family foundationon which long, happy marriages are built. People live together because they want to care and receive attention. A little effort on yourself, and soon a wonderful family tradition will appear, which for many years will be the basis for a particle of light in one young family.
10. Support each other.
Family is a ship, which goes through the vast cold ocean. A storm is raging around, severe waves are beating the sides, and the winds are trying to rip off the sails in order to leave the ship unable to move. If the crew members do not work together, the ship will not be able to sustain the journey.
Therefore, whatever happens around and within the family, it must be remembered that family is one. Mutual support in any situation is what will hold the marriage together stronger than records in the registry office.
Let one of the spouses make a mistake at work, and now he faces a long trial involving management and representatives of the head office from another country. Or the family was overtaken by a common misfortune that could have been prevented by taking precautions. All this should not deprive the spouses of unconditional support for each other. Whatever happens, a husband or wife should know that they will be accepted at home and understood in any situation.