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In mid-August, the 19-month online weight loss marathon “Light Harmony” ended. Minus 800 kg XNUMX g for four – this is the result. Not so much? Woman’s Day found out why the organizers of the marathon consider the result to be very good.
7 activities aimed at identifying the causes of weight gain, useful tricks to achieve the desired result, working with goals and recommendations for maintaining what has been achieved. Chelyabinsk psychologist Olesya Garifulina and her Moscow colleague Natalya Finogenova summed up the results of the marathon and found 8 reasons why even the most effective diet will not be as useful as a psychological approach to solving the issue of excess weight.
How the authors of the marathon did it
The organizers of the marathon have experienced all the vicissitudes of losing weight in the usual sense: they went through tough diets, exercise, experienced breakdowns and kickbacks. And so we know how difficult it can be to cope with this problem on our own.
Olesya:
“75 kg with a height of 174 cm is not a critical figure, but I did not like the reflection in the mirror. I didn’t fit into my favorite clothes and only photographed my face on the beach. I lost weight through a typical mistake: once I exercise, then I can eat what I want. But it was with the adjustment of the power supply that the changes began. I changed shaping to strength training and counted calories, kept a food diary, from which it became clear that “I don’t eat anything” – an illusion.
I stopped counting calories when I already knew which foods are good for me and which ones are not very good. Now I eat what is useful, even when I am hungry. And if I notice that I am eating up sadness or anticipation, then I start chewing slowly, slowly and thus I eat much less. “
Natalia:
“I effectively sat on tough hunger strikes – a month on buckwheat, a long hunger to dizziness, reduced 12 kg in a month and was happy about it. For a while she kept the weight, then he returned, despite the physical exertion. I did not understand the reasons for gaining weight and lost weight by willpower. And when I began to understand with the help of psychology, I understood my reason: I learned where and how to get support, except in desserts, and – by and large a secret – that you can be happy in any weight. “
1. You are asking yourself the wrong question.
While you are looking for the answer to the question “Why am I not losing weight?”, There will be no result. Ask yourself: why do I need this? How will my life change when I lose weight? Why do I need a dream figure? What kind of woman will I become with such a figure?
The goal should be such that it pulls you, like the planets of the solar system to the Sun. If you lose weight for the company or “so it is necessary” – the result will be short. It’s like pulling out only the top of the weed, and leaving the root – it will then fill the entire garden with itself. The body must know why it jumps and does push-ups and refuses the chocolate cake for the sake of it? What will be the reward for this suffering?
As soon as you find your answer to the question “Why?”, You will reduce both the weight and the likelihood of returning the lost kilograms.
Irina T., 37 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– I was on diets and starving. I started the morning by looking at photos of bikini models in the Instagram feed. I wanted to be like them: with a flat stomach, abs and long legs. I dreamed of ham, but I ate egg white and dry bread and drank only water. And only when I realized that after the birth of two children and at my age of 37 I would hardly be able to pull myself into a “bikinash”, I went to a psychologist, where I was able to formulate my goal – to be physically healthy and just like myself in the mirror. I bought the coveted ham, ate a piece and calmed down, it seems, for good – it turned out to be tasteless. And the weight really went away, despite the butter roll for breakfast.
Psychologists view a person as a system of thoughts, feelings and actions. Positive changes in life and appearance are influenced by all three components.
Let’s say the goal is to lose weight and fit into your dream dress (you even know why you need it). You think in this direction, joyfully anticipate the result – that’s great. But if at the same time you continue to eat fast food, then the goal of losing weight will not be achieved. Are your actions helping you achieve your goal?
Weight goes away when you stop holding it – let go of your “thick” thoughts, and the weight goes away by itself.
Olga M., 35 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– I started a fight with excess weight many times: I wanted to please my men more. It so happened that my relationship with a man in great weight began, and then I began to “take care of myself” for him. True, none of them was happy about my diet – one teased, the other argued, the third cursed. And when I reached the ideal, in my opinion, weight, our relationship deteriorated and in the end we parted. I went into depression, I started to eat everything (and for whom should I be slim?), Then I met a new man and everything started all over again. Until I realized that this is a vicious circle.
Coincidentally, when I met my future husband and I was drawn to a diet, I already suspected that he would not support me. And he simply told me that if I want to mock my body, then he is not my assistant in this, but he will not stop me either. My ardor has disappeared somewhere. And then I came to weight loss training with a psychological bias. There I found out that with the help of diets I attracted increased attention of my men and thus wanted to earn their approval. As soon as I realized this, I lost interest in constant diets. For the first time I wanted to go to a sports club for myself.
Over time, the weight has dropped effortlessly – through pleasure. I no longer have to force myself to starve and drag myself to the gym. I learned to get my husband’s attention directly, and not through refutation of my thoughts that I was fat.
3. You are more concerned with someone else’s life than yours.
In our practice, we have noticed that overweight clients are very fond of dealing with the problems and concerns of others.
It’s really scary to take care of your life – out of habit. It is much easier to work more or to file a report for a colleague – you may not even be asked, you have already done everything. It is very easy and habitual to do their work for other adults. This lends weight to their eyes. Well, or so it seems to you.
What is energy? Everything we spend: calories, action at work, and focus on solving any problem. Look at your life through energy costs – where do you spend it? How often do you adjust to the desires of your loved ones or colleagues to the detriment of your interests and plans?
If you spent it, you need to replenish it, this is how the body works: it strives for balance. The easiest way to recharge is to eat. The catch is that when you take on someone else’s life more than your own, you start as two. In the best case, you will maintain the existing weight, in the worst case, you will gain. Harmony – when you take care of your life, and according to your needs you participate in someone else’s.
Maria S., 52 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– I went with my son to the rector, when he was almost expelled from the university, then I went to interviews, getting a job. And then my son once says in SMS: enough, I’m ashamed. And he sends next anecdote about a Jewish mother: “Son, let’s go home. – I am hungry? “No, you’re cold.”
And when I could – with the help of great willpower and tears! – to refrain from further super-help to my son, I began to lose weight. Practically doing nothing.
It seems a paradox, but our body is very wise and will not give up its own. Especially if he is not given anything more worthwhile in return. Overweight is a kind of protection from the attention of the opposite sex, rejection, shame for failure and stress.
A fat person is usually responsive and rarely refuses – so that he is not considered bad. It seems to him that they love him for his super-responsiveness, and if you stop pleasing, they will turn away from him. And then the easiest way to be visible is to be big.
Weight loss starts with taking care of yourself.
Loss of a job or home, family or savings are all examples of negative stress. It becomes impossible to admit your mistakes and mistakes, and the body starts a process that allows a person to look meaningful. And behind the weighty appearance, pain, vulnerability and disappointment are hidden. The flip side of this coin is when life losses were accompanied by weight loss (for example, a serious illness in you or your loved ones, death, job loss, etc.). The body remembers all this and does not allow you to lose weight again for any price. It works according to the formula: weight loss leads to losses in all other areas of life.
Also in the hidden reasons for weight gain are unexpressed emotions and feelings of sadness, resentment or anger seized by croissants.
Weight loss starts with taking care of yourself. At the nutritional level, this means feeding yourself wholesome, healthy foods. Emotionally, allowing yourself to express your feelings as they arise.
Anna A., 41 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– I worked as a cashier, there was a shortage. And although at that time my finances were singing romances, I had to return the entire amount. There is not much money left for food, for half a year I was almost starving, but I managed to gain weight. As the situation improved, my weight dropped. There were several such financial losses, and with each new incident of stress, my weight grew faster and decreased more slowly. I lost weight on diets and did not associate a set of kilograms with events in my life. Everything changed when, at a meeting with a psychologist, I found out that my body does not want to let go of excess weight, since its reduction is tightly connected with troubles. And the body stubbornly holds the weight to stay comfortable. We started to unravel the weight loss process and work with the loss of money. After three months of work, the body gradually began to release excess.
I could not have thought before how many interesting things are hidden behind the problem of excess weight. I learned to listen to the signals of the body and continue all the practices that I learned in working with a psychologist.
5. You sleep little, drink little, and eat very little
A person needs 7-8 hours of sleep, up to 2 liters of water and a sufficient amount of micro- and macronutrients to cover daily expenses. Add to this physical activity to maintain muscle tone – here is a recipe that will help you, practically without changing the diet, to lose weight. Sleep well, drink clean water and eat fractionally.
Gulnaz Sh., 29 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– Children’s portions, do not eat after six and do not salt. So I restored my figure after childbirth. And once a week I studied at home for 20 minutes. Who would have told me then that you need to lean on vegetables and fruits and move more, eat what you like in the first half of the day, and the healthiest food in the second, I would not have believed. But the example of my friend, with whom we walked with the kids, turned out to be the best advertisement. As for sleep, there is still something to work on – with a 1,5-year-old son, you can’t sleep much, but 20 minutes in the afternoon is my sacred time!
For short-term and rapid weight loss, rigid diets are very effective. But for some reason it is forgotten that they gained weight for several months or years, and they want to change it in a couple of weeks.
What is diet? This is a shortage of food. Deficiency slows down the metabolism, that is, the body goes into “sleep mode” and it becomes normal to consume a small amount of calories. The one that’s enough to survive. After finishing the diet, you naturally increase the number of calories, and this difference is sent to the reserve.
Go to your dream of losing weight and enjoy the process. And the body will certainly pull itself up to inner sensations.
Svetlana T., 43 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– I am a very strong woman, and this is not only my opinion. This is what my friends, colleagues and relatives say about me. I lost weight often and successfully with the help of different diets. True, not for long, for a year and a half maximum. Then the weight returned smoothly and imperceptibly. And I started all over again.
As I got older, I began to notice that diets work worse, and more effort is required. Dizziness, nausea, weakness, etc. began to appear. But when I regained my ideal weight, the admiration of my friends, men, colleagues, sisters redeemed my suffering a hundredfold. They sincerely admired my willpower, and I bathed in their attention! But the enthusiasm and praise gradually subsided – people quickly get used to you, both beautiful and fat. They stopped paying attention to my beautiful body and gradually I gained my kg again. I had to go to a psychologist when my willpower refused and I went into a total jam. I felt like a full turkey, but I continued to eat. Imagine my surprise when we found out that the results of diets help me to acutely feel the admiration and well-deserved compliments of others.
As soon as I realized this, I gave up bullying myself. Now I am consistently at a weight that is 3 kg more than ideal. But I admire my reflection in the mirror. The bonus is that my loved ones, it turns out, appreciate and admire not only my beautiful body, but also my spiritual qualities. I didn’t notice this before.
Who is the dearest and closest person to each of us? Yes, we ourselves! And when I have me, then I can take care of myself, because I know what I want, I hear my desires, I know my strengths and weaknesses, I know how to satisfy my needs.
The general recommendation is to love yourself. “Loving yourself” is a process. And in order to lose weight seriously and for a long time, be prepared for a long process that requires effort and money.
Ideal weight is not numbers, it is a state of mind. The same balance of thoughts, actions, emotional and physical state, in which it is simply good. Happiness does not depend on kg – it is always within you.
Elena Yu., 33 years old, Chelyabinsk:
– In matters of weight loss, I always dreamed that there would be such a specialist who would take me hard, and the weight would disappear by itself every day. And I will just watch the process … I will suffer, starve, limit myself with fears of inhibitions. The psychological approach helped to understand that only you yourself and your attitude change everything. That the process is not painful at all, but very interesting – you learn so much about yourself when you yourself are attentive to your own person (and not trying to impress your mentor).
Secondly, the process of losing weight works without a feeling of guilt and with breakdowns in gluttony! That losing weight is not a limitation, but variety and nutrition, that this is a movement, and not an imitation of it, that it is suddenly a pleasant process and forever, and not a short stretch of the road with pangs of conscience. And finally … this is your handiwork with great love for yourself and respect!