On one of the news forums, the girl wrote a post about a quarrel with her mother. It seems nothing unusual, because everyone knows how difficult the relationship between parents and children can be. But when it comes to family secrets, passions can escalate to the limit.
This story happened to a 24-year-old American woman. From childhood, she was very different in appearance from the rest of the family and wondered why it happened. It turned out that at one time the mother started an affair on the side and gave birth to a second child not from her husband.
The girl found out about this when she turned 17: her mother introduced her to her biological father, as she “felt that her daughter was old enough to know the truth.” The «new» father was not going to take part in the life of his newfound daughter, and the mother made the girl promise that she would not tell her older sister anything about what had happened. But the secret was kept only for a few years.
Two months ago, the older sister showed the girl a photo of herself with a new boyfriend. It turned out to be … the same biological father. Leaving herself a couple of days to think, the American nevertheless decided that she should tell her sister the truth. For the girl in love, the news turned out to be a shock, but she broke off relations with her partner without condemning her sister’s act — and why was she angry with her?
But their common mother found a reason for rage. “She says that I revealed a secret that did not belong to me, and I had no right to tell anyone about it,” the girl shared. — In her opinion, since this man is only my biological father, it does not matter that he and his sister meet. Moreover, there was no talk of marriage yet. ”
And although two months have passed, the woman is still angry — because of this, her youngest daughter began to feel guilty. She used to think she did the right thing, but now she thinks she did something terrible. In search of advice, the girl wrote an anonymous post on the forum, which collected more than 2000 responses. Most of them contain words of encouragement.
So, one user noted that the mother’s romance had an impact on the girl’s whole life, so this is absolutely “her business”. He pointed to something else: “I find it hard to believe that the biological father did not know anything. Rather, he decided to try a relationship with a younger «version» of his old love. It’s disgusting and your sister deserves to know the truth.»
Among the messages were questions about the motives of the mother: “What would happen if your sister took this man more seriously? What if she started bringing him to family dinners? It would definitely cause some embarrassment. Mom clearly didn’t think things through very well.”
Not every family keeps such a secret, but situations where the “victim” finds himself in the position of the guilty one are not uncommon. In this story, the mother shifted to her daughter the responsibility for the situation that she herself created. She redirected her own excitement and, perhaps, shame to the girl, covering them with the message “you are to blame for this.”
It is difficult not to succumb to such manipulations and pressure, but it is real — with the support of those who see what is happening from the outside.