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A strong fear of the unpredictability of life limits many of us, preventing us from developing and fulfilling our dreams. Physician Lisa Rankin suggests that we consciously and carefully move from anxiety to acceptance of the impermanence of life in order to see the opportunities that open up before us.
Life can be perceived as a minefield, a labyrinth, around every turn of which lies danger. Or you can consider it a broad road that will one day take us from fear of the unpredictable to a willingness to trust fate, says Lisa Rankin, a physician and researcher of the interaction of science, mental health and human development. “I have spoken to many people about what spiritual development has given them. It turned out that for each, the most important was his personal journey from fear to freedom, the final point of which is the right relationship with the unknown, ”she writes.
Lisa Rankin divides this path into five stages. Their description can be regarded as a kind of map that helps to lay the most convenient route for you personally — the route from fear to freedom.
1.Unconscious fear of the unknown
I stay in my comfort zone and avoid uncertainty at all costs. The unfamiliar seems dangerous to me. I am not even aware of how uncomfortable this makes me, and I will not approach the area of the unknown. I don’t take action if the outcome is unpredictable. I spend a lot of energy avoiding risk.
Credo: «Better to be safe than sorry.»
Navigation: Try to realize how your desire for absolute certainty limits freedom. Ask yourself: “Is this right for me? Am I really safe if I stay in my comfort zone?
2. Conscious fear of the unknown
The unknown seems dangerous to me, but I am soberly aware of it. Uncertainty provokes anxiety, anxiety and fear in me. Because of this, I try to avoid such situations and try to control my world. But even though I prefer certainty, I realize that this is holding me back. I resist the unknown, but I realize that adventure is impossible in this situation.
Credo: «The only certain thing in life is its uncertainty.»
Navigation: Be gentle with yourself, don’t scold yourself for the fact that the fear of the unpredictability of life limits your opportunities. You have already shown your courage by admitting this. Only out of deep compassion for yourself can you move on to the next stage.
3.On the verge of uncertainty
I don’t know if uncertainty is dangerous, and it’s not easy for me, but I don’t resist it. The unknown doesn’t scare me that much, but I’m in no hurry to meet it either. Little by little, I begin to feel the freedom that comes with uncertainty, and I allow myself cautious curiosity (although the voice of fear still sounds in my head).
Credo: «The unknown is interesting, but I have my own concerns.»
Navigation: Ask. Keep your mind open. Be curious. Resist the temptation to come up with artificial «certainty» to remove the discomfort you still feel when confronted with the unknown. At this stage, there is a risk that your desire for lulling predictability will lead you to fear. For now, you can just stand on the threshold of uncertainty and, if possible, protect your inner peace and create comfort for yourself.
4. The temptation of the unknown
Not only am I not afraid of uncertainty, but I also feel its attraction. I understand how much interesting things are ahead — what I don’t know yet. The only way to know is to rely on the unknown and explore it. The uncertain and unknown no longer frightens me, but rather beckons. Potential discoveries excite me much more than certainties, and I become so involved in this process that I risk becoming reckless. Uncertainty attracts, and sometimes I even lose my sanity. Therefore, with all my readiness to discover something new, I need to remember the danger of being on the opposite edge of the unknown.
Credo: «The other side of fear of the unknown is dizziness with possibilities.»
Navigation: The main thing at this stage is common sense. When the craving for the unknown is irresistible, there is a temptation to dive into it with your eyes closed. But this can lead to trouble. The complete absence of fear in the face of uncertainty is recklessness. At this stage, it is important to take steps into the unknown, setting reasonable limits for yourself, dictated not by fear, but by wisdom and intuition.
5. Dive
I don’t know, but I trust. The unknown doesn’t scare me, but it doesn’t tempt me either. I have enough common sense. There are many things in life that are inaccessible to my understanding, but I believe that moving in this direction is still safe enough. Here, both good and bad can happen to me. In any case, I believe that everything has a meaning, even if it is not yet known to me. Therefore, I am simply open to new things and value such freedom more than limiting certainty.
Credo: “The only way to feel the diversity of life is to dive into its unknown.”
Navigation: Enjoy! This is a wonderful state, but it will not work to stay in it all the time. It will take constant practice, because from time to time we are all «thrown» back to the fear of the unknown. Remind yourself to trust life and the invisible forces that guide you in ways that seem incomprehensible for the time being.
“Remember that the path through these five stages is not always linear. You can be thrown back or forward, and loss or injury can turn into a regression, ”adds Lisa Rankin. In addition, in different areas of life, we can be at different stages. For example, we are tempted by the unknown at work and at the same time we are aware of our fear of leaving the comfort zone in personal relationships. «Don’t judge yourself for who you are! There is no “right” or “wrong” stage – trust yourself and give yourself time to change.”
Sometimes it can be very helpful to understand where we are, but not to judge what else we are “not good enough at.” Marking «I’m here» on this map will help us walk the path from fear to freedom at our own pace. This movement is impossible without compassion and self-care. “Trust the process with patience and self-love. Wherever you are, you are already in the right place.”
About the Author: Lisa Rankin is a physician and best-selling author of Healing Fear: Building Courage for a Healthy Body, Mind, and Soul, and other books.