Frankly, we often force children to do what they absolutely do not want to do. And if in some cases this is completely justified, we are fighting with amazing childish laziness and carelessness, then in others it becomes a terrible mistake. How to distinguish one from the other, we figure it out together with the psychologist Ekaterina Makarova.
Adults want the child to be obedient, not to cause problems and at the same time to form as a full-fledged personality. However, the first two points often contradict the third. The psychologist has compiled for healthy-food-near-me.com a list of things that cannot be forcibly forced to do a child.
1. Be the best
It is clear that adults want their child to be at the forefront. For example, I would become a leader, a champion, in general, would be in the spotlight. Such a person should be strong, strong-willed and be able to boldly express his point of view. But if your baby is timid and shy, you do not need to try to force him to communicate with everyone and forcibly build leadership relationships in the kindergarten or class. Let him first show his insecurity and understand how he himself relates to this.
2. Asking for forgiveness
The child needs to be explained everything! He shouldn’t do anything just because the parent said so. Often, well-meaning grandmothers try to familiarize the child with moral norms from an early age. For example, they force the child to ask for forgiveness because of any oversight. Constant urging will definitely be assigned to the child. He may develop unjustified feelings of guilt and detachment, the feeling that he is doing everything wrong.
3. Greet
Of course, greeting a person is the first rule of courtesy. However, it is better not to do this with strangers. Otherwise, they will realize that the baby is talkative and you can find out anything from him. This can only work in favor of the scammers!
4. Communicate
Communication is one of the main ways of adequate communication. If you see that the child does not have contact with a neighbor’s girl, then do not force him to be friends with her. After all, the kid is looking for like-minded people: those who believe in his little world. When a child is forced to impose a company with which he does not find a common language, children may begin to tease or humiliate him (because they do not realize what they are doing), which leads to the formation of low self-esteem and problems in adolescence.
5. Cheat
If for some reason ask your child to lie for good, he may take it for granted. Then the child will begin to deceive you and others, the lie easily develops into a habit.
6. Have lunch
Many adults see it as their primary responsibility to feed a child, even when he is not hungry. Parents or grandmothers are trying to put pressure on the baby: they say, you have to eat, otherwise you will not grow up. He can perceive such horror stories in the literal sense and begin to eat as if not into himself. This can lead to a violation of eating behavior, metabolism, further obesity, and even neurosis.
7. Throw away the toy
It often happens that a child gets used to one toy and does not part with it for a long time. The parent is trying by any means to save him from the battered bear and buy a new one. However, the kid with tears flatly refuses to change his beloved plush pet for a soft stranger. Do not try to remove the toy by force or trick! When he discovers the loss, it will be a blow and betrayal for him.
8. Eat this or that food
If your child has allergies or metabolic problems, then do not try to snatch the forbidden product from him. He will still look for him in all the closets. When he finds it, he will surely enjoy it. The forbidden fruit is sweet, remember? It is best to gently explain that such food makes him bad, so he does not need to eat it. And, of course, do not keep junk food at home and do not eat it with a child.
9. Sleep in a dark room
Everyone knows that a child is afraid of the dark. If you are trying to force him to sleep without light, this is a severe psychological trauma for him. He will feel in danger. After that, the baby will definitely not trust you.
10. Release your parents’ dreams
If you have not been able to become either an actor or a skater, then do not try to make your dreams come true as a child. These are just your problems! Of course, while he is small and does not really understand anything, he can be given to dancing, swimming or skating. Through bickering, persuasion, frequent classes and a desire to please parents, he will achieve success. But when he grows up, he may not thank you for it. Maybe he wanted to become an artist? We must accept the fact that a child is not your property, but a small person with his own inclinations and desires. And this must be respected in him!