Dear girls, the process of falling in love must be approached thoroughly! And from the very first step, make attempts to strike on the spot men who are theoretically suitable for a relationship. And not when they themselves fell head over heels in love and, finally, plucked up the courage to attract the attention of the hero, who, for some reason, until that time, had been poorly attracted. The girl was too inert, lethargic, she waited too much for her such a special, snow queen to be noticed by themselves and lose their heads. While she was fantasizing like that, an energetic, bright, cheerful man himself blew her roof, while not being carried away by her! It’s sad… It’s even sadder when a girl who is already head over heels in love starts trying to charm her hero. Feelings burn and make her act — obliquely, crookedly, inefficiently, sticky and intrusive. Lovers become stupid, they have poor feedback from reality, many illusions, fantasies about attributing their own feelings to the object of sighing — joy, pleasure, excitement from communication.
Choking with passion and does not know how to attract his attention, only she. The hero is calm. And in order to kindle it, you will need to work very, very hard, which is not possible for everyone. Especially for those who are used to living in an energy-saving mode.
Therefore, dear girls, I propose to create the ground for charm immediately, from the very first moment, as soon as you go out into the world. Carpet bombardment with energy is everything. And they themselves are always in good shape, and the choice is rich.
So, if you want to be as attractive as possible and have the opportunity to choose, then you never appear anywhere with a sour face, you are always sunny and open towards everyone: the maximum flow of goodwill — your calling card — knocks anyone who gets into this flow!
The warm luminous face instantly attracts people. But for a long time the hero keeps close to you, binds, increases interest in you — your falling into his sexual ideal, your exclusive attitude towards him, as well as his own feeling that you are his equal.
See video blog E.V. Goncharova on youtube
How is it possible to present all this? As for the sexual ideal, study the preferences of the age group of men you desire. Fortunately, now with an abundance of social networks, you can see which photos and from whom collect the maximum number of likes.
By the way, how successful are your photos? Do not use? Well then, what kind of formation of a strong feeling can we talk about if you have not yet learned to attract even the initial interest? Do not rely on chance, hone your external Image! Fortunately, now there are plenty of videos on YouTube both on the topic of make-up and on the topic of style. External dullness in love is not help, but only an obstacle! And no proactive and strategically adjusted behavior against the background of your fading will work, because for some reason you already merged your proactivity at the very first step.
The postulate about the importance of female appearance is unchanged, television continuously shoots films with beauties in the lead roles. And very often the heroines do not become beauties immediately, but their personal life improves only after this fateful step — the creation of their dazzling Image! In general, the mass media are working hard on this idea: girls, put yourself in order! I agree with them. The current cosmetics is such that any of us can be a dazzling beauty! I hope I persuaded you to create your most beautiful portrait? Fine!
Goodwill to everyone, within a radius of three kilometers from you, available!? So, external beauty will not leave anyone indifferent!
But only this is not enough to thoroughly “demolish the roof” for someone and give an impetus to active courtship. You should have one more weapon in your arsenal — a narrowly directed stream of your charm should come from you exactly to the one you obviously liked the most: charm is the ability to make a person feel his incredible peculiarity, transcendent exclusivity in your eyes.
Feel free to express feelings, deep interest and affection! Do not think that arrogance and inaccessibility can ignite someone. These qualities are by no means synonymous with a sense of female dignity, as some ladies naively believe. According to these qualities, boring, boring and cold persons, frigid herrings, in a word, are more identified by men. Therefore, be open in your emotions of admiration, show that you are fascinated by his personality. And he will respond to your heat. If — if he sees that you are his equal: in intelligence, in social status, in your approach to life. We all need heat not from just anyone.
Anna Izmailova. A shocking change in appearance.
download video
And how will he see it? In conversation! Do you have something to tell? Are you able to captivate emotionally with your story? You must do this in the very first minutes of your communication! Yes, this is the best time for Cupid’s arrows to hit the target. No wonder they always talk about falling in love at first sight. This has its own truth. It is more accurate in the fact that falling in love occurs during those first hours when they parted with you … and you still don’t get out and don’t get out of your head …
When does a girl not get out of her head after the first communication? When it was so great with her, so interesting, and … it’s not completely clear — but there will be a sequel: did I already like it a lot or just a little? And now the heart of the hero trembles and trembles from these guesses …
You know how, while talking, to smile in such a way as to give hope, but … completely, ahead of time, not to clothe with confidence? Learn.
Never rush to give a man full confidence in your feelings. Let’s give hope … And let’s give feelings on your part — bright, contagious, but the confidence that he has already «blew your head off completely and irrevocably» — no, don’t! Otherwise, he will not have time to fall in love with you. We fall in love not during communication, but during parting and reflection on the topic — will there be a continuation or not? Am I already fascinated or not? Premature confidence does not contribute to such thoughts and desires. Just like coldness does not help either. You need to be hot, but not assigned ahead of time.
And how to do it? To do this, you need to be able to feel and pause that moment — when a man, based only on your warm look, suddenly begins to make decisions for both of you! For example, he decided to hug you. Yes, you want the same… But did he ask you? Have you already allowed? Yes, a real man does not ask))) But a real woman is in no hurry to surrender territories that do not yet belong to him. So it’s best to pause for now and say, «You didn’t ask permission.» To put it mildly, warmly … He will ask, say: “For now, I don’t allow it.” But there must be a promise in the look! Heat!
Girls, what happens in this dialogue? You, for now, do not give a man your rights to decisions that may well be different from his. You encourage, provoke him, but you force him to negotiate with you. For a man, this is a challenge. How come, aren’t we one? Not yet)))))
Challenge breeds excitement. It makes you fall in love: if the young lady is so interesting that you want to overcome obstacles. If it is not interesting, then the obstacles will not be overcome. Well, thank God, you will stay safer, you will not fall into an affair with someone who does not plan to fall in love with you.
But it can be even more offensive: the young lady is interesting, she had all the chances, but she couldn’t fall in love, she very quickly allowed to appropriate the rights to herself. Girls, I draw your attention: not to let yourself be appropriated does not mean being cold, it means denoting your voice (very softly, warmly) and the obligatory need to reckon with it.
Yes, yes, there is such a thing in male nature: everything that a man likes, he wants to appropriate it. But if he appropriates without the slightest difficulty and with a swoop, then no big emotional trace from this appropriation arises in his soul. But if you have to work hard, then strong feelings and a vivid unforgettable romance arise, the ground is created for long-term relationships.
Men are very well aware of this peculiarity of theirs — be sure to capture, and at the same time not those who actively surrendered themselves. They do not like quick victories: there are no strong emotions. And men are looking for emotions, looking for women who can give strong emotions.
Girls sometimes think that men can receive emotions from them only because of the gender difference. Once — and a sexual attraction arose, two — and a stream of emotions began. Alas … this happens only with very young and very hot men. Older men are no longer so quickly ignited simply by the female sex. Especially on cold blocks of ice or Velcro in love.
Only a woman who respects men and respects herself can ignite a strong experienced man. Respects his rights, his human separateness, but also his rights, his human separateness. And with such a woman, it is not so easy to unite their territories and get the right to make a decision on them for two. A man must earn in order to have the right to make decisions for her.
Please note that we, women, do not seek to win back from a man the right to make decisions for him. And men in communication with women they like tend to do it very quickly. And here, no matter how flattering it is for us (yes, we understand that this is the maximum sign of attention), we cannot allow a man to seize rights in the common territory by leaps and bounds. This should happen gradually and by mutual agreement.
A man must want to take over the entire territory. Otherwise, this means that he did not fall in love and will not fall in love, unfortunately. A girl should not transfer rights for cheap. Let the man prove that he is worthy.
Dear girls, be careful in this matter. Otherwise, you will find yourself in relationships with those who are not in love with you enough. This will not bring happiness to you or men. Make sure that both you and he are happy, consciously track the entire dynamics of your relationship. If you see a failure, you need to correct, you need to introduce steps into your relationship based on reason, and not just feelings.
In our female nature, this is sewn at the level of instinct — to surrender, to submit, to dissolve. But love is the prerogative of the higher spheres of the mind, which means that in order to achieve it, you need to include a conscious approach. Consciously — this is understanding exactly what you are doing and why, what result you plan to see. And then, if you do everything right, there will be a man next to you who will be in love with you.
Or — you calmly let go of the one who did not find the strength in himself to overcome some obstacles. Didn’t find it, didn’t find it. Let go with God, don’t cling. All is not lost: in communication with the next you can light someone stronger. After all, experience is everything. And female experience is not forged in beds, but in these first hours, days — you will be able to fall in love by laying the right format, then you will get the most ideal lover in bed, the happiest and hottest. And if you can’t, you won’t charm with any somersaults. Moreover, there are no somersaults in magical and unforgettable sex, but there is only love, hot and passionate love, from which any touch seems magical.
Did you notice another clue? A woman does not bind a man with sex, with love. It is a man who binds a woman with sex: he appropriates and makes his own, starts a more serious attitude towards himself on her part.
Therefore, do not rush to be appropriated, you will always have time. First, fall in love.
And remember, if a man is in love, he wants to take control of your life. Remember? Once again, do not rush to give up this control.
And — when you give it back (and this is right, control given in time binds just as strongly as held), then, anyway, don’t give it all! This, by the way, directly follows from the rule of reciprocity, that you need to give control symmetrically: he knows the full schedule of each of your days, and you know; he knows your close friends and you know; he knows what you do on a business trip, and you know; etc. Such interpenetration can be called some kind of control, or it could be better called complicity, interpenetration. To strengthen the relationship in a couple, you will need to carefully look at how this mutual complicity is carried out, whether it enriches or cuts.
But this is a topic for another article about the next stage in the relationship. While we are discussing the initial stage — a strong love.
If a man does not seek to control everything that happens in your life, if he is a «democrat», then he is not in love with you enough. We have already learned this! Right?
A balanced, self-controlled man will carefully take the levers of power into his hands, but he will do it anyway. Men have such a nature — to take care of their loved ones as much as possible, to patronize, to solve all their problems. And if there are few levers of power in the hands, there are many female unpredictability, then it is impossible to carry out quality care. Failures occur. This causes discomfort in the male soul. Therefore, a strong man, striving for custody, will actively strive for balance — he will become the head of the pair, the person who makes the most decisions.
This is the most beautiful masculine quality, to take everything under your control, and it is especially characteristic of accomplished men. It should not be fought with, it should be used to strengthen relationships. How to do this at the initial stage of a relationship, how it contributes to falling in love, I told you in detail. Enjoy.
Video from Yana Shchastya: interview with professor of psychology N.I. Kozlov
Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be in order to successfully marry? How many times do men get married? Why are there so few normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A story that couldn’t be better. Paying for the opportunity to be close to a beautiful woman.