If some claim to be sex addict to justify their urges, sex addiction can be a real mental disorder. Compulsive masturbation, recourse to online sex, adultery … the consequences on a personal level and in the couple are often harmful. Fortunately, it is possible to cure a sex addiction.

Claiming to be a sex addict is a common boast among both men and women. A disproportionate sexual appetite can indeed be considered as proof of virility or assumed femininity, making the lovers proud who pride themselves on it. Another unwarranted recourse to sex addiction, some use it as an excuse to justify reprehensible behavior. Beyond the well-known political scandals that are the DSK or the “Monicagate” affair, men sometimes plead sex addiction to their partner to solicit more frequent reports, and sometimes even to excuse infidelity.

But in truth, sex addiction can represent more than a fantasy: the recognized sex addict has a permanent, irrepressible and excessive need for sex in any form whatsoever. He consumes sex on a daily basis and by all means: pornographic videos, masturbation, intercourse with multiple partners, erotic thoughts or even evocative words. His sex addiction, moreover, manifests itself everywhere, especially at work, and on a daily basis. Unlike the one who misuses it, the sex addict feels real shame – even guilt – in this compulsive behavior.

If sex addiction is not quantifiable and therefore difficult to identify – and to distinguish sexual urges from the order of normality – medicine to date recognizes sex addiction as a real pathology, like alcoholism or any other type of addiction. 

More than just a desire, the sex addict has a compulsive need for sex. This is materialized by an increased dependence on cybersex, an inordinate frequency of masturbation, the need to increase the number of sexual partners or even a frantic consultation of porn movies. The addiction to sex pushes men or women to focus their daily lives on sex. ‘satisfaction of his impulses, to the detriment of his professional and family life and of his couple. His quest for sex at any cost takes precedence over the rest, which he gradually neglects, often with disastrous effects.

For many reasons, sex addiction is a danger for the couple. The sex addict does nothing but consume sex, which becomes commonplace and loses its original purpose – to share a privileged moment of intimacy: the couple no longer considers their relations under the sign of sexual pleasure and love. In addition, the partner with sex addiction is very demanding, and the other fails to keep pace. This is why most people affected by a sex addiction cheat on their partner, as adultery can lead to the couple breaking up. But the most unfavorable outcome, both for the sex addict on a personal level and for lovers in their life together, is the hypothesis in which addiction leads to depression. 

To cure sex addiction, it is first essential to become aware of your addiction and to dare to admit it. This is arguably the most difficult step on the road to recovery, as most sex addicts are in denial.

Support groups exist to promote the admission of a sex addiction. By exchanging with others, the sex addict realizes that he is not alone and the shame he feels diminishes. Once the disorder has been identified, it is possible to approach your general practitioner who can refer the patient to a specialized therapist – psychiatrist or psychoanalyst in particular. If no drug treatment exists to date, different techniques allow the sex addict to gradually break away from his sex addiction. In case of depression, he may also have recourse to antidepressants.