Psychology What you need from others to be better

Psychology What you need from others to be better

In the book «Head, heart and hands» the author Álvaro González Alorda talks about how to undertake a journey towards our personal development

Psychology What you need from others to be better

There are times when having a clear idea is not enough. Even if we get to feel it, we may not get it. Until it materializes, until it flows through us and escapes through our fingertips, it does not come true. From this thought (thesis, theory …) is born “Head, heart and hands”, the new book by Álvaro González Alorda, a professor specialized in the transformation of organizations.

But with the book what he seeks is not the transformation of an organization, but the personal transformation. “To your head it seems reasonable, to your heart desirable, but it is difficult for you to lower it to your hands.” This is the phrase of the book that the author points out as a summary of his thesis, because for him personal transformation has to reach “our hands” to be tangible, and this is a step that is often difficult for us.

«We work on the intellectual idea, we« lower it to the heart », but it is difficult for us to make it real. Although we believe that we have changed, if it does not “reach our hands” this change is useless, “says González Alorda.

According to the author, the transformation we are talking about, our own, the one that helps us to be better, both at work and personally, is currently based on “academic tourism” and motivational talks, a model that he considers outdated. “We cannot think that we develop by attending a course. Are valuable tools but its impact on our self-development is quite low “, says González Alorda, adding that these tools” give us ideas, concepts and models “but more work has to be done to get a person to” move “.

For a transformation to be truly beneficial, the basis must be the self-knowledge. “We need to be the protagonist of our development, we cannot change if we do not know each other,” says the professor. For this, to recognize the development possibilities that our personality presents, the author comments that we must make a diagnosis of our situation, and for this we need good tools.

The importance of the mentor

A very important figure for this development is that of the mentor. This one, which occupies a very important place in the book – the story is developed from the point of view of Sara, a woman who attends a program of mentoring online– is essential for our progress. «Many of us are part of the« Bridge Generation », the one that has had to face a digital transformation, and to face many of these changes we need help “, explains the author, who also points out that the figure of the mentor is” a person who inspires, offers us energy to move forward and thanks to him, we achieve our achievements faster than if we did. we do alone ».

We find, within everything that helps us to promote and establish our self-development, two fundamental pillars for this. The first is learning to listen. “Paying attention to what others say is essential to be able to have a complete perspective of reality,” says Álvaro González Alorda, who also emphasizes the importance of this “quality”, since dialogue is a fundamental part not only in relationships, but also in our development as people. “When we do not listen, it is easier for conflicts to explode in our faces,” he says.

The “intellectual diet”

The other important point is to have a wide “intellectual diet”, and the professor warns of the risk that this is designed by an algorithm and not by ourselves. “We are in danger that we all have the same intellectual diet. That is why it is very important to have a wide range of readings and formed by ourselves ”, he comments.

To design this “diet”, the author explains that it is important to find a good balance with fiction: “The world of fiction is very interesting, but we must have discipline not only to choose books that help us disconnect, but also books to learn with.

It also emphasizes that, by having a good reading habit, we learn to write, which automatically leads us to think. “This is how we have a deeper understanding of the human being and therefore of ourselves,” he concludes.

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