Personal experience: my mistakes in raising a child

No, of course I did a lot right. I instilled in the child a love of books, gave him a good upbringing, provided a broad outlook. But still, I made too many mistakes. Both in its development and in everyday life. And if I’m still going to give birth to a second one, I will try very hard:

– Do not buy up tons of things for kids. Well, how did I know that they are growing so fast! We only managed to try on some beautiful suits. It’s even scary to think how much money was spent on all this.

– Take the pacifier from the baby as early as possible. The dummy itself is a thing. But not at 2,5-3 years old. And I missed the moment, and then we parted with a fight and hysterics. Falling asleep without her was unrealistic.

– Realize that the child is not the center of the universe. And not to completely adjust your life to his, but, on the contrary, to include him in a part of our world. This baby will adapt to the schedule of the rest of the family, and not everyone else will change their schedules for the sake of the baby.

– Do not be afraid of disease. And don’t feed your child a ton of medicine for every sneeze. At the age of four, the son already knew the names of all his pills, when and what he needed to drink. And if they talk about “terrible diagnoses”, recheck with at least three specialists. And do not worry about trifles.

– Do not buy a baby cot. She, of course, is needed to complete the touching picture. But until 2 and a half years it served only as a warehouse for things and took up space. The son slept with us. And then the child immediately moved to a regular children’s bed.

– Don’t turn the apartment into a toy store. It’s very difficult to make a promise here, but you have to try. 150 almost identical cars is too much. And baby toys generally gathered dust in the corner: the best toys were an old keyboard and an old telephone.

“Don’t be afraid of people.” It seems to me that this was our biggest mistake – we tried not to go anywhere with the child. It seemed to us that he would interfere with those around him, that he himself would be uncomfortable. We thought that when he grows up a little, it will be easier for him to explain the rules of conduct and he will be calmer with us. But they failed. Therefore, now it is unambiguous: to accustom to society immediately.

– Trust and teach self-reliance. A step is just a step. He must descend from it himself. How will he learn if wings flapped over him?

– Give it to the garden early. Not in the nursery, of course, I’m still against it. But three years is just right. At 4,5 it turned out to be a bit late: all the children were already accustomed to discipline, mine was not. It was difficult for him.

– Don’t bury your head in the sand. If you were told at the age of five that your child needs a speech therapy garden, then go and submit documents to the commission, and do not expect that “it will resolve itself.” Will not dissolve! I regret that I did not do it a year earlier, we would have managed to solve many problems.

– To insist on moving closer to us at least one grandmother. Or find a nanny for a few hours a week. For seven years my husband and I went out somewhere together … literally on the fingers of one hand.

– Practice pedagogical complementary foods. In order not to have scandals on the topic “I don’t eat it” later.

– Enroll your child in sports sections as early as possible. This is good for health and for the formation of character. It’s still too late to raise a champion at seven years old. Anyway, physical exercises can be started as early as one year old.

– Be more flexible. Nothing bad will happen if the child misses a nap or sleeps in the car. Or go to bed later. But it was important for me that we were at home by a certain time and go to bed, as expected, by the clock. Because of this, we missed a lot of interesting trips and activities.

– Don’t be obsessed with hygiene. It has long been proven that a child who grows up in sterile conditions is less resistant to attacks by viruses and microbes. Simply because the body is not used to it. So down with ironed diapers, washing floors three times a day, and constant sterilization of nipples and toys.

– Do not interfere with the disassembly of children on the playground. The child must learn to defend his interests himself. If he doesn’t want to share the scapula, you don’t have to go up and persuade him. These are his personal boundaries. But, of course, observe and be ready to resolve the conflict if any arises.

– Appreciate your own health. It takes a lot of strength and energy to raise a person. And where to get them if mom ignores her health?

– Don’t try to be the perfect mom. I am still very far from pictures from the Internet. And I have already earned a neurosis on these comparisons.

– Reading books. Yes, from birth. Yes, non-stop. Yes, even instead of walking. I consider this to be my greatest achievement and the right action.

– Joint sleep… Comfortable, calm, no nerves. No one slept with mom and dad until they came of age. So I don’t think this is a problem.

– Long breastfeeding. Up to a year and a half for sure. I think this is useful for the child from a psychological point of view.

– Mode. For children, especially hyperactive ones, it is vital. Small exceptions are possible, but in general the child should know when to sleep, when to eat, when to walk, when to do homework.

– Paid medicine. My son and I were at the state clinic three times. No more foot. Yes, it’s expensive. But health and nerves (mine) are more expensive.

– Walking on the balcony. I don’t think traveling with a stroller along the roads globally is better than a restful sleep at the 13th floor, where there are no fumes.

– Gadgets. Yes, I am the mother who only welcomes technical progress. By the way, educational programs on tablets are just a miracle. Checked on the son.