New codes of male beauty

“About ten years ago I was visiting a married couple in France,” recalls 40-year-old Sergei. – In their bathroom, I noticed a solid amount of all sorts of jars of creams: I was struck by the fact that some of them belonged to the owner, not the hostess. I didn’t even know how to react to it. I remember this case because I recently realized how my own attitude towards this topic has changed. Now I have a face cream, a mask to eliminate oily sheen and a hand cream. And if my wife buys the first two funds for me, then I try to follow my hands on my own.

These words of Sergey could be repeated by many men. Today, they can be found chatting with style consultants in clothing stores, for whom cosmetic companies produce special lines of men’s skin care products. And the popularity of this care is growing: for example, in Russia last year, Biotherm Homme men’s products were bought 25% more actively than in 2009, and one of the bestsellers was a skin moisturizer, not shaving cream *. Men-oriented beauty salons and spas, after their “debuts” in European countries and the USA, began to appear in Russia as well – and no one is surprised by a man who signed up for eyebrow correction or hair coloring.

Changes in all areas

“Today, the very concept of male sexuality is changing,” culturologist Olga Weinstein reflects. – Now, in order to look attractive, careful personal care is required, the former “patriarchal” norms are excluded – rough skin, sloppy vegetation, “natural” smell. Previously, a woman could treat such things favorably, regarding them as signs of a “real male”, but now they are more likely to be perceived as shortcomings and cause a feeling of insecurity in the gentleman. A new code of male beauty has appeared, at the same time, self-care has become prestigious, and men no longer hide their interest in this previously “female” sphere. Among the changes of the same order, according to Olga Weinstein, are an expanded range of colors in men’s clothing (now “legalized” such colors that were previously considered “non-male” as yellow or pink), and new men’s fragrances with fruity or floral shades, as well as interest men for home cooking. In addition, “new men” willingly spend time with children.

I’m going to get closer

“These changes are a manifestation of a trend associated with the fact that the traditional boundaries of male and female roles in society are blurring, no longer being as rigid as before,” says sexologist Igor Kon. – A woman becomes more energetic, businesslike, and a man learns something that until recently was not included in the “small gentleman’s set”, for example, taking care of appearance.” Today, families are not uncommon in which the husband, having devoted himself to creative work without a hard schedule, takes on a significant part of the household chores, freeing his wife, who is busy from morning to night at work, from them. Society has recognized the right of men to emotionality, which is no longer opposed to “typically male” behavior. Likewise, attention to one’s appearance, interest in style in clothes, or concern for dry facial skin are not perceived as feminine traits. Men and women become more similar to each other, and a new commonality of interests often contributes to their mutual understanding. “When a wife sees her husband, who, for example, puts cream on his face after an evening shower, he becomes closer and more understandable to her,” emphasizes psychotherapist Olga Dolgopolova. “It reduces the distance between a man and a woman, which inevitably arises in the case of the manifestation of typically masculine traits of behavior, and causes tender feelings.” Rapprochement is helped not only by common interests, but also by common problems: for example, the need to monitor nutrition in order to control weight. If earlier, says Igor Kon, anorexia nervosa occurred almost exclusively in women, but now it is also familiar to men. “Today, in terms of appearance, both sexes have similar concerns, similar problems and similar solutions,” emphasizes the sexologist.

Meanwhile, this new community of interests does not always bring positive results, Olga Dolgopolova believes: “A man with excessive attention to his appearance, with an expensive manicure or in a custom-tailored shirt can cause awkwardness and uncertainty in a woman: in her mind, his male role model, and thus her female role model.

New vulnerability

Does this mean that men now have a better understanding of such typically female concerns as “do I look good”? Gender equality, according to Igor Kon, has led to the fact that a woman has more life choices, and a man, accordingly, has a need to make the right impression with his appearance in order to start a serious relationship. And if earlier it was mainly female appearance that was meticulously evaluated, and men almost never felt that they were being evaluated, now the situation has changed. Therefore, modern men who are losing their former confidence become familiar with the usual female anxieties – shyness, doubts about their attractiveness, concern about their appearance and its compliance with the expectations of others. “Men have received new opportunities to improve their appearance, but with them opened up endless prospects for concern about this. Men are now forced to reckon with critical views from the outside,” notes Olga Weinstein.

However, the requirements for male appearance are made not only by women. “Now a lot is expected of us: both in our relations with others and in our relations with society,” says Olga Dolgopolova. – For the last ten years, I have noticed in men emotional and psychological vulnerability and anxiety caused by the competitive atmosphere in society. But they take care of themselves no longer because they want to be beautiful and like women, but because otherwise they will not be able to win the competition in society: a well-groomed, impeccable-looking man is perceived as more socially successful. In order to succeed, everything is now used – not only education and work experience, but also status appearance.

More individuality

Meanwhile, men today prefer to prove their social success not by bringing their appearance in line with the general norm, but, on the contrary, by finding their own style, expressing their individuality in clothes. Many blogs that post daily photos of stylishly dressed people taken on the streets of different cities around the world show men on an equal footing with women – for example, in The Sartorialist (www.thesartorialist.blogspot.com) or Easy Fashion in Paris (www.easyfashion. blogspot .com). “Modern culture recognizes great multicolor,” notes Igor Kon. – Previously, gay men in the eyes of society looked “somehow wrong”: more body-oriented than heterosexual men, who pay more attention to their style. This made them different. Now, the desire for individuality without regard to standards is characteristic of a person, regardless of his belonging to a particular subculture. It’s already difficult for even salespeople in fashion stores to distinguish “by eye” a buyer with a homosexual orientation.” “The American reality show Queer eye played a significant role in this process, in which gay men taught traditional men how to dress stylishly,” says Olga Vainshtein. According to Olga Dolgopolova, today’s society welcomes individuality, precisely because it is associated with success. “Success is possible where a person corresponds to himself,” she explains. Perhaps this search for individuality will allow the modern man to find not only his style, but also himself, the real one, without fear of accusations of feminine behavior, homosexuality or weakness.

* According to Biotherm – www.biotherm.ru

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