They become presidents of countries and heads of corporations, set sports records and make scientific discoveries, and yet for many, the fate of strong women seems unenviable: “crying at the window.” It is believed that men like exceptionally weak, fragile women, while strong and determined women are more likely to frighten. But is it really so?
When we talk about a strong woman, we most often imagine external attributes. Such a woman has achieved a lot in her career: she holds a high position in a large company or runs her own business. This means that she solves issues with male perseverance, if necessary, she is able to go over the heads, and she has an iron grip. Financially, this girl is independent and can afford a business class car, a good apartment and expensive holidays several times a year.
A toned body, impeccable makeup and styling — such a woman always looks perfect. Stylish office «bows» are replaced by thoughtful and no less stylish casual for informal meetings. She is ready for battle in any situation — a sort of Miranda Priestley from the movie «The Devil Wears Prada».
But if you look not at the cover, but at the content, then a strong woman is, first of all, a psychologically mature person. She knows what she wants and where she is going. Her real strength lies in the ability to make decisions, implement them independently and bear responsibility for the consequences. It is these qualities that give her the opportunity to achieve those most noticeable external attributes to the world.
And a strong man, psychologically mature and accomplished, is not afraid of a strong woman. Moreover: he sees at least five reasons why a relationship with such a woman has excellent potential.
1. A strong woman is able to support a man, be open and give real emotional intimacy. You can be in partnership with her and work together towards common goals. And even if the contribution to achieving this goal is different, the efforts will certainly be mutual.
2. Next to such a woman, a man goes forward and develops, as his woman grows and develops. This is not about the fact that a man needs to be “faster, higher, stronger” in order to conquer his companion and become the “main” in a pair. The point is in the internal resource of a woman, with which she charges a man for action.
3. A man is not afraid for a strong woman: even if something happens to him, she will not disappear. In a relationship, she does not shift responsibility for her life onto him. This gives both partners peace of mind and confidence in the future.
4. Intimacy with such a woman gives real pleasure. A strong woman is capable of deep relationships, her self-confidence excludes manipulating her partner through sex and “working out” her complexes and limiting attitudes in bed.
5. A man chooses a strong woman, because weak ones do not suit him. A strong man cannot afford to be next to an infantile girl, because in this case he himself stagnates.
There is still a stereotype that strong women do not have a personal life. That same Miranda Priestley, by the way, had exactly this: quarrels with her husband, coldness in relationships, parting.
But is it true that, making big deals during the day, at night they cry into the pillow and dream of meeting a man who can be “handed” responsibility for themselves? Hardly. A strong woman does not look for protection in a partner. In a relationship, mutual support and respect are important for her.
Although gender differences are increasingly blurred in the modern world, the attitude “each partner has a role in the relationship” is still valid. Many men really feel uncomfortable next to strong women, and as a result, it is often embarrassing for a woman to become a breadwinner, earn more, and transfer care of the house and children to a man.
You can seem weak so as not to hurt the pride of a psychologically less mature man
Many men subconsciously rely on the familiar model, but where is the guarantee that, having entered into a relationship, a woman will resign as an “iron lady” and go to the kitchen to cut salads? And if he suddenly leaves, a man will have to provide the usual comfort and standard of living. Let’s face it: not everyone is ready for this.
So how to be? There is only one answer: make a choice. He is always there. You can appear weak so as not to hurt the pride of a psychologically less mature man. And you can not change yourself and be strong next to the same strong partner.