It is necessary to be effective, it is harmful to be lazy, it is shameful to do nothing — we hear first in the family, then at school and at work. Psychologist Colin Long is sure of the opposite and encourages all modern people to learn to be lazy.
The Italians call it dolce far niente, which means «the pleasure of doing nothing.» I learned about him from the movie Eat Pray Love. There is a scene in a barbershop in Rome where Giulia and her friend are enjoying dessert while a local man tries to teach them Italian and talks about the peculiarities of the Italian mentality.
Americans work to the bone all week to spend the weekend in their pajamas in front of the TV with a case of beer. And an Italian can work two hours and go home for a little nap. But if on the way he suddenly sees a nice cafe, he will go there to drink a glass of wine. If nothing interesting comes along the way, he will come home. There he will find his wife, who also ran in for a short break from work, and they will make love.
We spin like squirrels in a wheel: we wake up early, make breakfast, get the kids to school, brush our teeth, drive to work, pick up the kids from school, cook dinner, and go to bed to wake up the next morning and start Groundhog Day again. Our life is no longer governed by instincts, it is governed by countless «shoulds» and «shoulds».
Imagine how different the quality of life will be if you follow the principle of dolce far niente. Instead of checking your email every half an hour to see who else needs our professional help, instead of spending your free time shopping and paying bills, you can just do nothing.
From childhood, we were taught that we should work hard, and it’s a shame to do nothing.
Forcing yourself to do nothing is harder than walking up the stairs or going to the gym. Because we were taught from childhood that we should work for wear and tear, and it’s a shame to be lazy. We do not know how to rest, although in fact it is not at all difficult. The ability to relax is inherent in each of us.
All the informational noise from social networks and television, the fuss about the seasonal sale or booking a table in a pretentious restaurant disappears when you master the art of doing nothing. All that matters is the feelings we are experiencing in the present moment, even if it is sadness and despair. When we begin to live with our feelings, we become ourselves, and our selfishness, based on being no worse than everyone else, disappears.
What if instead of chatting in instant messengers, reading a feed on social networks, watching videos and playing video games, stop, turn off all gadgets and just do nothing? Stop waiting for a vacation and start enjoying life every day right now, stop thinking about Friday as manna from heaven, because on the weekend you can get distracted from business and relax?
The art of laziness is a great gift of enjoying life here and now
Take a few minutes to read a good book. Look out the window, have coffee on the balcony. Listen to your favorite music. Learn relaxation techniques such as meditation, whistling, stretching, idle time, and afternoon naps. Think about which of the elements of dolce far niente you can master today or in the coming days.
The art of laziness is the great gift of enjoying life here and now. The ability to enjoy simple things, such as sunny weather, a glass of good wine, delicious food and pleasant conversation, turns life from an obstacle race into a pleasure.