The baby cannot express in words how much he misses you. And older children often choose rather strange ways to communicate that they miss them. You can even mistake them for ridiculous whims.
Open eyes, a happy smile, the baby runs towards him with hugs and kisses. Yes, sure signs that the child was bored. However, there are not so obvious points that are worth paying attention to – the very attention that your baby is missing.
1. Behaves badly only with you
“With dad he is just lovely. And as with me, he begins to whine, to be mischievous, there is no strength whatsoever. Am I a bad mother? He does not love me?” – the mother of the three-year-old son laments.
No, Ksyusha, you’re all right. It’s just that your boyfriend chose this way to show that he is bored. It is those whom they love more that the kids test their strength more, saving for them all their weanings. And all because they are sure that you will love them, no matter what. And dad is strict, he can be on the pope. In general, discipline and discipline again. And love.
2. Hold on to things that mom usually takes with her
Toddlers learn early on to build causal relationships. For example, they throw the pacifier on the floor over and over again – so they understand that the action is followed by the result. In the same way, they notice that when mom leaves home, she takes certain things with her: keys, bag, phone. Therefore, the child is trying to clean up this contraption, which means that the mother will now go into her hands. Attempts to take away a thing usually end in a roar and hysteria. You can cope with this by gradually accustoming the child to parting.
3. Pretending to be sick or upset
This is also from a series of causal relationships. Children learn very well that when they cry or get sick, they get much more attention and love than usual. And so they learn to stage illnesses and take offense when it suits them. There is only one recipe: illness should not be a reason for unnecessary lisping. Attention and affection for a child should always be enough, and not only when he came down with a temperature and scared you half to death.
And sometimes children start crying when you return. This is how they show how much they missed you. If you caress the baby, he will instantly bloom, forgetting about tears.
4. Carry a toy with them all the time
Attachment to a favorite doll, car, even a pillow or blanket is formed in children at the age of about a year. A favorite object symbolizes their mother for them – they seem to transfer their affection for you to him. It can be difficult to wean a child from clinging to a toy all the time. But experts do not recommend pushing: if a child feels calmer and more confident with a doll in his hands, let him. Sooner or later, he will understand that you always come back, and his attachment to the toy will wane.
5. Refuse to eat
Even babies use this method. If the nanny or grandmother bottle feeds the baby while you are away, she may notice that the baby is eating very little. The nanny may decide that the child is simply not hungry, and this will be a mistake: the baby may refuse to eat simply because he does not feel his mother’s presence nearby. After all, he knows how to recognize her by smell.
9. They cling to mom all the time
“Walks with a tail” is about them. The kid clings to the hem, always asks for handles, refuses to get off, you are not able to do anything at all, because the baby hangs on you all the time. And you can’t do anything about it! If you try to ignore the child’s obsessive attempts to get into your arms, tantrums cannot be avoided. Psychologists say that this is how the baby prepares for the phase of natural separation in his development: soon he will learn to understand that he is a separate person from mom and dad, and will stop climbing on your head. In the meantime, it remains only to endure, stroke and kiss.
10. Sleep poorly
Anyone who remains to sit with the baby needs to be prepared for such things: subconsciously, the child remembers even in a dream that his mother is not around, so he sleeps less. Due to internal anxiety, the baby will wake up earlier than usual. And, which is very likely, not in the best mood. After all, having a mother nearby is the main component of his comfort.