“You act like a child”: who are the scammers

Kidults, that is, adults who retain their childhood and youthful hobbies, did not appear yesterday. In psychology, the Latin term puer aeternus, or “eternal boy”, is used to refer to such a personality type. There is another definition – “Peter Pan syndrome” – in honor of the hero, who constantly escaped from reality into the world of illusions.

Today, scammers are talked about more often: it seems that all entertainment industries are working to satisfy the needs of “adult children”. Just look at the film industry, where almost every second blockbuster is based on a comic book. New gadgets, computer and board games, constructors are being developed for scammers. But interest in children’s entertainment is not a reason to consider someone a scammer. What makes it different?

Characteristic features of “adult children”

“In order for a person to be called a scammer, his personality must have a certain set of characteristics. In particular, unwillingness to take responsibility, infantilism and escapism,” explains clinical psychologist Yana Akinkina. Was Hans Christian Anderson a kid who wrote children’s fairy tales? And Tove Jansson, who gave us the Moomins? I think no. They were adults who did not live in a children’s world, but wrote for it. Infantilism as a character trait is inherent in all scammers, but not all people who are called scammers are actually infantile.

According to Yana Akinkina, a sure sign that we have a scammer is not only children’s hobbies and hobbies: it is a child’s worldview. “Difficulty making decisions, unwillingness or fear to care for others. As well as the inability to establish strong and lasting social ties – both work and personal – all these are signs that characterize a scammer better than his hobby, ”says the psychologist.

Originally from childhood

In psychiatry, infantilism is defined as the immaturity inherent in children. The wrong approach to education leads to a delay in socialization and behavior that does not meet age requirements. How does this happen?

“Before, children were allowed to play a lot,” explains Yana Akinkina. – Now we have the opportunity to buy any toys for the child, but often there is no time to play them – either circles, then sections, then gatherings of little geniuses. But the leading activity of preschool children is a game. And if the child did not play enough in childhood, then sooner or later it will manifest itself. Many scammers grew up just from such babies.

Buying gadgets and game consoles of the latest generation, scammers are also trying to make up for lost time in childhood: the lack of a computer like a classmate or “Dandy” like a neighbor.

Male or female?

Despite the fact that a typical scammer is a middle-aged man, there are many women among them. But with their habits, hobbies and hobbies, they do not stand out much against the male “kidalty” background. They tend to emphasize their youthfulness, albeit sometimes in ways that are not quite age-appropriate.

“Buying a purse decorated with unicorns or wearing a headband with cat ears – all this may be strange, but it fits into the socially acceptable behavior for a woman,” explains Yana Akinkina. – In addition, women are more likely to babysit children, and hobbies, for example, dolls or sewing soft toys will not surprise anyone. They will say – “she’s a girl, what to take from her.” Such is the power of stereotypes. But if a man starts playing computer games, building LEGO sets and reading comics, then all this will cause a very definite reaction.”

In fairness, it should be noted that many “children’s” hobbies carry not only entertainment, but also a semantic load. For example, some series of such cartoon hits as “South Park”, “Futurama” or “The Last Airbender” are the quintessence of cynicism, humor (albeit not always refined) and absurdity.

There is a place in them for a deep philosophy of life, and reflections about the future, about one’s place in this world. Therefore, the question of who is more open to the world – a scammer or an “adult” (according to external signs) a person who watches the news on TV every day, seems to remain unresolved.