Contents
This is not education, but the venting of anger.
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Wrong parenting mainly uses the following methods:
- assault (not to be confused with timely light slaps on the pope): cuffs,
- cold severity,
- hysterical swearing
Parents’ Favorite Mistakes
In addition, the following parental reactions cause the child to want to misbehave.
- domestic accusations.
Everyday accusations in communicating with a child are reproaches, reprimands, remarks and other rash criticism. See Household Charges for Raising Children.
- Questions «Why?»
Pointless questions like «Why didn’t you clean your room?» «Why are you teasing your little sister?» And general: «Why do not you listen to me?» See →
- Remarks after praise.
See «Stop on the Good» in How to Praise Your Child
Anxious upbringing
Nothing torments the soul of parents so much as fear for their child. This feeling can manifest itself in different ways. Mom for three years was inseparable from her baby, got used to falling asleep and waking up with him, walking, playing, learned to do household chores and keep the child busy at the same time. And so the decision was made to send the child to kindergarten. Mom consoles herself with hopes that finally, without fuss, she can do something at home, calmly go shopping, take care of herself. But instead of the expected relief, she suddenly notices that she is not able to rest and relax, everything falls out of her hands and thoughts only about the child: “How is he there? Not crying? Have you eaten everything? Did the teachers forget to put on a scarf for a walk? .. ”Anxiety often ruins all mother’s plans, and she runs to the kindergarten to find out if everything is in order, watches from afar how the child walks and, completely exhausted, takes her child home earlier than planned . See →
Egocentric parenting, or everything for a child
Can parental love be too much? Probably not, but its excessive manifestations while ignoring the interests of others is the essence of the egocentric type of education. The child is perceived by parents as a supervalue, the meaning of life, an idol to which the whole way of life of the family is subordinated. See →
The hypersocial type of upbringing in the family does not cause bewilderment among others, on the contrary, it is supported and approved in every possible way; popular rumor will soon give them the honorary title of «decent family.» Neighbors, educators, relatives will admire a well-bred child: he will always say hello and will not forget to say goodbye, give a chair and readily read a poem, he will never bother screaming and running around, and white socks worn in the morning will remain the same until the evening. See →
Education without love
A child who is a source of disappointment and irritation for his parents is even outwardly different from other children. Not finding manifestations of love from loved ones, he will try hard to get them from other adults: an ingratiating look, the desire to please, please, take an adult by the hand, get on his knees. However, it also happens differently. The kid, who has not known affection and tenderness from birth, completely rejects anything like that on the part of adults. His attitude to the world is hostile, he is aggressive, withdrawn, indifferent. But everything described refers to the extreme variants of the manifestation of rejection. It can be observed in socially disadvantaged families by parents who do not read articles like this one and do not think about education at all. See →