Why you need to sit on maternity leave and not rush to go to work

To begin with, I have been on maternity leave for 10 months already. It is really difficult not to go crazy with an endless routine. But it is even more difficult to withstand the pressure of those who constantly ask me when I will finally go to work (including my employer). Young mothers seem to have gone berserk and are competing over who will go to work earlier.

I have a friend, the editor-in-chief of a small provincial magazine. Her baby was not even two months old when she posted on Instagram a post: they say, I can no longer sit on maternity leave, tired of the routine, urgently advise the nanny.

When I went on maternity leave, my employer asked: “Well, you’ll sit at home for a maximum of a month, and then you’ll come back, right?” Now he calls me every month to clarify: well, when already?

It seems that the importance of the mother’s presence in the child’s life is gradually decreasing. (But toys appear that imitate the beating of a mother’s heart!) Mothers themselves do not see happiness in maternity leave: sitting at home is stupefying, interesting and young careerists are already crowding around her husband, and dozens of young and talented people are already applying for your workplace. In general, there is no time, we must run!

Yes, now is the XNUMXst century and there are many opportunities to combine work and motherhood. But let’s be honest. If you like your work and the company of your colleagues so much and you are not ready to give it up at least for a while, then maybe it’s just not the time for a child? To give birth to it because “the clock is ticking,” and not to deal with it means to give the world just one more not very happy person who did not ask for this world.

It is impossible to simultaneously sit with one half of the priests on an office chair, and the other in a home chair with a baby in your arms. It is impossible to be successful in your career and be a first-class parent at the same time. As well as it is a little dishonest to love a child, while spending most of the day in the company of strangers, deliberately depriving the child of happiness and peace of mind when he is with his mother.

I myself did not plan to sit on maternity leave for a long time, I have a CAREER. So somewhere in the third month, I found a nanny, planned complex logistics: how I would take the child to her on the way to work, then pick it up, agreed on a shortened working day with my superiors.

And then one day I looked at my three-month-old baby, who had barely just learned to distinguish my face, focus his gaze and hold his head, and realized how dishonest it would be to throw him, so weak and helpless, at a completely unfamiliar to him. For myself, I decided: the first 9 months, nothing is more important than a mother and her live presence for the child does not exist. Whatever one may say, no matter what arguments you hide behind. So calm down for at least 9 months, Marina, and just be there. More is not required.

While I was on maternity leave, I really constantly worried that life was passing by, my workplace would not wait for me and a new employee was about to be hired for it. I was scared that everything would change at work and it would be difficult to fit into the new conditions. I was afraid that I would completely lose my skill.

But when I returned to the office after 10 months of my absence, I realized that absolutely nothing had changed there. But I have experienced a whole little life! And I will not have any problems with pouring into the operating mode. Even if I spend another six months on maternity leave.

And you know what? Perhaps I will.