Contents
Why fear is not always bad and how it can help you
Psychology
All emotions have a function and when faced with danger we adapt the appropriate strategy to survive
Dale Carnegie said that the fastest and safest way to overcome fear is to continue doing what causes it, and that fear can save our lives in case of threat or real danger but it can also paralyze us and limit our life if it is due to an irrational, unfounded or diffuse cause. In the latter case, according to psychologist Beatriz Gil Bóveda, stop fearing It is equivalent to opening the doors to happiness.
And when we talk about fear, we are not referring only to the first fear we felt in childhood in case the famous bogeyman came to look for us or if someone, under our bed, came out for us, but to all the fears that mentally immobilize us and they do not allow us to advance. In the words of the psychologist Beatriz, fear is the emotion that is experienced in the face of a real, imminent or imaginary danger, which is experienced as overwhelming, and is activated by threats to our physical security, in the first place, although also, by the threat to loved ones or to other people by reason of empathy. And it can be experienced in the face of an imaginary risk or a potential danger product of the imagination, among others.
“The fear of losing one’s life and the fear of the object that may cause it (a person, animal, earthquake, flood or an unknown virus such as the current situation we are experiencing, etc.) are primary sources of fear,” he says.
Although there is a different fear for each person in the world, these are the six universal fears:
— Fear of illness. Illness or loss of health is something that no one wants, which is why it is one of the most common fears, related to the fear of death.
— Fear of death. We fear damaging our body or generating a condition that alters its proper functioning. That is why we stay away from dirty or dangerous places.
— Fear of mutilation. Related to the fear of death, the fear of mutilation is part of the fundamental instinct to preserve our unity and integrity as human beings. For this reason, we are sometimes afraid of certain instruments, such as needles or knives.
— Fear of loss of autonomy. It refers to the fear of losing freedom, the ability to decide our actions or thoughts.
— Fear to loneliness. The fear of loneliness is one of the most frequent fears. There are several situations that put us on alert, such as rejection or contempt. They are a sign that we can lose the bond with the group.
Also, the lack of recognition, respect or appreciation causes a deep emotional wound and increases the fear of loneliness.
Envy and jealousy are closely related to the fear of loneliness. When we feel envy we believe that we will be devalued and / or “eliminated”, depending on the attributes of another. And when we feel jealous, we are afraid of abandonment.
— Fear of feeling humiliated / making a fool of ourselves. The most common way of dealing with fear is to escape or avoid the dangerous situation, whenever possible. If this is not possible, fear motivates you to face danger.
“All emotions have a function and when faced with danger, we adopt the appropriate strategy to survive, which usually is to flee from danger if possible,” he says. He also says that the body reacts quickly to the experience of fear, mobilizing a large amount of energy. They are very violent, very sudden, very intense and fast and they cause a lot of discomfort. When fear is very intense, an anxiety or panic disorder can occur, and among the symptoms could occur:
· Palpitations.
· Feeling of lack of air, of not being able to breathe.
· Feeling of tachycardia, tightness in the chest.
· Sweating
· Nausea.
· Stomachache.
· Feeling dizzy
How to overcome fear
Losing fear is not only synonymous with personal improvement, it also means progress in our life, doors that open and concerns that we leave behind: «Fear keeps us alert, intensifying our senses, and that allows us to better prepare for danger, guiding our fight or flight response. In addition, it helps us feel safe and alive and is responsible (to a large extent) for our own survival. It is necessary to avoid situations of risk and danger ”, says the psychologist.
According to Beatriz Gil Bóveda (@ psique.cambio) there would be four infallible techniques to, if not make it disappear, at least reduce fear:
— Breathing techniques like the deep one, which can help a lot. «Take air through the nose, keep it in the lungs and finally release it gently through the mouth. Each one of the steps should last around four seconds », advises the expert.
— Guided visualization. “It is one of my favorites and consists of a technique to place us in a pleasant mental setting, which manages to calm us down and evade us from anxiety,” he recommends.
— Practice meditation or mindfulness. The psychologist recommends the Calm app where you can start with short guided meditations.
Therefore, facing your fears is a great way to overcome them. It will make you stronger and more resilient, you will learn from mistakes and increase your self-confidence to continue fighting for your dreams and be your best version.