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Good afternoon, dear readers. Have you ever thought about why some people manage to easily endure not very pleasant life situations, while others cannot do without suffering and depression? It’s all about self-irony. Let’s talk about this today.
Self-irony and its components
Self-irony is the ability of a person to evaluate and discuss himself critically and with humor.
There are various examples from history when even individuals who held serious positions had a high rate of self-irony, could laugh at themselves and their shortcomings.
In fact, people who can do this are much happier than those who do not have it. And all because it is almost impossible to offend such a person. This fact is explained simply: without extolling yourself over others, it is impossible to be disappointed in yourself.
So how is self-irony useful for us? Let’s consider its components.
What is an “open personality”?
The ability to laugh at yourself is a sign of an emotionally mature person. With such people it is pleasant to spend time, share thoughts, relax. They tend to listen and hear the interlocutor without introducing any aggravating elements into the conversation.
Key signs of open and emotionally balanced people:
- uniqueness;
- integrity;
- self-expression;
- active life position;
- constant self-development;
- self-regulation.
How to get rid of complexes?
Why do we sometimes take offense at careless statements addressed to us? Because we find some truth in these jokes and begin to complex for one reason or another. Having learned self-irony, a person does not react so sensitively to such things, he keeps in his head the idea that this is the place to be. And if so, then why be offended?
We need to accept ourselves as we are. Nobody’s perfect.
Self-irony involves the complete disposal of any complexes. For this you need:
- find out exactly the cause of their occurrence to the smallest detail;
- objectively assess the current situation, determine the quality of your fear;
- get rid of fear by doing what you are really afraid of;
- truly believe in yourself and your abilities;
- take actions that bring you closer to your goals;
- remind yourself of your talents and virtues;
- love life in general and every single day you live.
The combination of these actions will bring you one step closer to mental stability and emotional maturity.
What kind of person cannot be offended?
If you are characterized by self-irony, it is almost impossible to offend you. After all, each remark or reproach addressed to oneself is perceived without offense, and therefore without anger. Since the level of tragedy is rather low, the situation becomes easier and more distant.
This quality is simply indispensable for public people who often have to speak to large audiences. Naturally, there will be people who agree with certain statements, and those who disagree. And there will also be those who will allow themselves to ask a question with subtext or express their bewilderment in relation to some of your remarks.
A person who is too strict with himself may be offended, and what is worse — go on a cry, defending his point of view. For a public person, such an outcome is unacceptable. Indeed, after such an incident, his reputation may significantly decrease, and those who supported him may change their minds.
Being self-ironic, you will calmly respond to any statement and remark addressed to you and find a suitable answer that will turn everything into a joke without offending either your opponent or yourself. After all, you accept yourself as you are, and you know for sure that you cannot please everyone.
Such an outcome of the situation is the most suitable not only for a public person, but also for someone who does not want to spoil relations with others.
What is optimism?
The ability to look at yourself and the specific situations that take place with a smile and humor is very useful. Not getting upset over trifles is an extremely useful quality, thanks to which we preserve our nervous system and our inherent emotional background.
Advantages of the optimist:
- sees any situation in a broader and longer perspective;
- does not focus on obstacles in the process of achieving goals;
- there is a correlation between a positive attitude towards life and good health;
- relies on himself, his abilities and strengths, does not blame the people around him and circumstances beyond his control;
- has a minimum amount of prejudices and prejudices;
- has an underestimated degree of fear and risk (it is much easier for a fearless person to achieve his goal).
What does it mean to be an optimist? It is to try to see the positive aspects in everything, to accept life as it is, and to try to “squeeze out” only useful emotions from every moment.
What is improvement and development?
The lack of self-irony does not allow us to see any shortcomings in ourselves. In this case, we consider ourselves ideal and mistakenly think that we have nowhere to develop further. But this is far from true. And those who understand this earlier are much more likely to improve in terms of personal growth, strengthen their knowledge and skills in specific areas, ensure continuous personal growth, move up the career ladder, etc.
It is our ability to see and accept our shortcomings that is the key to future development. Knowing that we need to improve something, we will sign up for relevant courses or trainings as soon as possible, read the necessary literature. This will continue until we reach our goals.
And vice versa: a person who considers himself better than the rest does not see his shortcomings. Cultivation in such a situation is out of the question, unless someone influential to him directly tells him about it.
How to develop self-irony?
The feeling of self-irony makes life much easier. After all, if you look at everything with humor, it is much easier to endure moments when reality does not quite or does not at all meet our expectations. In addition, it allows us to develop friendly and warm relations with others, since in their eyes we will not look unapproachable, always dissatisfied and withdrawn personalities.
But what if you do not have such a quality or it is not too developed? How to learn self-irony? It is enough to adhere to the following rules:
- look at all the problems and troubles from the outside;
- do not be offended by jokes addressed to you — answer or laugh together;
- analyze the scale of the consequences of this or that unpleasant incident;
- love yourself the way you are;
- spend as much time as possible with people you like;
- develop self-confidence;
- learn self-irony from the people around you;
- allow yourself to be a unique person, do not imitate anyone.
If you have learned to treat yourself with humor, this does not mean that you have ceased to respect yourself. On the contrary, you have moved to a new, higher level of maturity. Psychology has many cases when a person who has learned self-irony becomes more mature emotionally and achieves more due to the fact that he perceives himself with all the shortcomings, without demanding too much.
Conclusion
Self-irony is needed by a person in order to get rid of complexes, it is easier to endure troubles and careless statements addressed to him, as well as to raise self-esteem. Improve yourself, develop self-irony, become the master of your life!
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The article was prepared by Yulia Gintsevich.