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Shy, sly, predatory, secular, disarming… There are 19 different smiles in total, but we will look at six of them. And which ones do you use? Let us lift the veil that hides the most elusive expression of the human face.
How many times a day do we smile? It all depends on the person and the circumstances. But do we always do it to express pleasure? A smile is complex and can reveal a lot to us. However, unlike laughter, which has occupied scientists for twenty years, a smile – the subtlest manifestation of human feelings – has been little studied.
When do we smile for the first time? Between the 30th and 45th day of life, at the latest at three months. The baby smiles to express joy at the sight of a familiar person, from a melodious sound, or after eating. Then, imitating the facial expression of an adult, he learns to put different emotions into a smile.
American psychologist Paul Ekman identified 19 smiles, including grimaces of fear, contempt or irony. Smiling is primarily a brain process. It all starts with excitation of the anterior hypothalamus, and excitation of the posterior hypothalamus causes a feedback reaction of discontent. From there, the flow of nerve impulses is transmitted to the limbic system, which is responsible for emotions. Muscle tone weakens, a satisfied facial expression appears.
Smiling is another language, a way to express what we don’t say in words.
To laugh, we use 15 muscles; to smile, we need at least XNUMX muscles. However, different smiles use different muscles. For example, a polite smile – a simple stretching of the lips – contracts the zygomaticus major muscle, and a wide and joyful smile involves the circular muscle responsible for the movements of the eyelids. Moreover, the muscles around the eyes can only contract involuntarily when we really experience pleasant feelings. And therefore it is impossible to confuse a forced grimace and a smile of happiness.
Smiling is another language, a way to express what we do not say in words. A smile is not a weak semblance of laughter at all, it opens up different worlds for us: the happy smile of a lover, the embarrassed smile of a timid person, the insinuating smile of a seducer or the detached smile of Buddha … We have chosen six smiles and invite you to get acquainted with them.
Friendly smile: the one that greets us
A smile of greeting, or a smile of politeness that simultaneously brings us closer and keeps distance, can make us suddenly feel at ease, even if there is nothing to connect us with the person who smiles at us.
“I always remember the smile of the woman who worked in our bakery,” says Alexandra, 36. “When I came to her for bread as a little girl, her smile gave me great joy.” Such a smile is not addressed directly to our inner world, it is addressed not entirely to us personally, but to that general and universal, whose image unites us all.
“A sincere smile touches something very important in us – our innate receptivity to kindness,” emphasizes the Dalai Lama in Ethics in the New Millennium (Sofia, 2004).
Embarrassed smile: justifies us
Far from always a smile expresses pleasure, sometimes it can speak of our desire to step back. An embarrassed smile may appear on the lips when we have made some kind of mistake and we are seized with a sense of shame. It is a smile-comment that speaks of our confusion.
“A distressed smile shows that we are trying to cope with emotions rather than just endure them,” explains French psychotherapist Catherine Emele-Perissole. If our smile has power in human relationships, it’s partly because it shows… our fragility.
Courageous smile: gives self-confidence
By forcing ourselves to smile, we thereby remember our successes, not defeats. “Working on my smile and accustoming myself to speak in public, I believed in myself,” admits 48-year-old Lina. Smiling helps you overcome stress and face change more calmly.
“I didn’t know how to ask for an extraordinary vacation,” says 27-year-old Ivan. I decided to approach the boss with a smile. And it worked! The smile brought a smile back.
Protective smile: guarding us
In a situation of uncertainty, a smile is our first weapon, a way to relax, which helps to restrain our own aggressive impulses and neutralize the aggression that another may feel towards us. This sign of stress relief is used in all cultures.
“When I enter a room where I don’t know anyone, I involuntarily start smiling, as if I want to protect myself,” admits 25-year-old Valentina.
Conspiratorial smile: unites us
A conspiratorial smile suggests that people have a common past, that they have experienced something important together. It reveals a deep rapport, an intimacy with a select few people.
“When shooting, I love capturing the conspiratorial smiles and glances of strangers on the street,” says 25-year-old travel photographer Stephen from Norway. The smiles he managed to capture are the best memories of his travels.
Seductive smile: the one that conquers us
The German ethologist Irenaus Eibl-Eibsfeldt proved that smiling is part of the ritual of seduction all over the world. Among Europeans, a smile is what women value most in a man; she is even ahead of the eye. Smiling is reassuring and comforting at the same time.
“Although he didn’t have any qualities that I like, he won me over with his gentle and playful smile,” says 33-year-old photo editor Lisa, who has been living with her friend for a year now. “I felt completely disarmed and completely trusted him.”