Halloween is approaching, a holiday that both children and adults like. Why is this day of fear so attractive and why do we scare ourselves – and not only in October?
Fear is sometimes called primal, and for good reason: it has accompanied us for thousands of years and has played a vital role. Yes, and today he is with us, although we often forget that you can be afraid of something for real. However, once a year, all the worst nightmares come to life – and flood our streets. We asked the expert why we need this Halloween and why we definitely need to be afraid of something. At least sometimes!
Terribly nice!
“Fear is one of the most ancient emotions, and it carries evolutionary meaning. If people were not afraid of anything, they would not have survived to this day. Only due to the fact that a person was able to be anxious and frightened, he could avoid potential dangers, ”explains psychologist and schema therapist Maria Skryabina. How does this mechanism work and what does it contribute to?
There are not so many hormones in our body, and they are all responsible for our behavior, our reactions. Adrenaline is released during anger, during stress, cortisol accompanies guilt. Dopamine is known as the hormone of pleasure, serotonin is responsible for activity and good mood. But they do not “walk” one at a time, but mix into a tricky cocktail, no matter what happens.
When we are afraid, the body releases enough different substances to realize the action potential.
“Completely different emotions are accompanied by the release of the same hormones, and our reaction to what is happening depends on whether our brain recognizes the situation as pleasant or unpleasant,” comments Maria Skryabina. – At the moment of real danger, a powerful process occurs in the body, accompanied by the release of stress hormones – for example, adrenaline. But along with it, serotonin and endorphins are also released.
This mixture of hormones helps us realize the fight-or-flight response. When we are afraid, the body releases enough different substances to realize the action potential – to run away from the tiger or to knock him in the face.
It turns out that fear and the truth can bring … pleasure?! So that’s why the halls are not empty at horror films, and a romantic date, accompanied by watching Saw-3, is doomed to success!
The main thing is safety
Fortunately or unfortunately, today we are not so often frightened. “Of course, we will flinch and sweat if we are cut off by some dashing driver. But the chance to meet a predator, just turning the corner, is small, – Maria Scriabina laughs. “But we have the opportunity to turn on the rescue mechanism, and it remains unrealized.”
Desperate—that is, civilized and safe—times call for desperate measures. And if we are afraid, but we cannot beat the tiger – or the boss – we need to put the accumulated emotions somewhere. For example, “carry” them … to the cinema or to a “scary” party!
In conditions of controlled fear, we can enjoy it. “Here they are on the screen, everything is scary, but I’m safe”
“People like to express their fears, tickle their nerves in a safe environment. Give yourself the opportunity to be properly frightened, knowing that there is no real danger, explains Maria Skryabina. “Because – let’s say it again – when we experience fear, in addition to adrenaline and norepinephrine, the hormones of horror, anger and tension, endorphins and serotonin are also released, which make us feel good.”
In general, in conditions of controlled fear, we can enjoy it. In addition, we remember that “everything is scary on their screen, but I’m safe.” We love this contrast!
Horror Kindergarten
Kids love to tell each other scary stories, and they always have. Remember how in the pioneer camp we scared each other with stories about the Red Hand, the Green Sheet and the Coffin on Wheels? You may be surprised, but your child probably knows very well how to “summon the Queen of Spades.” Why do schoolchildren, even younger ones, like horror films so much (fortunately, if you have a smartphone and access to social networks, anyone can access a wide range of them)?
The fact is that any strong emotions are deposited in our memory. As for the child, his feelings are much stronger than those of an adult. “A chilling thriller that a group of teenagers go to see, or horror stories, or a fairy tale emotionally read by a mother in which a child is kidnapped by an evil witch and everyone saves him – all these are moments of vivid impressions that are deposited in the brain by memories,” explains Maria Skryabina.
It is easier for children to memorize vivid images – that is why, for example, Chukovsky’s works are so popular. “The images created by this writer are grotesque, they cause a slight tickling of the nerves. At the same time, the child understands that he is with his mother, which means that he is safe. After three years, children perfectly begin to realize where is reality and where is a fairy tale, what does not happen in the world, but what does happen, ”recalls the psychotherapist. Well, we won’t write off the “Cockroach” for now!
When children gather around a fire or in a dark room, when they are frightened and tremble together with tension, they empathize with each other.
And as for joint overnight stays with the obligatory summoning of spirits and retelling of urban legends, they also have their own meaning.
“Joint experience of strong emotions unites people,” recalls Maria Skryabina. – No wonder newlyweds are punished to be together in sorrow and in joy. And if the couple has gone through a lot, she feels unity. In the same way, children and adolescents try to unite with each other through different emotions, including fear.
When they gather around a fire or in a dark room, when they are scared and trembling together with tension, when they share secrets and scary stories, they empathize with each other. A connection is established between the participants. And the connection is very pleasant, because the feeling of belonging is accompanied by the release of oxytocin, the hormone of trust and affection.
Note that the same applies to adults. Therefore, if you notice a beautiful stranger in an amusement park, feel free to sit next to her on some of the most risky “roller coasters”. You will leave them on shaky legs, but in these five minutes you will become best friends.
Day X
The day is approaching when young people – and even not only them! – dress up in orange and black, tattered with medical and scary with beautiful at the same time. And if few people remember the religious meaning of the holiday, then psychologists have suggestions on why it appeared at all.
“Halloween is a day when we drive away evil spirits with the help of scary costumes, hooligans and scare each other. In general, it seems to me that this holiday in the West was invented as an outlet for fear. All these costumes, burning pumpkin eyes help to legalize this feeling. Give yourself one day to get scared in a safe environment,” says Maria Skryabina.
Every year, before All Saints’ Day, disputes flare up in the domestic media: to celebrate or not? Should children be allowed to wear a mask? Or is it all not our way, and Halloween should be banned altogether? And yet, in front of the clubs on the last weekend of October, long lines of zombies, skeletons and gothic princesses line up. And children passionately dream of decorating the window, if not with a real Jack pumpkin, then at least with a small orange candle.
The attributes of this day are both terrible and beautiful. But the meaning of it is that we can live our feelings freely and safely.
Why do we – or all these “unreliable citizens” – like the atmosphere of “Day X” so much?
“It seems to me that in Russia this seemingly alien holiday takes root because we also want to give vent to emotions,” suggests Maria Skryabina. “We want to be free to say “I love you” on Valentine’s Day. We want to freely experience fear, the contrast between life and death during Halloween. Perhaps people are simply interested in such a holiday of emotions.
Of course, the fact is that the paraphernalia of this day is both terrible and beautiful. But the meaning of it is that we can live our feelings freely and safely – and unite with others in this endeavor.
Indeed, fear unites!
About expert
Maria Scriabin – psychologist, circuit therapist.