Why do we celebrate New Year’s?

We are reborn. “The seasons can be likened to both the time of day and the periods of our life,” says Vladimir Baskakov. Everything in nature is cyclical. And if spring is morning and childhood, then it turns out that winter is night and death. The New Year differs from all other holidays of the year in the first place in that it is not a “day” at all – we begin to celebrate in the late evening of December 31, and the New Year comes at midnight. And although formally the New Year ends only the first winter month, for many it marks the middle of the cold season. And in the very center of this darkness, cold and peace, a bright point of heat, activity, life appears – a holiday, fun. We are a northern country, it’s cold on New Year’s Eve, and from a thanatotherapeutic point of view, this is very successful, because this ensures maximum contrast, and the brighter we experience our vitality and ability to regenerate.”

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We are participating in a ritual. A Christmas tree, garlands, Olivier salad, the film “The Irony of Fate”, the President’s speech, the chiming clock, champagne, gifts … The procedure for New Year’s Eve is predictable. In this sense, it can be considered a ritual. “The Latin word ritualis means “a known sequence of known actions that is guaranteed to lead to a known result,” reminds Vladimir Baskakov. The need to care about the result thus disappears, and we can fully surrender to the experience of each coming moment. The ritual has a unifying function – we all together, both familiar and unfamiliar, perform the same actions, and this unites the group, whether it be a family, a circle of friends or society as a whole. And, since success is “guaranteed” for us (after all, the New Year will definitely come), this symbolically strengthens our confidence that our other actions will also lead to the desired results.

By the way, the increase in anxiety that some of us feel on the eve of the New Year holidays may be associated with the instability of the ritual, with a lack of understanding of one’s place in it. Then maybe you should think it over in advance, write a plan? “It’s not worth it,” Vladimir Baskakov disagrees. “We think about our actions all the time and set conscious goals for ourselves … During the holiday, we do not need to fear failure: no matter how “wrong” we act, January 31 will come for December 1. So we have the opportunity to safely try a different way of acting and perceiving: open up to what is happening and listen to our intuition, let it tell you what to do.”

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We part with the past. “You can’t pour more champagne into a glass filled to the brim,” notes Vladimir Baskakov, “so if we want to get something new, this means that we must make room for it, parting with something.” But separation is not easy for everyone. This situation itself can cause anxiety and even fear – and regardless of whether we part with good or bad. “I sometimes offer an exercise with which you can understand how we are going through a breakup,” says Vladimir Baskakov. Two people stand facing each other at a distance of about ten paces. Then one of them turns a little sideways to the other, as if about to leave. He has not left yet, he has only indicated the direction, and for the “remaining” this causes a strong reaction, he experiences sadness. Then I ask: “Do you want him to leave?” And often the answer is “no”. Then I propose to ask the “leaving” if he wants to leave. Maybe he wants to stay? After the question, he stops. At this point, a choice arises when we can influence what is happening, we can interact – in the example given with another person, but also with circumstances – enter into a dialogue, express our wishes. In the New Year, we remember past events, re-evaluate them, decide what we want to take with us into the future and what we want to leave in the past.

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But what if we still lose something that was dear to us? “Perhaps in this case we will be sad. And our sadness will be evidence of the value of what we had.” The psychotherapist recalls the story of Francis of Assisi, who grieved over his dead friend and said: “I am immensely unhappy because I lost him, but I am immensely happy that I had such a friend.” Life consists of dualities: inhale-exhale, day-night, joy-sadness. This is life. “Accepting our sadness, we open ourselves the opportunity to experience joy,” emphasizes Vladimir Baskakov.

We are returning to childhood. Not literally, of course, but symbolically. “We always buy a live Christmas tree,” admits Vladimir Baskakov. – Even if you have to look for it, as this time, we bought it in the Moscow region, it is fluffy and smells of real resin. The world of childhood is a world of smells. In childhood, everything smells, plasticine, pencils. Smell is a time machine, it instantly takes us back to the environment where we first met it.” And if someone in childhood had an artificial Christmas tree? Then, perhaps, some other impressions will come to the fore. The important thing is that we revive our childhood memories and the freshness of the worldview of that time. We can even play a little carefree and fun, create a “holiday theater”, where everyone has their own role. “We just put up a Christmas tree,” continues Vladimir Baskakov, “and our adult daughter comes to decorate it. She specifically travels for this from the other side of the city. It’s a tradition and a reason to get together.” By fulfilling customs and maintaining family habits that are passed down from generation to generation, we give events repetition and life stability, and become participants in an eternal cycle of renewal.