Contents
Most of us have made up our minds about our feelings about non-traditional male sexual orientation. But if many women treat gays with curiosity or sympathy, then men often speak aggressively about them. What makes some heterosexual men treat homosexuals this way? Word to our experts.
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“Unconscious fear of one’s own homosexuality”
Vitaly Zimin, psychoanalyst
“One of the reasons for such hostility is associated with an unconscious fear of one’s own homosexuality. Each of us in early childhood goes through a period when we feel love not only for a person of the opposite, but also for our own sex. A boy (in this case we are talking about men) needs a male figure next to him, a father or an older brother whom he could love, respect and who would love him.
If a boy in childhood experienced mutual, safe love for a person of the same sex, he “uses” this experience in adulthood, for example, maintains deep friendships with men, and is tolerant of gays. If there was no such figure nearby or she was too frightening, having matured, he will begin to experience a strong unconscious fear of warm feelings towards other men. This fear can also be projected onto gays. On the other hand, hostility towards gays may also be a defensive reaction to their seductive behavior.”
“Deep insecurity in your masculinity”
“There is nothing surprising in the hostile attitude of men towards gays, because in general it is human nature to reject that which does not correspond to nature and the social order. There are men who, when talking about gays, demonstrate exaggerated emotions – rejection, anger, disgust. Most often, this speaks of a deep fear – the fear of losing manhood. As a rule, people who are not confident enough in their masculinity react so sharply and categorically. Really strong men treat gays much more condescendingly. But in any case, the rejection of people of non-traditional orientation is a sign of low tolerance and weakness of society.”
“Agressiveness is instilled in men by society from childhood”
Evgeniy Kashchenko, Doctor of Sociology, Deputy editor-in-chief of the journal “Sexology and sexopathology”
“Men have different attitudes towards “passive” and “active” homosexuals: their contempt, ridicule, aggression are more often directed at those who play the “female role” in a gay couple, who allow themselves to be mastered. An “active” gay acts as a leader, his manifestation of power often causes men to simply indulge. At the same time, the vast majority of men in Russia believe that the manifestation of homosexual inclinations in a man will lead to his downfall in the eyes of his comrades. And aggressiveness in expressing one’s feelings is largely the result of the influence of society, because boys have been told since childhood: you must be strong and active. And as a result, aggressiveness is often perceived by us as a synonym for masculinity.