Do I love you, do you love me? Don’t know. But when we enter the lobby of the Palace Hotel, I’m glad to have you on my arm.
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“If only you knew from what rubbish love grows, knowing no shame” — probably, Anna Akhmatova would start writing about it like that.
Why is born — or not born — love? Where does she come from and why does she leave?
For love to be born, some prerequisites are needed: they can be sexual attraction or social stereotypes that say that it is necessary and time to fall in love. Once upon a time, craving for another person arises from a general life longing, from a desire to occupy oneself with at least something, to entertain oneself with something↑, or to give oneself at least an illusion of the meaning of life, or to distract oneself from mental pain. For many, the game of love is a status game. There are also much more beautiful options when a person carries in advance in his soul the image of the Beloved or Beloved as the one he (she) prepares himself to meet in order to make that person truly happy.
One way or another, for the birth of love, even a small, but pre-love is needed.
There are always some conditions around us that help us — or hinder us. No matter how common stories are about how girls fall in love with star actors, we more often really fall in love with those who live next to us, with whom we intersect in life. A schoolgirl is more likely to fall in love with a guy from her school, a student is more likely to be carried away by a girl from her class, people are often brought together by common hobbies or joint work, leaders are often interested in girls who become their secretaries … Friendship often contributes to future love, and it is good friendship that turns out to be a reliable foundation for future happy love↑.
When there are prerequisites for love in the soul of a person, love can be born. But will it arise and what does it depend on? Sometimes love is born suddenly when natural anchoring (imprinting, imprinting) occurs, in some cases a person simply finds a suitable option for himself and makes an internal choice: “This suits me.” In the first case, love is born, in the second — just a relationship.
What is better, what is worse? One thing can definitely be said here: one thing cannot be praised here. And relationships, sometimes, become the beginning of true love, and love, as you know, sometimes goes out, not growing to love.
They say that sometimes love is born as a result of a love spell, but more often it is more practical to use the male and female military arsenal …
What awaits love after it was born? There are many options here, a lot determines what happens in one way or another, sometimes conscious, sometimes not — a calculation that usually has in mind worldly benefits and conveniences. If the relationship developed successfully and became established, gratitude arises between people, in any case, over time, attachment occurs between people — both worldly and spiritual. Love that has grown only out of flashed feelings naturally goes out by itself, but if people want to maintain relationships that are dear to them and maintain the fire of love, this is quite real↑. And quite over time, love in many ways turns into a habit and lives as a habit, sometimes growing into a way of life …
How do you like this perspective: love as a way of life?
What love grows from what
What kind of love — it largely depends on what underlies it: physiology or social stereotypes, feelings or mind, a healthy and rich soul — or lonely and sick … Choice-based love is usually correct and often healthy, although with a crooked head it is possible and martyr options. Love-I want usually grows out of sexual attraction. Sick love almost always grows out of neurotic attachment, love is suffering, sometimes covered with a romantic touch.
The love of each of us is a reflection of our personality, and our common to people and life, the development of our positions of perception largely determines the type and nature of our love. See →