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This question torments many parents. On the one hand, now children who have literally grown up in social networks are striving to become independent earlier. On the other hand, often their readiness for this turns out to be only an illusion. So how to understand that a child can already be allowed to go out alone without fear? And how not to go crazy with anxiety?
In Russia, there is no law regulating the age at which a child can go outside without adult accompaniment. But at the same time, according to the Family Code of the Russian Federation, until the age of majority, it is the parents who are responsible for his safety, mental and physical well-being.
So, it is up to them to decide when it is time to give the child the opportunity to walk independently. And, of course, the decision depends on many individual factors.
Nevertheless, psychologists recommend letting children go out alone no earlier than ten years. The fact is that it is at this age that the child develops the ability to objectively assess the situation, and not perceive it as a game. By the end of elementary school, the child begins to be well aware of the danger, and usually already knows how to predict events.
And now the child turns ten … He shows that he is quite capable of spending time on his own, but then parental anxiety turns on: “What if something happens?”, “And if he fails?”
To calm fears, first you need to understand: what is the use of such independent walks?
- First, they form the independence and responsibility of the child.
- Secondly, thanks to them, the child receives more information and experience than under the strict supervision of parents.
- Thirdly, trust is formed between the child and parents.
“When a mother turns into a personal bodyguard, she not only limits her personal space, but also interferes with the proper development and formation of the child’s personality. This is bad for both parties: the mother is completely immersed in the educational process and plays only this social role, and the child receives hyper-custody, which in the future may affect his worldview, ”explains psychologist Yulia Mitrokhina.
What else will help you feel calmer?
1. Don’t allow everything at once
The transition to independence should be gradual. For example, at first you can move away for a while while the child is walking on the playground, then give him the opportunity to walk alone to a friend or relative who lives in the next entrance, and then an independent exit to the store is already possible.
At the same time, in the latter case, for the first time, an adult should follow – in this way it will be possible to check whether the child remembers the way, and help him out if necessary.
2. Get a smart watch
When parents let their children go out alone, they must know where they are. And children should always have mom and dad’s phone numbers at hand, as well as a written down home address. All this can be easily solved by buying children’s smart watches. .
Thanks to GPS and other built-in navigation systems (GLONASS, GPS, Beidou, etc.), parents will be able to track their child’s location. In addition, with the proprietary FamCare application in the smart watch settings in HUAWEI WATCH KIDS 4 Pro, you can set a safe area and receive notifications when the child leaves it. At the same time, the gadget has a built-in SOS alert system, as well as a call function (as in a regular smartphone), which helps to keep in touch with the child.
An additional safety element is the LED lights on the sides of the screen. When walking at night, they flash, making the child visible to drivers of passing cars.
If you are worried that the child will not want to wear a watch, then do not. Indeed, in addition to the safety can entertain a child, almost like a full-fledged smartphone: they have a 5 MP camera with a set of funny stickers, a SIM card slot, a 4G modem, Wi-Fi and Bluetooth modules, 1 GB of RAM and 8 GB of internal memory.
The gadget will also inspire your son or daughter to have a good time. The watch supports different training modes: it has a swimming function (which can detect breaststroke, freestyle, butterfly and backstroke), a jump rope and squat counting mode, and step tracking.
3. Explain not to interact with strangers
The golden rule – never talk to strangers – should be learned by every child. It is especially important to explain to the child that it is impossible to enter the entrance or the elevator with strangers.
You can teach him to say to strangers holding the door: “I’m waiting for dad.” And in case of danger, do not be shy, loudly call for help and turn on the SOS mode on .
4. Teach basic traffic rules
Explain to the children that it is important to stay away from cars with running engines and headlights on.
The fact that you need to cross the road only at the green light, children need to learn from early childhood. Now it would be good to emphasize that it is better to stand at the crossing for an extra couple of seconds, because some drivers skip right after switching the traffic light.
In turn, unregulated transitions at first should be avoided by children.
5. Remember yourself as a child
Remember how you longed for freedom, how you dreamed that your parents would accept your choice. “Think about how important it was to you that your parents trusted you. When you refresh this memory, you will come to the realization that our needs are actually the same and your child is exactly the same as you: he also wants to live, he wants to see this world and be a significant part of it, ”sums up the psychologist Julia Mitrokhina.