what to give a child: a list

For a month now, I have been looking with sadness at the package of toys that Marusa gave for her second birthday. Weighty package, inside – several kilos of potential lots on the sites of free classifieds and groups “Give it for free”. It’s just that until the hand rises, put it all up for sale-return. Somewhere inside there is a glimmer of hope that Marusya will still appreciate at least some of the gifts. In order not to suffer from unnecessary things from year to year, I decided to make a list of gifts non grata.

Apparel

No! Not clothes. Please! This is especially true for grandmothers and other close relatives. No blouses, pants, hats, jackets or shoes. Firstly, everyone has a different taste: someone prefers minimalism and faints from ruffles and rhinestones, someone reduces their cheekbones from simple melange overalls with a tiny bow on the side. 

Secondly, even mothers can sometimes make a mistake with the size. I have wonderful trousers that I just could not leave in the store, they were so good. She believed that they would suit Marusa. The result is sad: the child never put them on. Chubby legs just didn’t fit into super skinny. 

Thirdly, many parents have accumulated wardrobes and boxes of this very clothes, another T-shirt with a funny print will be not just superfluous, but catastrophically superfluous. 

Outfits can be gifted only in one case: if you were asked about it, they sent a link to the site with the size and specific color.

Dolls

My friends, if you think that my mother, that is, I, does not buy dolls for her daughter, you are very much mistaken. And if, when you come to visit me, you do not see a dozen “lal” sitting on the beds, sofas and dressers, this is not a reason to think that they are not there. Our dolls rest in three huge diaper boxes. Because now they are not interested in Marusa. And when they will, it is not known. If at all they will. In a basket with toys, there is an expensive naked baby with the smell of vanilla and a doll Masha, who tells fairy tales and sings songs. Marusya’s interest in them lasted for five days. All the others weren’t attracted at all.

Believe me, only the mother knows exactly what her child is playing. When I was going to give the doll to my niece, I asked my husband’s sister what exactly Ksyusha loved. Got a specific description and went to the toy store. The sales assistant tried to convince me to buy the doll I did not need (not cheap, but ugly), but offered all kinds of “vanilla” dolls. I had to literally lie down with my bones to defend the ugly one. 

Constructors

I believe there are crazy fans of famous designers. Probably, there are a lot of them, judging by the number of orders and crazy price tags. But who even said that everyone loves designers? I admit that one out of a hundred children will be sincere and interested in assembling a boat or a train. For everyone else, this is a one-time toy: assemble, disassemble and scatter parts throughout the apartment. And then mothers, swearing, will put it all in boxes, sort by models, find sharp cubes in bed, step on them at night on the way to the toilet. 

In addition, just one lost part turns the constructor into a set of plastic trash, since the ship will simply not be assembled without some central ball. 

It seems to me that a well-known free classifieds site can act as a measure of the uselessness of a particular toy: the more goods there are in excellent and perfect condition, the more useless it is. Spoiler alert: constructors are in the top.

Books

I confess that I consider a book to be the best gift for myself. Good, high quality, interesting. True, while there is a problem with time: in order to read, Marusya needs to walk up, make him laugh, play, put him to bed, and if there are no urgent household chores, I will have several hours to write a book. But this is for me, but not for the child. We already have five (!) Copies of “Turnip”, two of which are absolutely identical. For some reason, the majority of donors follow the principle: “It is impossible to be mistaken with little classics.” The classics are “Ryaba Chicken”, “Turnip”, “Cinderella”, as well as Chukovsky, Marshak and a little Mikhalkov. We have several copies of them. 

The second problem with books is their quality. Often, printing houses sin with the work of “brush it off”. I’m not a Grammar Nazi, but as a journalist and editor, my eyes itch from spelling and punctuation errors. Chukovsky would beat modern literary editors and proofreaders with handwritten manuscripts for literacy. Do not give my child illiterate books, please.

Toys with sound

For those who donate them, there is a separate special cauldron in hell. Which not only boils oil, in which sinners are boiled, but also plays music. The same melody, hellishly loud, in a circle without end. I have a whole list of applicants for this boiler. Children’s synthesizer, screaming machine, singing Masha, other miracles – after half an hour of playing with them, my head swells so much that it does not fit into the door. I have to quietly pull out the batteries from everywhere, and then make a face “I don’t understand why I don’t play, I’m tired, probably”. 

Towels, magnets and other “souvenir” 

Luxurious gift box tied with a bow. It seemed to me and Marusa that some miracle was hiding there. In anticipation, they tore apart the packaging and … found a bear rolled from towels. As a lover of bears, Maroussia even tormented the towel beast for half an hour until his ears and paws unrolled. And then she threw a piece of terry cloth with sticky eyes somewhere in the corner. The quality is lame, you can’t even wipe your hands like that. Of course, everything can be used, but it would be better with money or flowers.

This section includes various singing and dancing animals, magnets, puzzles with resort cities – everything that is so rich in shops in Turkey, Egypt, Spain and other “beach” countries.

Stuffed Toys

If a smiling man with a huge teddy bear in his hands appears in my apartment again, I will take a picture of him and upload the frame to a separate folder. What for? To bring him this bear to wash and dry in a month. Well, or at his expense, once a quarter, dry-clean the hairy dusty giant. 

In general, all plush men are permanent residents of the sites “I Will Give For Free”. Think why? Do you want to spoil the life of parents and children? Never wear soft toys as gifts. Well, only if asked very much.

Clippers

Radio-controlled and huge dump trucks. Models of sports cars and puppy patrol vehicles. Let’s blacklist all of this as a gift. Why? Because the parents definitely bought the right typewriter for their child. And yours will be either one more, or superfluous, or unnecessary. 

The only exception is that you were asked in advance about the typewriter, and this particular one. 

The right gifts

She criticized everything, but she did not say what to give. It’s simple.

Give balloons – they can be deflated, inflated, deflated again, stored compactly, and they will always delight children.

Give certificates to shops, parents will decide for themselves what to spend. Just choose places with a large assortment, where there are clothes, food, toys, care products, strollers and sledges.

Give trivial money, you can always buy what the child really needs with it. Or just flowers for mom. It’s always nice.