PSYchology
The film «In front of the class»

As for the school, the attitude towards the child by peers is set primarily by the attitude of the teacher towards him.

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Has your child been bullied by peers? The situation can be corrected, because you are next to him! The child often comes home from school or kindergarten in a depressed mood, tears and even abrasions: his peers have chosen him as a target for witticisms and cruel jokes. Your first impulse is to breastfeed to protect your baby. But won’t you make it worse for him?

Why is he humiliated?

​​​​​​​Of course, no child deserves to be neglected — every child is unique and has its own merits. But it is far from always easy for a little man to show his strengths in a team, because his peers are much more willing to discover his weaknesses.

Which? It can be poor physical fitness, untidy or not fashionable appearance, poor academic performance, excessive fullness, and so on.

Perhaps the child is often sick, skipping school or kindergarten, so he will not become his own in a class or group. Some children have a complex character: they are too passive, insecure or sensitive and vulnerable. One way or another, little “outcasts” accumulate resentment towards their peers, a feeling of loneliness, envy of other children. The unfortunate child withdraws into himself, begins to deceive, brag, slander, or secretly take revenge on the offenders.

Need your support

Sometimes it is better not to interfere in the relationship of children, but this is not the case. First, understand the reasons for the unpopularity of the child and try to eliminate them. Maybe it doesn’t look very modern? Take care of his wardrobe and appearance. Too weak physically? Get him interested in some sport. Does he study badly? Be a tutor yourself or hire a specialist. Does he underestimate himself? Help me gain confidence in my strengths and abilities. Emphasize his dignity at every opportunity. Do not skimp on praise, admire your child and do not forget that the child looks at himself with your own eyes.

ABC of communication

The next stage is teaching the baby useful skills in relationships with other people: more activity, friendliness, the ability to stand up for oneself, and when necessary, restrain and give in. And remember: the more confident the child feels, the easier these skills are given to him. It would be useful to ask the class teacher or teacher to support his son or daughter, perhaps to involve him in some important business, which will increase his prestige in the eyes of others. But it cannot be ruled out that the situation in the children’s team is actually too unhealthy, and then it would be better to transfer the child to another school or kindergarten.

You are the «producer» of his talents

All children dream of being the best — but how to demonstrate their own virtues to others? For fear of being rejected, not every child is able to openly claim a better role in a game or other collective activity. Give your son or daughter this opportunity! Organize some common event for him and his friends: a children’s party, a country outing. «His» territory, «their» adult, the opportunity to get a profitable role and cope with it — that’s what a child needs to feel safe and reveal his talents.

How to teach a child to stand up for himself

This is one of the most burning questions. He worries both moms and dads, but dads, probably, still more.

“Life is cruel,” the men say. — It is necessary to break through with a fight, and we have a slobber growing.

Moreover, as a rule, those fathers who themselves did not know how to stand up for themselves in childhood, and in adulthood do not painfully resemble Rimbaud or James Bond, are indignant about filial slobbering. However, it is understandable. We all want our children not to repeat our mistakes and to be happier than us. See →

If a child is teased at school

The child is teased at school. It does not matter what exactly was the reason for this for classmates — tall or, on the contrary, short stature, some other lack of appearance, a character trait, and so on. «Teasers», offensive nicknames, constant ridicule hurt the child, especially if he is naturally vulnerable and shy. There are times when this situation gets out of control and becomes irreversible. The child perceives school only as a place where he is subjected to bullying. This can affect his self-esteem, academic performance and, ultimately, his state of mind.

What should parents do in this case? What to do if your child is teased by classmates, if because of ridicule he does not want to go to school? See →

Outcast children: psychological work with the problem

In every children’s team there are popular children and not very popular ones. There are active, sociable children, and there are quiet, loners. Some are satisfied with a secondary role in the class, others suffer from such a situation, but do not know and do not know how to change it. Some children are so eager to be in the center of attention of classmates, to take a leadership position, while not being able to behave in accordance with their claims, choosing inadequate ways of behavior, that they seek attention “with a minus sign” — they become the object of ridicule and contempt. And these guys, actively rejected by their peers, are, unfortunately, a frequent and difficult-to-correct phenomenon. See →

How can you help your child build relationships with classmates?

It is the family that provides the child with a certain level of intellectual development and instills communication skills. Of course, parents cannot directly influence the situation that has developed in the team. But often they notice before teachers that their child is uncomfortable in the classroom, that he has a bad relationship with classmates. In this case, it is necessary to take immediate action — it is better to go and talk about the disturbing symptoms with the class teacher in order to dispel doubts than to allow the situation to get out of control. In such a situation, parents turn to the school psychologist for help. See →

Outcast Child in the Classroom (Tips for Teachers and Parents)

The most important thing to remember is: the position of the child in the classroom up to adolescence is 90% dependent on how the teacher treats him. And for first-graders — for all 100. Therefore, if the child does not develop relationships with classmates, the teacher can solve the problem by giving the children a sign that she likes the child, that he has something (it doesn’t matter what, at least wipe off the board) is the best, that he is important and needed in class. See →

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