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Have you ever had the feeling that you are not in your place, and there is nowhere to move – after all, you don’t know how to do anything else? Often in such cases, dissatisfaction with oneself leads to conflicts with others and personal crises. Why is this happening and how can you help yourself?
Often we do not understand what our real abilities are, what unique opportunities we have. At the same time, we can have a real “treasure”, but not attach importance to it. And this is how it can manifest itself in everyday life.
One person placed an order in an online store, and in the form of “special delivery conditions”, for the sake of laughter, he indicated: “I want a manatee in a top hat to be drawn on the package.” When the order was delivered to him, it was in an ordinary box, on which, indeed, there was a real manatee – in a top hat, as the author of the comment asked. The drawing was a drawing of such high quality that it could have easily embellished a children’s book.
Who do you think drew it? Warehouse worker who sorts, sorts and packs orders. This picture went around the Internet for a year – that’s how it delighted people. And its author simply shifts the boxes, although he could live a completely different life …
Often we do not know where the limits of our capabilities lie – in childhood we did not have comfortable conditions that would allow us to try ourselves in different areas. Not all parents could offer an interesting pastime, not everyone was allowed to choose what they wanted. Some did not have the financial means or time, while others simply did not consider it necessary to invest in the development of children.
In adulthood, we have the opportunity to organize our own lives. But often even at this time there are no conditions that would allow you to hear the call of your heart and do at least at the level of a hobby what you really like.
As a result, a certain habitual course of life develops, in which there is no place for one’s own interests.
At the same time, the realization of one’s abilities is not just a need, but a great pleasure and, moreover, a powerful source of energy. When we are truly busy with our work, we, of course, get tired, but, enjoying the process and getting the result, we do not feel spiritual devastation, but inner uplift, self-confidence and in the future. Our self-esteem increases.
How to understand that a person does not fully realize his potential? A sure sign is that daily work does not bring joy. If work is perceived as an incredible burden, life is accompanied by a feeling that we are in slavery – this is a stop signal. However, everything can be changed, because we ourselves drive ourselves into this state because of fictional fears and disbelief in ourselves. And that means we can change the present.
Fear 1. I have no ability
In fact, every person has some kind of superpower. We are all superheroes! You definitely need to understand what makes you unique. Awareness and realization of our strengths make our life more interesting and eventful.
Fear 2. I’m afraid of change
New things are always stressful. This is fine. Getting out of your comfort zone is always difficult. Even if we change jobs or housing for better options, the first time is still difficult for us, because we need to adapt. Even if a million euros falls on us, we need to learn how to take care of this million and store it properly. Even the most positive and desirable changes in life are a way out of the comfort zone, where everything has long been studied. And a person can be scared. This is fine.
Fear 3. What if I become known as an upstart?
We are afraid of being judged. Changing jobs, we do not want to be in the position of beginners and at the age of 40 work on an equal footing with yesterday’s students. Thoughts appear: “After all, I have more requests and responsibilities than these“ chicks ”, I have a family, children need to be raised …” This stops us, and we remain at the same point where we were.
Fear 4. I may lose money
The fear of being left without a livelihood is extremely strong in our minds. It is associated with deep, reptilian fears of death and rejection, and prevents one from realizing in a new sphere.
This fear makes you hide deeper into your hole and repeat: “Actually, I have no talent, but for some reason I decided to become a photographer, although I was a normal accountant. Chased the unattainable and ruined his well-established life. It’s easier and more habitual to be content with what you have.
Fear 5. I will not be in demand
We compare ourselves with competitors who are more experienced and successful, those who have been engaged in our desired activity for many years and have achieved everything. Therefore, tremors often arise: “Well, where do I go, they will probably choose him, and not me.” Which is also a huge mistake.
After all, if you follow this logic, after the great novel “War and Peace” there is no point in writing books. And why invent the iPhone when there is already Nokia? Can you imagine where humanity would be if no one tried to do something new, honoring what has already been created?
When all four previous fears pile on, it’s much easier to accept the fact that nothing will work out than to move forward.
Initially, fear is a useful emotion, it sharpens attention and activates internal resources for making decisions in a potentially dangerous situation. If you learn to be in contact with him, he can be a powerful resource for a breakthrough, because thanks to him you will be better prepared and take into account even the smallest nuances.
If fear blocks your movement to a better life, this is not a sentence. Special techniques allow you to defeat monsters that actually live only in our heads.
About the Developer
Olga Dmitrieva – transformational coach Her .