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Hello dear readers! “You just got lucky”, “You are not good enough for this”, “Soon everyone will understand the real level of your abilities” — have you heard such a voice in your head? It’s the impostor syndrome. And there are a lot of people who suffer from it. Let’s try to figure out what it is, how it affects a person’s life and how to get rid of it.
Causes of
The impostor syndrome is a psychological phenomenon in which a person does not accept his own achievements. Despite success, praise from outside, and real evidence of competence in some area, such people continue to think that they are deceivers and do not deserve the success they have achieved. In most cases, they tend to think that everything happened by accident or because of the introduction of others into deception.
Scientists have identified the following causes of impostor syndrome in humans:
- Inflated demands in childhood and rivalry. As a rule, parents play a key role here. Very often we can observe how mom and / or dad demand high scores from their child, ideal behavior, give it to all kinds of circles and sections with the hope of raising a star. But they do not think about what the child will feel when he does not succeed in everything, when he learns about his mediocrity.
- Perfectionism in everything. It is very difficult to grow up in a family where you are required to be perfect in all areas. If parents were forced to bring everything to the ideal in childhood, they will raise their children in the same way. Kids, in turn, will scold themselves for the lack of impeccability in the tasks they perform. And these are direct prerequisites for the development of the impostor syndrome. It’s easy to imagine a person who devalues their accomplishments by constantly mistaking that they could have done an even better job. To prevent this, admire your children, praise them as often as possible.
- Mistakes in parenting. It is possible to face a situation when parents tell an adult that he does not know enough to make a decision or that he still does not know how to manage money. Naturally, such groundless attitudes from loved ones are very traumatic, disrupt the emotional state, develop self-doubt and self-doubt.
Risk factors and pathogenesis
To date, in psychology, risk factors for the development of impostor syndrome have been clearly defined. They are closely connected with the period of personality formation — childhood, the behavior of the family in which it took place, with the environment.
As a result of many sociological studies, it was found that children who grew up in dysfunctional and low-income families suffer from this disorder. From childhood, they were instilled with the stereotype of working at a low-paid job, not striving for the best. Naturally, an individual who has grown up in such conditions, having received a good job, first of all begins to think that he is not worthy of it. He feels emotional discomfort because he feels that he does not belong here.
The following factors become determining in the development of this syndrome:
- hereditary tendency to mental disorders;
- physical and psychological conditions caused by events that caused trauma to the psyche;
- unfavorable family and social living conditions;
- congenital personality traits;
- neurodynamic deviations.
There are also cases where cognitive helplessness accompanies impostor syndrome. This is when a person, having the necessary knowledge and skills due to cognitive characteristics, cannot cope with the task assigned to him. In this case, he is not able to adequately assess his own strengths and skill level. Negative situations in the past, as well as mistakes made, become the reasons that the individual subconsciously underestimates his abilities.
Symptoms
To diagnose the impostor syndrome, it is enough to observe yourself and your thoughts for a relatively short period of time, and then analyze them.
People with this syndrome are characterized by the following behavioral features:
- They feel like hypocrites and pretenders. They constantly think that their professional success is a coincidence, and everything that happens to them, they do not deserve. They find many factors that play into the success of their affairs — nice appearance, friendship with someone from the leadership, unpredictable success, etc.
- Devaluation of success. They believe that the results of their work deserve neither praise nor attention.
- Evasion of recognition and career advancement. Such people quite often work in one position throughout the entire time. This happens because they mistakenly think that they will not cope with the new tasks.
It is worth noting that such people rarely listen to the opinions of others, because. have full confidence in the models laid down in them at an early age.
Stages of development
Imposter syndrome develops in several stages:
- Initial. A person quits what he started, not bringing it to its logical conclusion. And all because he does not believe in his own success. The lion’s share of his thoughts is occupied by fears, self-doubt and self-doubt. Instead of focusing his energy and attention on the result, he is fully experienced.
- Average. Emotionally, a person is afraid that difficulties and failures will grow lumpy. We are not talking about any serious or long-term projects — he is afraid to let his colleagues down. In turn, the specialist ceases to boast of victories and achievements. The level of internal confidence continues to decline.
- Serious pathology. The person deliberately harms himself. As a rule, he was raised by strict parents. He firmly believes that the result of any business he undertakes will not be good enough. If successful, there is a feeling of depression, loss of interest in the implementation of new tasks and in life in general.
At the initial stage, it is easiest to defeat this syndrome. Therefore, as soon as you notice the first signs behind you, start acting. All in your hands.
How to beat the impostor syndrome?
Very often people let everything take its course, because they simply do not know how to deal with the disease. Naturally, this only makes the situation worse. After all, the older a person is, the harder it is to break his stereotypes, tune in to the “right wave”.
Recommendations
- Admit to yourself that you are suffering from this. After all, as long as you deny everything, you will not be able to effectively deal with the disease.
- Do not underestimate the importance of your successes and gratefully accept praise. You must remember that from the outside, people know better whether you are worthy of it or not. If you are being praised, believe in yourself. You should not immediately begin to deny, to say that you have nothing to do with it, you just got lucky or that the circumstances developed. Remember, with excuses, you simply harm yourself, your confidence and, as a result, success.
- Don’t deny compliments. When you do this, you question the correctness of the interlocutor’s judgment. This attitude can be detrimental to your social position, there is a risk that people will begin to try to avoid communication with a person who questions their words.
- Do not sow doubt by talking about your work, abilities, tasks performed. It is manifested by such words as “just”, “probably”, “most likely”. This kind of insecurity is a blow to your competence and authority in the eyes of others. Leave such words for other cases, but not for those when it comes to work.
- Take for granted the fact that there are no perfect specialists, and do not strive to become one. Learn new things, improve yourself, but in no case do not chase after a ghostly ideal. Remember that you can always find a question that even a seemingly perfect specialist does not know the answer to.
- Don’t attribute your successes to luck. Know how to recognize that this is your only achievement, and you deserve recognition.
- Keep a diary — write down your successes and failures. Looking through it, you will be able to analyze your life. As a result, after a while, you will be able to clearly identify your successes and begin to be proud of them.
- Accept it as a fact that there are things you know and also things you don’t know and will never know. And that’s okay.
- Engage in self-development. Take a variety of courses that will help build confidence in your abilities.
Conclusion
According to the results of psychological research, approximately 70% of adults consider themselves impostors at some point in their lives. This is a common occurrence. Only some successfully fight it, while others let it into their lives and live like this for all subsequent years, not understanding what damage they bring.
I also recommend that you look at the article on the psychology of poverty. After all, poverty is only in our head.
Strive to develop adequate self-esteem and listen to the opinions of other people who have achieved significant goals. Don’t set too high standards and you will succeed.
All the best! See you in new posts!