Such a dream can seriously frighten or make you doubt your own mental health. In fact, our unconscious gives us a clue. It remains to decipher – which one.
18+
Anna, 23 of the year
“The second time I dream that I have sex with my father. In a dream, it seems to me that this is normal, correct and the best possible option. What is my problem? I was brought up in strictness – dad for me has always been and is adamant and the main judge of all my actions. I do not dare to argue with him, I can rarely disobey. To communicate with the boys forbade from school, the sediment remained to this day. Self-doubt and fears. There are still no serious relationships, and I graduated from school a long time ago.
Explanation:
It is very likely that your unconscious is letting you know that you are investing too much in the father complex, that is, in the relationship with the father. Let’s see how you describe your relationship with him. You were brought up in strictness, dad has always been and is the “inflexible judge” of all your actions.
Do you agree that you should always be judged for everything? What do you need this external “justice agency”, that without your father’s supervision you will go astray, you will not cope? And even now that you’ve grown up?
Strictness and prohibitions to communicate with boys, it seems, are still in effect, as if boys are a dangerous kind of people who must be feared and beware of, otherwise what will happen? Something necessarily bad?
Until you question the legitimacy of dad pressure, it will be difficult for you to find the right partner.
Your unconscious gives you a clue already by the fact that you perceive what happens in a dream as something correct and the best possible. As long as you don’t question the legitimacy of daddy’s pressure and the right to control your life, the danger that you will not be able to find the right relationship will remain.
Unless papa will take care of it; this also happens – when parents choose a partner, saying: “This person suits you.”
You ask: “What is my problem?” You need to ask yourself this question: “Do I want to be free from the fact that someone, even dad, always knows better than me what suits me, what is good and what is bad for me?”
If you don’t want to change that, then I would say it’s really a problem. If you are writing this letter as a question of what to do, I would advise you to find an opportunity to work with a psychologist in order to figure out what is yours and what is imposed, lowered “from above”, but what you just live with, accepting without criticism as proper and the only true.
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About expert
Larisa Harlanova – clinical psychologist, analytical psychologist, member of the Moscow Association of Analytical Psychology (MAAP).
Ассалом. Шабе нест ки ман хоб надида бошам. Имшаб дар хобам ҷавонон ( писару духтарон)-и дар ҳаёти ҳақиқии тамоман ношиносро дидам, ки гуё дар хоб онҳоро ҳамчун инсонҳои бадахлоқ мешиносам. Онҳо бо ҳам баҳс мекарданд ва дар рафти баҳсашон писар ба писари дигар гуфт ки ба ин духтар адабашро нишон диҳед. Яъне ишора кард ба кори бад ( алоқаи ҷинсӣ). Бо он духтар амали баде анҷом доданд ва ман аз паҳлӯ нигоҳ карда ба дилам мегуфтам ки чи қадар инҳо беимонанд, аммо натарсидам. Он духтар сарашро бардошта тарсида гуфт: Оё Шумо аз Қуръони Карим чизеро намедонед? Дигар суханҳое ҳам гуфт, ки онҳоро дақиқ дар ёд надорам. Ман гӯё ба мисли телефон чизеро гум кардаам ва дар ҷустуҷӯи он шудам. Давомашро он қадар дар хотир надорам хеле омехта буд. Таъбири ин хоби ман чист? Ва лутфан гӯед ки ҳар шаб хоб дидан низ чӣ маънӣ дорад.