Contents
- 1. Who is stronger is right
- 2. The big ones always beat the little ones.
- 3. Violence solves problems
- 4. If a parent hits me, then something is wrong with me.
- 5. You enjoy hurting them emotionally and intellectually.
- 6. Parents can’t be trusted
- 7. They’re so scared they can’t think.
- 8. Parents don’t deserve respect
- 9. To avoid physical punishment, you need to lie.
Children know how to get out of themselves. The kid throws a tantrum in the store or in the park and spits healthy food. The student does not sit down for lessons, is rude and does not go to bed on time. A teenager daily provokes conflicts at school and at home. Some parents can’t stand it and start raising their kids with spanking. But what does physical punishment actually teach?
Spanking is a socially acceptable parenting method in many cultures. A 2009 study showed that physical punishment leads to a decrease in gray matter in a child’s brain and negatively affects brain development in general. That’s what you teach children if you raise your hand against them.
1. Who is stronger is right
You resort to physical punishment to show the child that he is wrong. So you let him know that the one who is stronger can decide what is right and what is not. What will happen when he grows up and becomes stronger than you?
2. The big ones always beat the little ones.
By your actions you broadcast this idea. It is especially strange when parents punish a child who hit another.
3. Violence solves problems
Spanking teaches that any problem can be solved by force: «I don’t like what you’re doing, so I hit you.» Thus, you make it clear that by applying force, you can quickly get the desired result.
4. If a parent hits me, then something is wrong with me.
When a child is beaten by someone who should protect him, he has a question: “What is wrong with me?” Punishment destroys self-esteem, and in the future will prevent him from succeeding.
5. You enjoy hurting them emotionally and intellectually.
According to research conducted at the Canadian Children’s Hospital, corporal punishment provokes intellectual impairment and long-term developmental problems. This is true even if you hit a child with the best of intentions.
6. Parents can’t be trusted
Have you ever been grateful to your parents for beating you? Of course not! Most likely, you thought: “I hate you!” Spanking, even infrequent and not too painful, undermines the trust between parents and children. The child no longer believes that you are always on his side.
7. They’re so scared they can’t think.
Research by geneticist Bruce Lipton shows that higher order thinking is impossible when a person is afraid. Spanking negatively affects school performance. Fear triggers the fight-or-flight response and promotes the release of adrenaline and cortisol. Thought processes in this state are disabled. Do you want your child to study well? Don’t try to scare him. On the contrary, try not to provoke fear.
8. Parents don’t deserve respect
We seek advice from people who support and inspire, not humiliate. If you want to become such a person for a child, stop beating him.
9. To avoid physical punishment, you need to lie.
Physical punishment is forced to avoid communication with parents, and in their presence to lie and dodge. There are better ways to explain to a child what is good and what is bad. Let’s use more humane methods of education, the children will say thank you later, and their children too.