Contents
When men lack success in the field of work, family or sex, their bodies become the closest and easiest area to work on. Bodies that express what they themselves cannot say in words.
- – Modern men treat their bodies in an extreme way. They neglect to the limit of reason, or on the contrary – they deal with it obsessively – explains the psychotherapist Robert Rutkowski
- Failure to do so can mean overwork, weight loss, addiction, or ignoring your health. Doctors are sounding the alarm: there is a growing number of men under the age of 45 who have already passed their first heart attack
- However, many men sometimes go to the other extreme. Physicality then becomes an escape from difficult matters, and caring for it, often obsessively, allows you to restore the lost sense of control
- – The earliest sign that there is something wrong with a man’s well-being comes from the sexual sphere. – We are dealing with a whole generation of sexually disabled men – says Robert Rutkowski.
- You can find more such stories on the TvoiLokony home page
The image of a man who treats his body as task-oriented and instrumental is quite deeply rooted in the Polish consciousness. He expects strength and effectiveness from him, uses him to overcome daily challenges, and puts him to the test of endurance. And at the same time – he doesn’t really care for them, he treats them not very tenderly and doesn’t really reflect on his condition.
The bodies of our grandparents and fathers were, above all, to be gainful, sexually fit, fertile, and tough enough to care for the family. However, the last two decades have brought many changes in this area. The body of a modern man is today primarily a tool for communicating his emotions to the world and a barometer of his well-being. Gentlemen today pay much more attention to their bodies than their ancestors. And do they care more about them? It can be different.
Extremely bad, extremely good
– It is the malign of modern men that they take their bodies to the extreme. They do not deal with them at all, they neglect them to the limit of reason, or, on the contrary, they deal with them obsessively and very much. – says psychologist and psychotherapist Robert Rutkowski. – I have many patients who donated their bodies on the altar of material wealth, completely neglecting their health, joy of life and relationships – he adds.
This sacrifice can range from exhaustion, overwork and neglect of health, to lack of weight control, to debilitating addictions. And the body, neglected for years, usually ends up being billed.
Doctors sound the alarm: there is a growing number of men under the age of 45 who have already had their first heart attack behind them. They also indicate that the so-called young heart attackers usually present a specific set of features and behaviors: they are ambitious workaholics, addicted to achievements and exercising control over a broadly understood career. They have been operating at top speed for years, they are exhausted and burned out, but at the same time they cannot rest effectively and efficiently. They cannot cope with excessive and chronic stress, are unable to relieve it and relax on an ongoing basis, and they soothe emotions too often with alcohol, because only alcohol brings quick and effective relief. Complementing this picture is usually an unhealthy diet and eating in a hurry, which lead to weight gain.
To support your body and its functioning, it is worth reaching for Bioherba Oil for him, which can be used both internally, affecting the functioning of organ systems, and externally on the skin.
Beer drinker with a cigarette
The report of the National Institute of Public Health – National Institute of Hygiene shows that the most common causes of death in Poland are cardiological diseases (40%) and malignant neoplasms (25%). Both types of diseases are related to the lifestyle. – According to current medical knowledge, about 90-95 percent. all cancers are caused by external factors, the action of which we can limit or even completely eliminate – said the Polish Press Agency Dr. Paweł Koczkodaj, deputy head of the Department of Epidemiology and Primary Prevention of Cancer at the National Institute of Oncology. Maria Skłodowskiej-Curie – National Research Institute (NIO-PIB).
- Cancer in Poland: they still kill too often, too quickly
The factors that Dr. Koczkodaj talks about are mainly smoking, drinking alcohol, obesity and an unhealthy diet. The results of the National Health Test of Poles 2020, the largest health study on the Polish Internet, carried out by the MedTvoiLokony website, show that as much as 92% admit to drinking alcohol. men. Energy drinks are drunk by 46 percent. gentlemen, and 42 percent. usually chooses meals that contain meat, although current WHO dietary recommendations suggest limiting the amount and frequency of consumption. Gentlemen also rarely eat vegetables, but too often eat fast food.
Although the best prevention of neoplastic diseases – apart from a healthy lifestyle – is regular self-examination, Polish men still believe that going to the doctors without obvious symptoms of the disease is unnecessary “looking for problems”.
- Time to take care of your heart. Results of the National Health Test of Poles
A good example is prostate cancer, which in Polish men ranks second among the causes of death from malignant neoplasms. Although doctors indicate that the number of cases has doubled over the last decade and appeal to men over 50 for regular examinations (mainly the determination of the PSA marker), Polish men are still afraid of visiting a urologist and are terrified of having a physical examination of the gland stepper. They also still believe in common myths about the prostate – first of all, that “at a certain age” difficulties with maintaining and urinating, as well as a decline in sexual function are unpleasant norms.
- The most common cancer in men. How does his treatment in Poland look like?
Muscles to be worked on
But overworked and neglected gentlemen with a beer belly who avoid contact with a doctor are only part of the landscape. Polish men more and more often fall into the other extreme – treating the body as a temple and obsessing over it. – When men lack success in the field of work, family or sex, their bodies are the closest and easiest area to be “processed” – says Robert Rutkowski. Physicality then becomes an escape from difficult matters, and caring for it, often obsessively, allows you to restore the lost sense of control. It is also an important message for the environment: I am efficient, effective, I achieve my goals, I cope. Many men take their bodies as their last resort.
- Men in Poland die most often from these diseases
This obsession often has quite a promising beginning – the desire to take care of one’s health, body shape, and to lose a few kilos. – There is nothing wrong with taking care of your body, as long as it does not go beyond common sense and does not come at the expense of other areas – says Robert Rutkowski. The therapist admits that he has many patients who are addicted to running marathons, who practice triathlon in an obsessive manner, who are caught by bigorexia, i.e. addiction to taking care of the muscles. They do it at the expense of their relatives, relationship and family.
The best touchstone
The earliest signal that long before anyone else shows that there is something wrong with a man’s well-being comes from the sexual sphere. Male libido is fueled by testosterone, and the killer of testosterone is cortisol, the stress hormone. The more stress, the less desire for sex, but also fewer opportunities in this area.
– We are dealing with a whole generation of sexually disabled menwho have choked on the possibility of possessing one click of a whole bunch of pornographic delicacies. And pornography changes the psyche a lot – explains Robert Rutkowski.
- A man comes to the doctor when he feels a decrease in libido. This is a disturbing signal
The second important an alarm signal in a man is often an unpleasant smell, neglect of personal hygiene. Many psychiatrists and psychologists recognize mood disorders, including depression, in this way. Of course, this is not a reliable diagnosis, but a signal that something is wrong in a man’s life.
The psychotherapist notices that Polish men are becoming weaker and less mentally resistant. – The male line is dying – says Rutkowski. – This is because there have been no wars over the last few decades, and the present day does not pose challenges, difficult situations in which a man could become active and prove himself – he adds. And without challenges, men go idle and drape. Their body begins to go limp, in many respects to weaken. They lose energy, stop seeing the joy of life. They feel ousted, sidelined, both in the social sphere and in their own families. This is easy to see by looking at modern homes where men have no place. – If someone is lucky, he has his office or garage, but let’s be honest: it’s a luxury for the chosen ones – says the psychotherapist.
– So we have a whole generation of men in Poland who have never had their place in the most literal sense of the word. It is very symbolic and strongly influences their perception of themselves – explains Robert Rutkowski.
Keyword: acceptance
A man who cares a lot about his appearance and focuses too much on it can be just as unhappy and helpless as the neglected one. Although modern culture encourages men to communicate their emotions more and more, most of them still have very little competence in this area. So they communicate with their body what they cannot express with words.
– Very weak boys are often hiding behind obsessive care of the body, covering it with new tattoos, and caring for muscles. Beautiful but terrified – explains Robert Rutkowski. – Patients come to the office who look like they are from the catalog: they have beautiful suits, elegant shoes, they are styled, they smell great. Then they sit next to me in my office and cry.
Modern man uses his body for one more important purpose: thanks to it, he wants to feel accepted. With his body he says: I am attractive, I take care of myself, I try, I can cope with life. – Many men throughout their lives, in various ways, look for acceptance because in childhood they did not receive it from their parents, especially from their father – explains Robert Rutkowski. – The most often absent father who, instead of taking care of his son, is still at work – he leaves when the child is still asleep and returns – when he is already asleep.
- It also occurs in men. The first symptoms are abdominal obesity and a decrease in libido
This deficit is reflected in all later life. It is the source of the difficulty in talking about your feelings, hiding behind the pose of a tough guy and the feeling that no one is interested in male emotions and needs. That what matters is what you see – appearance, strength, wealth.
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What strategies do men have to seek help today? – When a man sits opposite me, crushed by an alcohol or cocaine addiction, beaten and bruised by life, but still in the armor of a beautiful knight, I ask about his passion – says the psychotherapist. – He looks at me and, after a long reflection, starts listing what he likes to do: riding a motorcycle, climbing, fishing. And she immediately adds: but I haven’t been doing it for ten years!
And passion is an oxygen cylinder, without it, no man will get out of his life. It is the place where a man can meet his body anew. Take care of him. And thanks to him, enjoy life again.
Read also:
- “I thought that at my age it must be like that.” Half a million Poles have this problem
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- Small penis – causes, average penis length, methods of enlargement. A small penis and sex life