In difficult moments, we often ask: why is life so unfair to me? Psychologist Tatyana Popova, an expert at the Moscow Institute of Psychoanalysis, offers to answer another question that will be much more effective in a difficult life situation.
The question «what am I worth?» we ask most often at turning points. For example, when we choose a place of work and analyze our professional knowledge, skills and abilities. Or when you need to demonstrate strength of character in a difficult situation. But there are crisis situations when we evaluate not qualities and skills, but our whole path as a whole. We ask why our life is so difficult, does not give gifts, contains so much pain and suffering. And what is its meaning?
The exercise I offer to clients in this situation is called Jewel. You need to come up with an answer — draw, mold, compose a poem or dance the answer to the question «What is my value?». When we shift the focus from what life owes us to ourselves, a lot changes. How do I feel about my own life and what unique things do I bring to this world? The man recalls the support he gives to friends, that many projects would not have taken place without his ideas, and his family would have been completely different without him.
One of my clients was a teenage girl who was in a difficult situation. Her mother died, circumstances did not allow her to continue her studies in the 10th grade, there were many changes ahead. She complained that life was unfair to her, so I asked her to do the Jewel exercise.
The creative process opens up access to our hidden treasures, and it is our important task to comprehend and accept them.
She painted a sapphire with hands on the central facet. She began to talk about how she needed support. To my cautious question: “What can you offer life?” she thought for a moment and said, “I always tried to take care of my mother when she was sick and supported her. But I always support others, and I like it.”
Suddenly, she froze for a minute, and then said: “These hands in the picture are probably not accidental: I remembered how I saved one unfamiliar girl. We were walking in the winter by the river, and suddenly I saw a girl fall through the ice. I don’t know why I did this: I didn’t think, I just ran up, lay down on the ice and pulled her out.”
The girl entered the psychological college. Then she told me that it was then that she realized that the support of people is the main value of her life.
Art logotherapy allows you to find meaning through creativity and art. The creative process opens up access to our hidden treasures, and understanding and accepting them is an important task that will help answer the question “What am I worth?”.