Ill-bred children are wild children who live by their own desires and perceive everyone around them as something that they can use or that they need to fight against. On the contrary, an elementarily brought up child is already an adequate being and rather useful than harmful (we remember well that children can also be others, resembling a natural disaster). He is still a child, but at least he is a well-mannered child.
Optional goals of education
These are the main goals of education. They are carried out to a greater extent intentionally, consciously, they are socially approved, most parents agree with them to one degree or another. However, in addition to the main ones, there are private, optional goals of education. Optional goals of education are not always personally realized and not always socially approved. But in fact, in many families, when raising children, it is precisely such goals that are realized. Namely:
To be no worse than other people (“Grow a normal person”).
Raise a child who does not disgrace the parents and does not interfere with the lives of the parents. Sad option — the smaller the child, the better, according to the principle. “At first, a child learns to walk and talk, and then to sit and be silent”… Sometimes this is the realization of the concept “A comfortable child is an obedient child”. A child appears when he can please, and disappears when he is not up to it. And once it was the position of «Free parents next to free children.» Parents make sure that the child does not oppress their interests, as well as that they do not oppress the interests of the child.
Self-realization through the child. Sometimes it is an understandable and justified desire for the child to continue my work and my destiny, sometimes it is a controversial desire for the child to live my life, because mine did not work out …
Children should be useful. The options are different, from «The child as a free labor force serving me as a lazy person» to «The child should grow up to be a caring person who responds to the needs of others.»