“We are all creations for a day”

“Irvin Yalom has definitely perfected a special genre – the story of an experienced psychotherapist about the meetings taking place in the office where he receives clients. This genre of psychotherapeutic stories emerged only a few decades ago. In terms of the twist of intrigue, the unexpected twists and the dynamics of what is happening, these stories are quite comparable to the best examples of the detective genre. Only the intrigue here is special – it concerns events that take place not around us, but in the soul of the client, in his inner life.

A psychotherapist, even Yalom, is not a magician, and at the age of 82 he continues to study, again and again asking himself the question: what really helps? And he finds unusual forms and ways to tell about what he understood in his profession, and, most importantly, about what he could not understand.

The new book is written in his favorite genre – what can it give the reader who first discovered Irvin Yalom? It may not give anything – there is never a guarantee, as in general in any meeting. But, of course, it offers insight into the essence of true depth psychotherapy. This process does not mean communicating with an all-knowing expert who reads all the secrets of the soul like an open book. On the contrary, true psychotherapeutic work is built on the relationship between two imperfect mortal beings, and only because of this does it bear fruit, often contrary to all expectations. A psychologist is not the one who knows the answers to all questions, but the one who knows how to look for them. And all the answers are stored only in the soul of the client, and the maximum that a psychologist or psychotherapist can do (but this is a lot) is to help clear the blockages on the way to them and help the client move towards them, and not away from them, as we often do. and we do.

Read more:

• Irvin Yalom: “My main task is to tell others what therapy is and why it works”

But besides the craft, the book reveals the depths of life. It differs from Yalom’s other books in that almost all the stories in it are somehow connected with the challenges of old age and death. Not everyone admits that they care about these topics, however, as the author shows with several vivid examples, attitudes towards death can have a decisive influence on our lives, sometimes from a young age. The ancients taught not to be afraid of death – when it comes, we will no longer be. But modern psychology clarifies: death often enters our lives long before it ends. And depending on how well we realize this and how ready we are to recognize its reality and inevitability, it either poisons us for many years, or, conversely, makes life brighter and deeper, making us feel more responsible for it. To be on the side of life means not to run away from the thought of death, but to accept it into life. Yalom has details.