TikTok: what did our children forget there?

For a year now, the word “TikTok” has been heard everywhere: children and teenagers have a new hobby. In Russia, TikTok has become the fastest growing social network: in January 2020, its audience was 18 million users, and by October their number had increased by a quarter (22,7 million).

But adults do not always understand why another network was needed. Are the former not enough?

The secret of youth success

“In adolescents, the main channel for obtaining information is visual, which is why video services are so attractive to them, unlike text-based social networks used by an older audience,” explains clinical psychologist Elena Beletskaya.

One video lasts no more than a minute, and while watching these “video seeds”, time flies unnoticed. But the video is also available on other networks, such as VKontakte.

“There are far fewer videos that adults seem meaningless or just stupid, but children like it,” notes family psychologist Zinaida Paramonova-Vavakina. – About how I went to the toilet, open the toilet lid and this is what happens to me. Or: I learned an elementary dance move, look how cool I do it. At the same time, I bulge my eyes, I have music … “

This is not a “sport of the highest achievements”, but simple actions that the viewer can reproduce and immediately post and with reason to consider themselves no worse and even better than others. For teenagers with unstable self-esteem, this is an attractive opportunity.

Their way of being friends

“We have a lot of girls and guys filming videos for TikTok. As soon as I started showing how my cat lives, half of the class signed up for me,” says 12-year-old Alice. In the new academic year, she became an active user of the service. “I was able to make friends even with those with whom I had not communicated before.”

Reportage videos are an affordable way of self-expression and socialization. “For teenagers, communication is of paramount importance,” emphasizes the family psychologist. – The same was done in adolescence by previous generations: they sat under the stairs, gathered at the garages, in the ravine. And now they are just like that on the Internet. Watching other people’s and one’s own videos on TikTok on any topic is a form of communication, and the safest one for a teenager’s self-importance.

They want to im(d)smack

18-year-old Kirill downloaded the application to his phone, because his girlfriend literally “lives” on TikTok. “I also started posting videos with my friends. I am subscribed to Garik Kharlamov, to Vovan from Real Boys. I love what they’re doing, I’m also trying to do some little stand-up stuff.”

Why copy? – sometimes the elders who appreciate originality are surprised. “Imitation is one of the forms of learning,” explains Elena Beletskaya. If I don’t know how, how and from whom will I learn? What kind of learning environment do we have? Parents are very limited, there is also the “school” and “circle” environment, but this is not enough in the modern world. The media has ceased to play such a role as before. Social media came to the fore. And if there is an idol there, if some rapper sticks out his tongue in some special way, the child will repeat it.

He both learns and satisfies his need to belong to the group, finds himself among other fans of his idol. “In addition, for their primitive skills, they receive likes – encouragement,” adds the clinical psychologist. “In conditions of limited social activity, for example, in quarantine, these “pluses in karma” please them.”

The Other Side of Fun

Many parents are worried about their children who spend time on TikTok. For example, 40-year-old Natalya, Alice’s mother. “The daughter from watching this nonsense is delighted. Constantly laughing at something, excited, and sometimes, on the contrary, too thoughtful. And there are reasons for concern, psychologists agree. “Any scrolling — scrolling through videos — causes a stuck attention,” Elena Beletskaya emphasizes.

On the one hand, this makes it possible to relax, to disconnect from current worries. On the other hand, it can be addictive. However, for many, the predisposition to addiction appeared long before the advent of TikTok.

“If a parent does not let go of the smartphone for six hours, then it is useless to demand from the child that he does not spend half a day on TikTok,” the clinical psychologist states. What did mom and dad do to distract the child from the computer? It is necessary to limit viewing to a few useful videos, and then switch attention to some other activities. You need to watch what your child does. But you have to start with yourself.”

Distorted world

Hours of unsystematic video watching leads to information overload. “Hence sleep disturbances, appetite disorders and what parents call bad behavior,” the family psychologist points out. – I constantly encounter this in my practice and first of all I ask: how long does your child walk?

These are the same dangers that lie in wait for adults stuck in screens. But the younger generation, exploring the world with the help of TikTok, risks not only health: it is likely that they will learn a distorted value system.

“For children under 14, this form of perception of the world is not constructive,” Zinaida Paramonova-Vavakina is convinced. – She does not develop them, because a child is unlikely to be able to understand everything that he sees there without an explanation from an adult. For children, TikTok can be dangerous.”

But teenagers can also go astray. They get likes for simple, effortless videos. And they get the false impression that serious study is not required, everything in life will be easy for them and it should be so.

“Adults do not control the worldview that a teenager develops under the influence of TikTok,” the family psychologist notes, “and then they catch on: why did you get it? Why do you think so? Why do you think you can behave like this? Because the child has seen enough, and he saw that these are behaviors approved by likes on TikTok, and he himself decided what is good and what is bad. His mind is littered with insignificant events in someone else’s life, which are presented as significant.

Enlightenment with a flaw

Not everyone on TikTok is all nonsense: as its popularity grew, teachers and tutors began to come there, some of them graduates with experience. Maybe TikTok will become an educational platform?

Elena Beletskaya is skeptical: “It seems to me that TikTok cannot replace school and classes with tutors. As with other social networks, a piece of free content is given to attract subscribers. Further, they are already offered to acquire knowledge for a fee. You still need to invest in systematic training.”

And the family psychologist warns against the danger of meeting a pseudo-specialist or a dropout who will only make things worse: “Age psychology and pedagogy is a system that provides for how to convey the same information to children of different ages, what to say to preschoolers, what to say in primary grades, how the same information can be expanded and presented to teenagers. If information in the wrong form and in the wrong volume is given to a younger child, he will not learn it, but then it will be difficult for him to give it, because he will not be interested, he will assume that he already knows it.

And adults there

The main users of the social network were the audience under the age of 24 years. Gradually, older users are being pulled up to them. Some want to know what their children are doing and watching. Others see new opportunities to promote their product. Others are looking for communication.

One of the TikTok formats is duets, which involve teaming up with other users. “I have been learning English for several years and also love to sing,” says 41-year-old Marina. – Before, my friends and I regularly gathered at karaoke. But the pandemic has deprived us of this opportunity. But there was another – to find a partner of interest. We rock with men from the Netherlands, Australia, Ireland. For me, this is a pleasant leisure time and an opportunity to practice the language.”

In this, TikTok is no different from other social networks, Elena Beletskaya believes: “Today, many are driven online by loneliness and the need for communication, and some by computer addiction.” Perhaps the point is also that in the modern world, many are in no hurry to grow up.

“You can talk about the infantilism of adults, and it didn’t start today,” remarks Zinaida Paramonova-Vavakina, recalling the program “Director Himself”. “In fact, this is the harbinger of TikTok, the plots there were extremely unpretentious, but the audience was delighted.”