Even psychotherapists and coaches are too lazy to do what needs to be done urgently. But psychotherapists know how to deal with an attack of procrastination. 11 ways proven by personal experience.
“… buy a plaster bust of Voltaire” … For several minutes I, like a ram, stared at the monitor at the Yandex search line and could not figure out how my fingers suddenly typed such a request.
In what feverish delirium did my brain want to see what not even a French philosopher looks like, but for some reason his plaster bust? For the past XNUMX hours (with a break for sleep) I have been sitting in front of the computer, trying to start writing another column for Psychologies. And I chose the right topic for the column — I decided to write about procrastination.
Translated from Latin, procrastination means «for tomorrow», from crastinus — «tomorrow» and pro — «on». That is, postponement. Postponing things that need to be done now. Right now, or even yesterday, how things were with the column.
And I never put anything off. Postponing, in my understanding, is consciously doing something later, because now another thing has appeared — more important, urgent, interesting or monetary … And this is honest, at least.
Something so bright appears in my life that it cannot be compared with the usual human routine, and I, being a dragonfly man, choose it, as opposed to the choice of an ant-man.
But in fact, I do not choose anything, and I have no obvious motive and «important» business. And instead of honestly starting to do something — writing a script, an article, a training program, a letter — I start to … hang out. I fall into the Procrustean bed of procrastination (sorry for the pun — I couldn’t resist).
A most unpleasant feeling of guilt arises, which blocks any activity even more. I’m angry at myself. For some reason, I just don’t want to do what I need to do.
A protest ripens in my chest, I prepare for a long time, perform rituals, fall into prostration — from a few seconds to hours. And then there’s always the langoliers, Stevenking’s time wasters: things to do, things to do, killing time, the time of my life.
I find dozens of self-justifications: you need to be aware of the news, be in touch, look for a job
From the outside it may seem that I am quite active. I water the flowers — I need to take care, I put things in order on the desktop — it is impossible to work in such conditions, I do the cleaning — how much dust has accumulated, there is nothing to breathe, I wash and hang up the laundry — especially when there are things that need to be washed by hand.
My dishes — life goes on, I read books — I have to read them (I can even go to the bookstore for urgent need, the last purchase, in fact, is just Voltaire), I watch TV shows — a new series is out, I shop in online stores, I pay for an apartment — urgently, urgently, while I remembered, I need to do it.
My windows — it’s better to work in a clean house, I hang a plan for preparing for the next marathon on the wall — thank God, my hands have reached, and then I need to check my mail, calls and texts to friends: friends are sacred …
I also like to screw up in a telephone conversation that I’m working now, and this fact seems to justify idleness — after all, people now know what kind of bee I am … And, of course, in the first place by a huge margin is Facebook (extremist organization).
The perfect langolier, super time killing machine. More precisely, a perfect suicide. I find dozens of self-justifications: you need to be aware of the news, be in touch, look for work and interesting projects, meet new people.
“Meli, Emelya, is your week,” our literature teacher repeated in a singsong voice on such occasions. “After all, it doesn’t matter to you what Bella Isaakovna says,” she added.
I’m even ashamed! I am ashamed, but somewhere on an unconscious level, and therefore I am not aware of my shame. After all, I’m an advanced pepper, especially a psychotherapist. I cynically joke with my friends about my own internet addiction.
The brain understands that you can’t “worry” about such nonsense, but you need to accept yourself the way I am — aaaaaaaaaa! — horror — all this psychological garbage in the head — stereotypes that make you be right.
Once one of my teachers, when I insisted on feedback after the completion of the joint work, said: “You, Vladimir, are doing everything right, you are even mistaken somehow right.” I was very offended at that time, there was no worse insult for the “creative nature”.
The other side of perfectionism is the constant fear of failure.
This perfectionism — the desire to do everything perfectly, to be right, to get the maximum approval from others — is one of the roots of my procrastination. The other side of perfectionism is the constant fear of failure.
I have to do only brilliant things, create only masterpieces. Therefore, every time I start something, it becomes scary: what if it doesn’t work out, suddenly there won’t be many likes, fans, female smiles, money, or someone will say that it’s boring and nonsense.
Hanging out on social networks destroys the imagined image of myself as an independent, freedom-loving creative person, so I “twist” as if in between things: sitting sideways on a chair, looking only out of the corner of my eye, bored scrolling through the tape on the phone with my finger …
What is it? Yeah… It doesn’t matter… So… Headlines, first lines of articles, key phrases of paragraphs, photos of beautiful and / or naked women… It’s like I’m peeping through the keyhole of the Facebook world and I’m afraid that they’ll catch me, so I twitch at every internal rustle and switch to another, the same empty business.
And I find myself reading some stupid text for half an hour already or looking at a plaster bust of Voltaire …
I have developed for myself several ways to return to reality:
1.Procrastination as art. Allow yourself to take a certain amount of time, and do it with taste — enjoy and enjoy. When the pause ends, there is a chance to start doing something. My recipe: take a bath with coffee, ice cream and Fargo.
2.Make an artificial deadline. It is very effective, but it does not work for long — you quickly get used to it and start to push it away.
3.Get to the bottom of the true cause of procrastination through introspection. As a rule, this is some kind of unresolved situation or self-deception. Understanding does not eliminate inhibition, but allows you to take further steps.
4.Wedge by wedge. Start any other business. As my friend Fuchsman said: “Start moving!” Go for a run, for example.
5.Cheat your own procrastination. Start working casually. In fact, I don’t work, and so, on the edge of my chair I write down theses — you see, once everything is ready. It even worked once.
6.Change picture. Go to work in a cafe. Very efficient. I found one near the house — you order American coffee once, and then it is endlessly topped up.
7.Morning meditation. Clears from yesterday’s toxins and unnecessary thoughts. Repeat as needed throughout the day. As many times as needed.
8.Cold shower. Cold and hot shower. Deadly effective. Altered state of consciousness for the first few seconds.
9.Do not turn on the radio (TV, Internet, etc.) in the morning. Don’t let the outside world in until the work is done.
10.Donkey carrot. Create a pleasant light motivation. Here you do, and then … (any pleasantness, even carrot juice).
11.Remember that after the end of work there is always euphoria. Endorphins know their stuff, oh yeah!
In Voltaire, by the way, I undertook to read Candide, or Optimism. Working righteously is so logical, but being lazy and missing deadlines is so irrational. But for some reason, logic brings boredom, and life is the most absurd absurdity. After all, we live in the best of the worlds!