Perhaps you have ever been abandoned without explanation: they did not pick up the phone when you called, did not answer messages, although everything was still fine a day ago. As a result, you were left alone with the feeling that you were betrayed. And now you are tempted to do so. But do not do this: there are ways much softer and more environmentally friendly.
It doesn’t matter for what reason you want to end the conversation: whether because the interlocutor didn’t like you, or you learned something about him that disappointed you, or because your plans and priorities have changed (you were in a romantic search, and then resumed the previous ones). relationship) – you should not leave a person without explanation.
And not only because the world is small and you run the risk of one day coming face to face with the one you left behind. Although just for that, it would be nice to have the courage to explain.
More importantly, your failed partner doesn’t deserve to be tormented by questions. He has the right to know what went wrong in order to turn this page, draw conclusions and move on. In the end, put yourself in his place: how would you feel if you were left without explanation?
Chances are you send at least 20 to 50 messages a day, so take the trouble to send one more. Of course, at the same time, you need to take care of the feelings of the interlocutor: in any case, he will be hurt, but it is in your power to soften the blow.
What can you write to someone with whom you decide to part
- “You know, you’re an amazing person, but I don’t have romantic feelings for you.” Simple, short, to the point.
- “I have thought it over carefully and do not see any prospects for the development of relations. But you are a wonderful person and I wish you all the best!” A good way to indicate that you’re just not right for each other.
- “I’ll be honest with you: I met someone and I want to be with this person. But I was very pleased to meet you and get to know you better. Honestly and sincerely.
- “I don’t want to date anymore. Sorry for the false hope.” Another way to not beat around the bush.
- “I was pleased to meet you, but we are clearly looking for something different from a relationship. I think we should both find someone else.” In this case, you don’t say at all that something is wrong with the person – you just don’t go along the way.
- “It’s very cool with you and you are a great friend for me, but, alas, nothing more. I would be happy to remain friends with you, but if this does not suit you, I understand too. Yes, sometimes it happens: we really want to continue communicating with a person, but in a friendly way. He or she may refuse, but it’s worth a try anyway.
It is unpleasant for each of us when we are rejected, but it is especially painful when they do not even consider it necessary to explain ourselves. Don’t do this to others. Spare their feelings – and at the same time free yourself from the burden and fear of one day meeting the one you abandoned, face to face.
What not to do
- Hint that there is still hope. By saying “I’m just not ready for a new relationship yet,” you mean that perhaps in the future a person will have a chance.
- Refer to work, health conditions or other factors beyond your control.
- Be vague – so that the interlocutor does not even understand that you intend to interrupt communication with him.
- To speak harshly about a person is not easy for him. Don’t go into details, just write that the decision is final.