Spoiled children often like to remember their rights, but do not represent their real content. Usually they are sure that they can do anything: throw porridge and yell at their grandmother. And when they learn the word “duty”, they apply it first of all to their parents: “You are obliged to feed us and support us!”
Sooner or later, such spoiled children need to be explained that this is not entirely true. The following statements will help you:
“Yes, in accordance with the Constitution, I will always give you food in the amount of the required number of calories, like in an orphanage. You’ll get a sandwich and a glass of tea and wear cheap jeans. By law, I am not obliged to buy you juices and ice cream, give you money for movies, provide you with a TV, especially a computer, and buy new things. You will give me a mobile phone, and you and I will live by the laws. Do you want a life according to the law or like the people in the family?”
The most acute issue of rights and obligations arises in adolescence. If children, specifically teenagers, begin to «swing rights» and cease to treat their parents with due respect, it is quite legitimate for them to formulate the following tough things.
Household chores are for the children. It is wrong to say: «We help mom.» That’s right: «We take care of household chores, mom helps us.»
The care to find out what the family needs is on the children. If this issue is not resolved after breakfast, children do not approach the computer without the permission of their elders.
Children sometimes think that their parents owe them a lot: provide them with education, entertainment, so that they look good and feel good. In good families, children get used to this, but it is wrong to think that someone is obliged to provide it to them, their parents should not.
No one owes anything to children other than the rights that they are entitled to under the constitution of the Russian Federation. Higher education, computer, cinema and entertainment are not part of the constitutional duties of parents, but if the children behave well, parents can help them with this.
The distribution of rights in the family is established by the elders. How many and what rights they will have, they will be told. If they behave properly, treat their elders with respect, fulfill their duties at home and turn into adults and decent people, their parents will give them great rights.
Dear parents, do not limit yourself to the wording “How to encourage a child to do something around the house?” How to get him interested in doing lessons? Trying to «motivate» and «interest» is the right desire, but if the child does not want to, you just need to force him. Otherwise, life will force, but later and with big troubles. The duty of parents is to acquaint the child with the fact that in life you need to do not only what you want and when you want, but also what you just need to do — and when told by the elders. When your child goes to work, no one will babysit him there. And how will he follow orders if you taught him to ignore orders all your childhood? And most importantly, sooner or later he will have to become his own senior and fulfill what he himself has decided for himself. Will he handle it? Or will he go to psychologists, complaining that he cannot organize himself in any way?
In addition to wanting, I need to eat. Dear parents, pass this on to your children!
And finally, a post from the Internet:
Call from older brother’s wife:
— Sasha left for Moscow on business, please help, my daughter gets up on the ledge of the balcony, she wants to commit suicide.
I drop everything, I fly to the other end of the city, to save the child. (PS The child will soon be eighteen years old). Upon arrival, he immediately sat down to talk, tuning in to understanding: you never know the girl has problems.
— Do you have any problems?
— YES! The goat’s father doesn’t want me to buy a car for my eighteenth birthday! Everyone has it, but I won’t! I’m going to ride buses like a sucker?! He has no money! That’s how mothers buy jewelry, so eat! And for a car, just for a million dollars, she doesn’t.
For the first time in my life, I felt like hitting a child, come on a child, a girl!
I remember very well how my brother dropped out of school in order to go to work, since the child was early. I remember very well how I got into huge debts so that she had everything that her little darling wanted. How doted on her soul, giving almost the last.
We wanted to raise such children?