The role of a father for a girl: what only dad can teach

1. She wants you to love her.

More than a million different girly things that she asks you and which you, of course, buy her. She may not ask, «Daddy, do you love me?» But that’s the main thing she needs. This is the role of the father.

Your daughter may upset you, she may make mistakes and even turn her back on you sometime, but never make her doubt your love. Look into her eyes and tell her this. Do it today and don’t forget to repeat every day.

2. Listen to her music

When all four of my girls are in the car, Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Lana Del Rey sing in it — in general, none of those whom I would listen to if I was driving alone. With one exception — I love Taylor Swift. But if this music ignites them, we ignite together!

3. She carefully watches how you treat her mother.

If you don’t have time to read the whole list, just read this one, it’s the most important one. The best thing you can do for a daughter is to love her mother. It is easy to dedicate one’s life to a child: one can live with her circles, studies, competitions, move with her from class to class. But take my advice — fight for your marriage, make it a priority.

Those periods of my life when I stopped going on dates with Brooke, my wife, did not make appointments with her just for the two of us, were at the same time the most difficult and problematic periods in the life of our children. I don’t think it’s random. Find time for joint trips together, show the children that your wife is a priority for you and that you are two people in love with each other, which is why such wonderful children were born.

4. Don’t retreat into the shade when it grows up

Boyfriends, looks worries, chatting until midnight, whatever happens, my girls won’t see me moving away from their problems just because they’ve grown up and their bodies have changed. Father’s love comes with a lifetime guarantee. And I will support my daughters at fifteen just as I supported them when they were five.

5. You influence which guys she chooses.

One day she will want to marry someone who will love her just like you. And our youngest daughter even says that she will marry me when she grows up. And only a father can tell her that he is already married to her beautiful mother, and she will have the same loving family with someone who will love her the same way I love my wife, her mother.

6. Teach her how to do push-ups

My girls are definitely not weak, just like their mother. They play sports and don’t understand what it means to «throw the ball like a girl.» They think it’s such a compliment. And in addition to physical strength and endurance, we bring up perseverance and stamina in them: they will be more useful to them in life than pink dresses and fairy tales about princesses.

7. Create family memory and history

In my family, they jokingly call me the “chief keeper”. I’m not against. Do you know why? I know that I still have 50-60 years left on this earth. Not so little, but not very much either. Therefore, I want to create as many memorable moments as possible and leave memories of myself for the girls.

We celebrate big events like «first trip when you’re 10 years old», but we also have small family celebrations that we take very seriously. Family movie nights on Fridays, big breakfasts on Saturdays, hiking on Sundays. The role of a father is to fill their travel journal with memories of what they did together. This memory will give them strength in difficult times.

8. Show your daughter that the world doesn’t just revolve around her.

Because it will make her life easier. We teach girls that life is better when you understand that you are not alone in the world. Helping others, sometimes giving in — it’s better for the soul.

9. Go to school matinees

Of course, the early years of children often coincide with the beginning of their parents’ careers, and it will not be possible to come to all matinees and concerts. I’m not a fan of theatrical performances about bunnies and snowflakes. But if I come there, I will clap the loudest.

10. Sitting next to each other and being together are not the same thing.

For me, there is nothing sadder than seeing parents at children’s matinees, checking mail and news on social networks. When you are at home, your daughter wants to be with you. For her, that means playing with you, talking to you. I myself forget this too often. Just because you’re sitting next to each other doesn’t mean you’re together.

11. Show her that men can be soft.

That they know affectionate words and are not shy about saying them. That they can help pull unruly hair into a ponytail so that it will be the most fashionable hairstyle in the class. Whatever you say, raising a girl is a real pleasure.

12. Take her out and treat her like a gentleman.

It doesn’t take tons of money to do this. You may call me old-fashioned, but I open the door for each daughter, pull out a chair for her in a cafe and listen to her story as carefully as if she were already a grown lady.

With each of your daughters, you should have moments when you go for a walk just the two of you, each should have time when she can talk with you alone, share problems and joys. A short walk around the house or a bike ride to the nearest park. Nothing complicated, but it’s important.

13. Tell her she’s beautiful

You have become the father of a girl, and now it is your job to tell her that she is beautiful. But do not forget that her heart is truly beautiful, and for this she does not have to try to fit in a size S.

14. Ask for forgiveness if you are wrong.

I forget points 1-13 more often than I would like. But I’m trying. If I happen to offend one of my daughters, or when my intentions were better than my actions, I learn to ask for forgiveness.